Gathering Flowers for the Master’s Bouquet The True Story of One Woman’s Walk of Love by Jean E. McLaughlin Edited Patricia Soodsma Copyright  2000 Jean E. McLaughlin All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review, without permission in writing from the author or publisher. Printed in the U.S.A. by Morris Publishing 3212 East Highway 30 Kearney, NE 68847 1-800-650-7888 Dedications 1. To my Lord and Savior, Christ Jesus. 2. To my daughter Mary Elizabeth, whose smile has always brought sunshine to me on a rainy day. And who has helped keep me close to the Lord. 3. To my daughter Patricia Ann, who through her efforts have made this book possible. And who has always been there to help and comfort Mary and me. 3. To my wonderful natural family. Also to my family of God who have loved and prayed for me and been part of my life. Foreword Jean is my beloved friend and prayer partner. She is: A woman after God’s own heart. One who yearns to share the living Christ to all. A faithful intercessor, who is a watchman on the wall and stands in the gap. A wonderful mother and grandmother. One who has believed God for the unbelievable, loved the unlovable and prodded the prodigal. Her life has displayed the incredible love and power of God. This book will cause you to want to get back to your First Love. Helen Elley When I read Gathering Flowers for the Master's Bouquet, I developed a new understanding that God uses us the most when we simply desire His presence--even in the small things. I learned that there can be more to a grocery store than just going to buy groceries--there can be miracles waiting to happen on every aisle when we offer ourselves as a vessel for God to use. This book gave me a new concept of ministry altogether. I have always thought of only church leadership getting to do the "good" stuff. All He is waiting for is our willingness to be used wherever we are in our daily lives. This book is not about hearing a sermon and waiting for God to move. It's about living out a sermon and moving in God. Krista Brady Lippold BSN, RN, C Preface For years, friends have encouraged me to write a book about my life. I’ve often thought about doing so, but have always been too busy living life to take the time to sit down and record it. Now as I arrive in the latter and best time of my life, I have seen the value of undertaking the challenging job. I seek not only to record my story, but also to record the story of countless others in the Body of Christ who reached out and blessed my life. Everyone has a story and everybody has a testimony. The Bible says we are living epistles, read by all When I first found the Lord, I just fell in love with Jesus. I wanted to go and tell everyone the Good News. I wanted to be a missionary. I asked God to send me to Mexico or overseas to a foreign country. I had to go tell the world. I had such a burning desire in my heart to tell others about Jesus. In the story of the sower and the seeds (Matthew 13:1-23), Jesus likens the Word to seed and our hearts to the soil. He then talks about the great harvest in the end. I believe that every person who comes to the Lord is like a beautiful flower. It is our job to go out and gather in the flowers for the Master’s Bouquet. Even after I got little Mary and Patricia Ann and was confined to the house, I still had the fervent hunger in my heart to share the Gospel. One day as I was sitting in the rocking chair holding Mary, the Lord spoke to me. He said, “This is your pulpit. The rocking chair is your pulpit.” The Lord showed me that through it all, He gave me the ministry of love; first for my natural family and second for the family of God. A plain homemaker and mother can stay shut in with God and still have an exciting life. Every day can be filled with the wondrous works of God. God makes my life so exciting. I don’t have to have a big ministry and be known by everyone. All I need is for God to know me. I think one of the greatest call on a woman’s life is to be a mother and homemaker. That desire was in my heart all of my life and I thank God that He gave me the privilege and honor. I have not only been a mother to my own children, but to many others that God has brought into my life. Women do not have to bear natural children to be a mother. God can send spiritual children for them to nurture and love. This is a story of hope when all hope seems lost. I am a woman who took a chance on life, but not alone. I have a God who is big enough to meet every challenge. You may never see my name splashed across the headlines of major newspapers or see me on television. I have not reached thousands but remember, the shepherd left the ninety-nine sheep in order to find the lost one (Mt. 18:13). I invite you to join me for a cup of coffee at my table as I share with you the good things that God has done and is doing in my life. Chapter 1 Childhood Delights I started with humble beginnings, a simple country girl born in the hills of Mississippi. I learned early that a good family didn’t mean having a lot of material goods, but having a lot of love. Mother always taught us that a good name was more to be desired than riches or gold. I want to share with you about when I was a little girl, through the eyes of an innocent child. My parents would probably have had a different perspective rearing six children through one of the greatest economic depressions to hit our country. We had problems, but they didn’t seem to touch me in my bubble of love and innocence. I was born in 1926 in a little town named Holly Springs, Mississippi. My mother was Vivian Lynnwood McAlexander and my father was Robert Lee McClatchy. They were wonderful parents. I was the fifth out of six children. I had two brothers and three sisters. From oldest to youngest they were Frank, Ann, Bob, Mabel, me, and Snow. I received so much love in my family. We didn’t have a whole lot of material things, but we never lacked for essentials. It was during the depression, but we never heard our parents say that we were poor. We always heard we were loved. My parents instilled love in us and I consider that a gift from God. I think about the wonderful days that we had in the country. My sisters and I climbed trees and slid down grapevines. We picked the leaves off the grapevines, pinned them together and made dresses for ourselves. That was a fun thing. We dug up sassafras roots and Mama made us sassafras tea. We had persimmon trees on our land. Instead of waiting for the persimmons to ripen, we ate them green. Green persimmons made our mouths pucker and we laughed for hours trying to talk to one another. It didn’t take much to make us happy. We didn’t have a lot of toys, but we had the beautiful nature that God created. We ran barefooted up and down the hills, chasing fireflies at night. We ran after butterflies and were in awe of their beauty. Many times at night, we lay on the grass and looked up at the heavens to count the stars. We were so excited when we saw a shooting star. It always made me think of how big and awesome God was. In the winter when it snowed, we slid down hills on cardboard boxes and made snowmen. We loved the snow. We heated our house with a fireplace. We put sweet potatoes in the ashes of the fireplace to let them bake. We had a wire popcorn popper that we held over the fire to pop the popcorn. The popcorn was grown on our farm. The fire smoldered at night as we crawled into our big feather beds. In the morning, it was so cold in the house. We wore long handled underwear and heavy socks on our feet. We quickly dressed in the mornings to avoid the cold as best we could. There was no electricity at that time in our house. We read by kerosene lamps. The bathroom was an outhouse, which was down a path at the bottom of the hill. At night, we used a chamber pot that sat beside the bed. That was so we didn’t have to brave the dark and cold at night. However, we always had plenty of food and we stayed warm in the winter. As a child, I didn’t know anything else. It was a wonderful time for me. As I reflect back on these times, I weep because I realize what a hard time it was for my parents. Mama was a beautiful young woman. She married young and had six children. Because of the depression and hard times, they lived in the country. They didn’t have the conveniences that we have today. She worked extremely hard, but she never complained. She was always cheerful and loving with the children. My Father was also a hard worker. He farmed and did anything he could to support the family. We moved to town because Daddy got a job working for a wealthy person. He made a $100 a month to oversee the man’s farm. We thought we were rich. That was really big money. After moving to town and a bigger house, Mama said that those were the best years of her life. She began to enjoy life and have fewer hardships. Papaw Frank T. McClatchy and Mamaw Kate McClatchy lived in a log cabin not too far from us on a big hill. We visited them often and spent many days sitting on their huge front porch. They had a parrot named Polly. This parrot was so smart. Their daughter Mabel sent it to them from Texas. They taught the parrot to talk. The parrot said words like “Polly wants a cracker” and “nightie night” when it was time to be covered up for the evening. Once after a visit with Mamaw, my mother was walking out the door and Polly called out “Good-bye Vivian.” She replied with her own good-bye to Mamaw, thinking it was she that spoke to her. Of course, all the kids just thought it was so funny because Mama didn’t realize that it was the parrot talking to her. At noon time when it was time to eat, Papaw was down in the fields. Mamaw placed Polly on the front porch and told Polly to call papaw for dinner. It loudly called “Oh Papaw, oh papaw.” Mamaw also rang a large bell outside of the house. Then all the field workers came in for the noon meal that we called dinner. Mamaw had the most beautiful flower garden. There was a brick walkway through the garden. In the garden were violets, zinnias, foxglove, and many others. The flowers were just breathtaking to look at and smell. In one corner of the garden was a black cast iron pot that they used to heat water in for washing clothes. After Polly died, she was buried under the big black pot. Papaw was tall and lanky. He had a mustache and goatee. A favorite time of mine was when he took us all walking. He took us walking in the pasture and always warned us to watch out for the cow blossoms (manure). He had an old model T car. When it rained, you had to put the flaps up on the sides to keep the rain out of the car, since it had no windows. We rode it into town. Papaw bought us licorice sticks and peppermint sticks and we just thought he was wonderful. When Papaw passed away, Mamaw and her sister Big Auntie could no longer live by themselves. So my father built a one room log cabin next to our home for them. I was in the fourth grade when my family moved from the country into the big town of Holly Springs. The house in the country had two bedrooms, a kitchen and a dining room. All the girls shared one of the bedrooms and I can’t even remember where the boys slept, maybe on the back porch. The new house was on 420 Chulahoma Ave, in the heart of Holly Springs. It was a much bigger house with eight rooms. Mamaw moved in with us and had her own room. Mama and Daddy had their own room, the boys had a room, and all of us girls shared a room. Eventually, one by one, my brothers and sisters began to marry and move away, leaving more room in the house. The house had eighteen big cedar trees left over from the Civil War plantation days. Christmas was a very special time in our lives. We loved to go out to the farm and get our own tree. We always got the biggest one we could find, but then we would have to cut it smaller to fit into the house. We made construction paper chains and popcorn chains. We got sweetgum balls from the sweetgum tree. Throughout the year, we saved bits and pieces of aluminum foil and then we used that to wrap our sweetgum balls to make ornaments. We had a few glass ornaments that we never dared touch. Mama always hung those on the tree. As the final touch, she put the star at the top of the tree. One year our neighbors across the street threw out their Christmas tree and I noticed that it had angel hair and icicles left hanging on it. I went over and took the angel hair and icicles off to use for the next Christmas. Instead of hanging out our stockings, we put a shoe box under the tree with our names on it. It was for Santa to fill. The next morning we would find apples, oranges, nuts, hard candy, sparklers, and a gift. When I was older, one of my classmates called us all together to reveal to us that Santa was actually our mothers and fathers. I was shocked because I “knew” that I had heard the reindeer on the roof before. Also the coconut cake and milk we put out every year for Santa were always eaten. So I went home, feeling so wise with the new knowledge that I had, and told my mother. She said it was only for those who believe, so when you stop believing, Santa stops coming. In other words, she meant no more presents! This was horrible news, so I retracted my statement and reassured Mama that I still believed. One Christmas when we still lived in the country and I was four years old, we received a little china set made in Japan. Aunt Mabel who lived in Ft. Worth, TX, sent the tea set as a gift. Since there were three small girls, we had to divide them. We were so careful when we played with them, for these were real treasures. Over the years I swapped and bartered some of my things to my sisters, Snow and Mabel, until I finally got all of the dishes. I still have them and they are now over seventy years old. I went to high school at Holly High and the colors were black and gold. I loved to play in the marching band. We went over to the Cotton Carnival in Memphis and marched down Main Street. I played the clarinet and saxophone. When I would hear the drums beating, I just felt as if it was the most exciting time of my life. I played basketball and ran until I was so red in the face that I looked like a beet. My hair was very white and all the kids called me “cotton.” I was also a cheerleader and I loved to cheer the team on to win. I went to the ball games and cheered and cheered. After the games, I wouldn’t have a voice left. The most wonderful compliment that I ever received came from a prominent business man in town. He told my mother, “I’ll tell you what, that girl of yours sure can cheer.” That was the most wonderful thing anybody could say about me. Even today, I still love to encourage people as they run the race of life. Later, my sisters and I began to get phone calls from our boyfriends. We did not have a phone at that time, so our next door neighbors, Mr. and Mrs. Wade, let us receive calls on their phone. Mr. Wade bought some firecrackers and shot them off to summon us to the phone, because it was a long way for him to walk to our door. One firecracker was for me, since I had the most boys calling. Two firecrackers were for Snow, who was just beginning to date. Three firecrackers went off for Mabel, because she was engaged to be married and shouldn’t have been getting calls from other boys anyway. When the firecrackers went off, one of us would go running from the house. Mr. Wade always had a little smile on his face. I think he rather enjoyed it. We loved to go to Saturday afternoon movies. It cost $.10 and we could watch westerns all afternoon long. A dime was a lot of money, so we had to work for our tickets. Daddy planted a big garden every year and always had enough extra turnip greens to sell. I would go to my neighbor, Mrs. Booker, and ask if she would like to “engage” some turnip greens for $.10 a bucket. She usually said yes. Then I would pick a bucket of greens from the garden. Later on, as we got older (and wiser), we charged people and let them pick their own turnip greens. So we were paid for the goods, without having to do any of the work. (I think that it was Snow’s idea.) Chapter 2 Days of War In my junior year of high school, World War II began. We were briefed daily in the auditorium on Hitler’s movements and the countries that he was conquering. The principal showed us the countries on a large map and he plotted the movements. We didn’t have CNN back then. We didn’t even have television at this time, only radio. We were not involved in the war at that point because the country was not prepared for war. Preparation was starting to be made and later the government began drafting our young men. All young men had to register for the draft. I remember the day, Dec. 7th, when Pearl Harbor was bombed. It was on a Sunday and I had just returned from church. I was walking through the town square. There were a lot of troops who were on maneuvers around the area of Holly Springs. They were on their way home for Christmas, but then all leaves were canceled. It was such a sad day. Every week, the draft board called the numbers of those who had to go into war. Both of my brothers, Bob and Frank, were drafted. One was in the Pacific on the USF Randolph Aircraft Carrier. The other was in the Philippines. I remember how my mother prayed every night and how she opened our home as a cantina for any of the servicemen who came through town. She invited them to dinner and fed them hot biscuits, gravy, turnip greens, chicken, spaghetti and banana pudding for dessert. She wanted to share love with all those who needed it, because she felt that someone else would share their love with her two boys on the other side of the world. These were years of seeing the country unified. You saw no strangers. We were all in one accord and with one purpose--to win the war and bring our sons and daughters back home. It was a time when we loved Old Glory, our flag. We often sang God Bless America. We recited the Pledge of Allegiance with tears in our eyes. I pray that we will return to pride and love for our country and that we will thank God for the blessings of this wonderful nation. Those years went by fast. We had to ration many things. A ration board met and distributed a certain number of ration stamps to each member of a family. We had to have the stamps for shoes, sugar, coffee, and many other items. Most of the factories converted to producing war time products and things were scarce. Shoes and uniforms were made for the people in service first. The townspeople and neighbors were very sharing during this time. The people joined together in prayer for their family members who were in military service and for their safe return home. I thank God that both my brothers came home. On a Mother’s Day, they both received leave and came to see Mama. What a joyful day that was. Our family was back together again, if only for a short time. When I graduated from high school, my parents gave me a trip to Fort Worth to see my aunts Mabel and Francis. I was only going for a short visit, but while I was there, my cousin Pinkey talked me into staying and getting a job. She was married but her husband was in service, so she was living by herself. I stayed, but my heart was still in Mississippi. I spent all my money calling Mama. Finally Aunt Mabel said to Aunt Francis, “Let the child go home, she’s homesick.” So I went back home. After I arrived home, I moved to Memphis and went to work for Mallory Air Force Base. Memphis was only 45 miles from home and I could handle that distance. Single women were housed in the barracks on site. I roomed with Laney, an older woman from Boston. I loved to dance and we danced the jitterbug and other dances of the period. They held dances for the servicemen and we danced our hearts out. This was a fun time, even in the middle of the war. I always said that I would never marry a man who couldn’t dance the jitterbug. As things turned out, I married one who could only waltz. I met my husband during this time. He was in the navy and I worked at Mallory where he was stationed. My friend Laney was dating an officer and they set me up on a blind date with St. Elmo Murray McLaughlin. It was love at first sight. I thought he was incredibly handsome. We went out to eat and dance. That was when I found out he wasn’t much of a dancer. Love for Mac (as he was called) outweighed my love of dancing. About six months after we met, we were married in Holly Springs at the parsonage of First United Methodist Church. After the wedding, Mac and I lived in Memphis. During this time, the war ended. I remember the exact moment. I was working and heard people shouting and horns honking. Everyone ran outside and was dancing, shouting and crying. Of course I ran out to join the crowd. It was such an incredibly emotional time because the great war was OVER!! Chapter 3 Marriage--Laughter and Tears After the war, the country had to make new adjustments. Mac and I went through a lot of changes. Right before the war, Mac had graduated from a university in Texas. Before he entered into business, he enlisted in the Navy. After the war, it was a hard adjustment. There weren’t many jobs for returning servicemen. Most of the jobs had been wartime jobs and now they were converting back into a peacetime life. It was hard to find a good job. I went to work for General Motors and worked there for about fifteen years. They were very good to me. Mac worked in insurance for a while and then went to law school for about a year. Finally, he found a civil service job at Mallory Air Force Base in Memphis. Those were good years, but testing years. I was young, only nineteen and just newly married. Mac was ten years older than I was and had had an unsuccessful previous marriage. He also had a son from this marriage, Michael, whom he loved very much. Because of the difficulty of these times, Mac became depressed. He turned to alcohol for comfort. He had adopted the habit of drinking to help him handle the pressures of war. So he became an alcoholic. Later, Mac went to AA and I went to Al-Anons. These groups helped us by pointing us toward a higher power. Even though I had believed in God all my life, I still didn’t have a personal relationship with Jesus. It wasn’t until about twenty years later that Mac truly conquered his alcohol problem. However, that comes later in the story. We bought our first home in Memphis. Across the street was St. Matthew’s Methodist Church. I attended faithfully and even helped in Sunday School. Mac wasn’t ready to go back to church at this point, even though his mother had raised him in church. So I went by myself. We had good neighbors, Aubrey and Miriam Heilman, who became our dearest friends. They had three children, Sally, Lydia, and Michael. Michael was only about two when he became sick with a kidney disease. At that time, the disease was incurable. It was such a heartbreak for Miriam and Aubrey to lose their child. We walked through this pain with them and it served to knit our friendship closer together. Mac and I longed for children of our own, but hadn’t had any at this time. So we treated Sally and Lydia as our own. We took them to the zoo and parades. Miriam and Aubrey were so gracious to share their children with us. Aubrey was a big prankster and always kept us on our toes. One day he dressed up in a woman’s dress and shoes and came to our door. When I saw Aubrey, I thought to myself, “That is the biggest woman I have ever seen.” (Aubrey was well over 6 feet tall.) He knocked on my door and to my surprise I found out it was Aubrey. So later as I was cleaning out the closet, I had the bright idea to dress up in one of Mac’s suits. I put on his hat, grabbed a couple of magazines and headed down to Miriam and Aubrey’s house. Miriam said she saw me coming and thought, “That sure is a prissy man.” I approached the door, changed my voice and asked her if she would like to buy a magazine. At this point she reached out and hooked the screen door. Aubrey walked up behind her and said, “Hi Jean.” He saw right through my costume. One New Year’s Eve, we were celebrating with them and at midnight we all ran out in the yard. Aubrey had brought back a flare gun from the war, so he decided to shoot it. It was awful. Fire was falling everywhere. We were so afraid it was going to hit the houses and catch one of them on fire. We ran back into the house rather than risk catching on fire ourselves. Mac and Aubrey loved each other's company. They got together, turned on classical music, and each one sat down with a book to read. They read for hours in silence while Miriam and I were in the kitchen cooking and laughing. When we began to whisper, Aubrey would come back to the kitchen and demand to know what we were talking about. Aubrey was a bargain hunter, more for the challenge than the savings. One day Mac went grocery shopping with Aubrey and came home with a “great” deal on a case of sauerkraut and a case of ketchup. He spent most of the week’s grocery money on these two cases. Then as he and Aubrey were lounging in the den, I heard him call out that he was hungry for supper. I marched right in there and demanded to know what he wanted me to do with only ketchup and sauerkraut. Mac replied, “Be creative.” These were times of laughter even during the difficult times. The Heilman’s later moved to Birmingham, Alabama. Once when they came to visit us, Miriam sent Aubrey to the car to get the luggage. Aubrey then realized that he had left the luggage sitting in the driveway back in Birmingham. Even after over fifty years, they are still close friends of mine. Friends like these are a gift and treasure from the Lord. Mama and Daddy used to come to Memphis to visit us. A friend from Holly Springs often brought them over when he had work to do in Memphis. I remember the last time I saw Mama. As she was getting into the car to leave, I had the strangest sensation that I would never see my Mama again. The next week, Mama died from a heart attack at the age of fifty-six. It left such a void in my life. It took over a year for any of the pain to ease. The grief was overwhelming. I no longer could cope with life and I basically had a nervous breakdown. I took time off work, but even that didn’t help me. There is always a danger of putting your faith in loved ones instead of in God. Part of my grief was that I relied on Mama’s faith instead of my own. I had no personal faith in God at this time. God was way up in the sky and I had never brought him down into my heart. I was always busy trying to work my way into heaven, but yet I always felt a void in my heart that only God could fill. Mama’s death was such a hard time for all my siblings. She was so precious; such a kind, gentle woman who loved God and her family. Four months later, my father followed my mother to heaven. He was only fifty-nine. It was a very sad time in my life. Chapter 4 Family Ties & Good-byes By this time, my brothers and sisters were all married: Frank and Ruby, Ann and Woodrow, Bob and Trudy, Mabel and Tommy, and Snow and Charlie. Snow, Mabel and I lived in Memphis, while the others lived out of town. Snow and I didn’t have any children, so we took Mabel’s kids, David, Sandra and Patricia, and treated them like our own. Mabel worked, but I stayed at home. So I was the one the school called when there was a problem with one of the kids. When they would get sick, I was the one who went and got them from school. Patricia later told me I was an “easy touch.” They always knew Aunt Jean would never question why they were sick and would buy them a hamburger and milkshake to “cure” any ailments. Every Sunday night we ate with Mabel, Tommy and the kids. The kids especially loved their Uncle Mac. Snow married a dark, handsome Italian named Celso. We called him Charlie. They lived a couple of streets over from Mac and me. Snow and I worked together at GMAC, visited together often and were very close. One Christmas, I picked up the Sunday paper and saw on the front page a picture of Charlie and his mother, Lena. Charlie was born in America, but was raised in Italy. Charlie moved back to America before his eighteenth birthday. Most of his family were still living in Italy, including his mother. It had been quite a few years since he had last seen his mother. Unbeknown to Charlie, Snow planned for Lena to come see him for Christmas. She bought Lena’s plane ticket and arranged everything secretly. Charlie had wanted to know what Snow was getting him for Christmas. She said it was a great surprise. Everyone knew the secret but Charlie. A few days before Christmas, his boss sent him to the airport to pick up an “important client.” When he arrived at the airport, Snow and some others were waiting there. Then Charlie saw his mother come off the plane. Photographers snapped the photos as Charlie greeted his mother. They asked Charlie if he was surprised and what did he think that he was getting for Christmas. He said he thought he was getting a color television, but that this was a wonderful surprise. The newspaper saved the story for Christmas morning as a beautiful human interest story. Snow always did things like that to bring someone else happiness. Frank married Ruby and had two boys, C.B. and Tolly. They lived in Holly Springs with my parents until after their deaths. Frank loved to have family come visit and often the entire family spent the night at their house. The floor would be covered with pallets and there wouldn’t be any floor left for walking. His boys were both football players. At every game, Frank ran up and down the field shouting out encouragement and instructions. We called him Coach McClatchy, the side-line coach. Frank was a wonderful brother. After my father had a light stroke and couldn’t work, Frank began to work with him on the farm. Prior to that, he worked for my Uncle Wilbur at his grocery store. Frank was the oldest and he always watched out for the little kids. When we needed a nickel or dime for something at school, Daddy didn’t always have it. So we’d go by the store and Frank would always give us the money. Sometimes he gave me a banana or cookies. I used to say to myself, “When I get big, I’m going to buy all the bananas and cookies that I can eat.” Over the years I’ve eaten a fortune in bananas, they are my favorite fruit to this day. Frank was so kind. I learned later after I moved back to Holly Springs, just how kind Frank had been to people in the community. Even years after his death, people talked well about him. Ann and Woodrow (we just called him Woody) lived in the country. They lived in Mississippi, not too far from Memphis. They had two sons, Jimmy and Frank. We went to visit them and to eat some of Ann’s good cooking. She was probably the best cook in the family. Ann took over the position as “head of the family” after Mama and Daddy died. Ann was just like Mama. She was so gentle and loving. Woody had such a gift of humor and he always kept us laughing. Bob and Trudy lived in Louisiana. They always came up at Christmas and spent two weeks divided among all the siblings. One Christmas, Bob borrowed one of his friend’s prized hunting dogs. They brought this dog up from Louisiana. On the way up, this dog pushed the three kids off the seat and stretched out while the kids sat on the floor in the back of the car. They were going to stay in Memphis a few days and then Bob was going down to the country and take the dog hunting. I was the lucky one to keep the dog because I had the only fenced yard. It was cold, so Mac decided to put the dog in the garage. The dog howled day and night and tore the garage apart. Everything was in shambles. So we put him in the back yard and tied his leash to the fence. All of a sudden, we heard howling and thought someone was killing the dog. We ran out of the house and saw the dog hanging himself on the fence. He had tried to jump the fence while still tied to it. Since Bob had made such a big deal over the dog and how valuable it was, we decided to bring him into the house. I was cooking Christmas dinner and had my turkey sitting on a table near the kitchen window. The next thing I knew, the dog was standing over the turkey looking out the window and probably thinking that the turkey was his prize for the day. I decided that even though the dog had wrestled the car seat from the children, he was not going to take over my home. I called Bob, who was at Snow’s house and told him to come get the dog. He then took it to Ann’s house. Their house had a crawl space and so they put the dog under the house. He tore everything up and Ann banished the dog. Finally, Bob housed him with a vet. Before leaving Bob told me, “If I ever do something so dumb again, I hope someone will kick my butt.” I said, “Don’t worry, I’ll be glad to do the honors.” A few years later, some of the military bases were being closed. Mallory Air Force Base announced to all its workers that it was NOT one of the bases being closed. That evening after Mac came home from work, we saw the announcement on the evening news that the base had indeed closed. All the workers were being transferred to San Antonio, TX. It was like a death blow. The thought of having to leave my family was devastating. Mac didn’t have much of a choice, because there was no other employment in Memphis at that time. We put our house up for sale and the very next day someone bought it. I just cried. In my mind I had thought, “We’ll go and if I don’t like it, we’ll have a home we can come back to.” However, we burnt all the bridges behind us and left for San Antonio. Now I can look back and see that the hand of the Lord was moving in my life, but at the time I couldn’t see it. God uses circumstances to bring us to a point of surrender. Then He can fulfill the longings in our hearts that we don’t even know exist. As we prepared to leave, I had a call from my sister-in-law Trudy. She told me that my brother Bob dropped dead at the age of forty-two. He left behind three small children, Vivian, Steve and Robbie Lee. The shock of it was too much and I just could not believe it. Mac was in the garage packing and I began screaming for him to come in the house. Bob and I were very close. He and I spent our childhood teasing and picking on each other. When he returned from the war, he wouldn’t let me out of his sight and insisted that I go everywhere with him. So his death was devastating to me. Our neighbors, the Sanderlins offered to help oversee the movers as they loaded all our things on the truck. So we were able to leave early and go to Bob’s funeral. From there we drove to San Antonio and left the family behind. Our trip to San Antonio was my first time to drive on the highway. It was the middle of the summer and there was no air conditioning in my car. We had just bought Mac’s car and it had air conditioning. Unfortunately, his car was a stick shift and at that time I didn’t know how to drive a standard. I followed Mac and could see him and our collie dog, Princess enjoying the cool air while I melted in my car. Princess was a beautiful dog with long white hair and a few brown spots. She was a gift from the Heilmans and we loved her very much. She was the child that we were not able to have. Only God could have seen me through the ordeal. Our destination was a small hotel. We were going to meet a friend of Mac’s, Harry and Edna Smith. From there we were going to look for a place to live. We put our belongings in storage until we could find a house. I remember the first day that I met Edna. She was just as homesick as I was and we became bosom buddies. She had a little Chihuahua named Dinky. Dinky and Princess became friends too. We rented a home for about a month and then found a home to buy. It was not too far from where Harry and Edna bought a home. While we lived in San Antonio, we were only able to go home once a year. It was the only time I saw family, except when they would come visit us. We went home in the summer time and stayed with Ann and Woody. When I was a child we always had huge reunions, but these stopped after my mother and father died. After we moved away, Ann began to have family reunions again when we came home in the summer. During the first reunion, all of the immediate family were present except one nephew, Robbie Lee. He couldn’t make it and was down in Louisiana. I was just praying and missing him. As we began eating, Robbie and his golden retriever drove up. That made everything complete. I was thinking at that time, “This is the way it will be in Heaven.” I prayed that not one of my loved ones would be left behind and all would accept Jesus. Chapter 5 A New Life A time of adjustment followed our move. I was so lonely and homesick. If it wasn’t for Edna, I don’t know if I would have made it. Luckily we weren’t down on the same day. I cried on her shoulder one day and the next day she cried on my shoulder. I felt so vacant with so many losses. My family was first in my life and now they were hundreds of miles away from me. This time was hard for Mac as well. It was hotter in San Antonio than it was in Memphis. There was no air conditioning at Kelly. He became ill and went into the hospital for heat exhaustion. At that time, we didn’t realize that Mac had some more serious health problems involving his heart. Edna and Harry had begun going to Castle Hills First Baptist Church. They asked their pastor, Brother Jack Taylor, to visit Mac while he was in the hospital. I was so impressed that this young minister, who didn’t even know us, would take the time and to come visit Mac. After Mac returned home, other members from the church came to visit us and this also touched my heart. When the people came from Castle Hills, I knew it was the place we were to go to church. I had visited other churches, but none seemed to be what I needed. I look to the Lord in this because he knew where I needed to go to grow and to hear the salvation message. I began going to a women’s group with Edna. I could tell that these women really loved God. We were involved in hospital and nursing home visitations as well as luncheons and meetings. I still felt that there was something missing. One day I heard Ressie Albright talk about Jesus. I began to listen as she described her love for Jesus. I realized that she really KNEW Him, not just about him. At that moment, I knew that I wanted what Ressie had. Later, I was at a Wednesday night meeting. Brother Jack gave an invitation for salvation. It was simply to ask Jesus Christ to become Lord of your life. He would come in by His Spirit and live within you. For the first time, it seemed as if I really heard the salvation message. I said to myself, “Oh Lord Jesus, if this is so, will you please come and live in my heart.” I knew at that moment, Jesus came into my heart. About a year later, Brother Jack asked people to give their testimonies about how they came to be saved. I stood up and gave my testimony. After the meeting, Virginia came up to me. She told me that for about a year, she’d been praying for my salvation. I had met Virginia about a year before at a women’s prayer retreat. Phyllis had invited me to go to this retreat and I had been very hesitant to go. I didn’t know if it was something that I wanted to become involved in. God made Phyllis a “fisher of people” and she began to call me and encourage me. She was persistent. She was quite the fisherwoman and was determined to catch the fish. When I heard people praying at the prayer meeting and giving their testimonies, I had such a crying out in my spirit for God. I remember praying and crying, “Oh God, Oh God.” Virginia heard me praying and crying. Psalms says: When I came to wits end corner and I cried to the Lord and he heard me and delivered me from all my distresses (Ps. 107:27-28). That was when Virginia began to pray for me. I was so moved that someone had been praying for me. It really showed me the importance of praying for one another and how important prayer is in people’s lives. I’m quite sure that it was my own mother’s prayers that brought me to this place. Even though she had already gone on to be with the Lord, I’m sure she prayed for each one of her children to be saved. Jesus called us to be fishers of people (Mt. 4:19). If you want to be a good fisherman, you have to go fishing. You have to cast your hook where the Lord shows you to cast it. Once you start to reel in the fish, you must be persistent and hold steady until you bring the person into the kingdom. That is what Phyllis and Virginia did in my life. My prayer is that I will have that same diligence as I seek the lost to be added to God’s Kingdom. God knew how much I loved my family, so He didn’t put more on me than I could bear. About two months after we moved to San Antonio, my nephew David was stationed at Brooks Air Force Base. David and his wife Brenda had two children while they were stationed there--Kim and Tom. What a joy these children were to me. David and Brenda let us help raise Kim and Tom. When they came over, I sang songs and told them about Jesus. I took Kim to church with me. One day we were sitting outside enjoying the day and listening to the birds sing. I asked Kim what the birds were singing and Kim replied, “Oh they are singing Jesus loves me, Jesus loves me.” When children’s hearts are tender, it is so important to tell them about Jesus and let the love of God be birthed in their hearts. They stayed until Kim was two and Tom was one before they moved back to Memphis. Kim always called me Geen and one day she said to me, “Geen, I can’t be your little girl anymore. I’m going to move.” I remember how sad I felt and I said to her, “That’s all right darling, Aunt Jean is going to get another little girl.” As I spoke these words to her, the Lord knew the desire in my heart for children. Little did I know how prophetic those words were. Brenda and the children moved back to Memphis shortly before David was discharged from the air force. So he moved in with Mac and me until he was able to leave. They had lived in a little house on the base and when they moved, everything had to be spotless. David’s sergeant was a tough cookie and David begged me to help him get the house clean. The sergeant came in with white gloves on and did a complete inspection. He wouldn’t allow David to leave until the house was literally spotless. David had cleaned the oven three times at this point, so we prayed that the house would pass inspection. I knew that God would answer our prayer. I helped him clean the house again. The sergeant came out to the house and I personally gave him a tour of the oven after I had cleaned it. The sergeant barely looked at it and then passed the house. We both knew that God had intervened. He took the hardness out of the sergeant and put some softness in him. This was about Christmas time. Mac and I were going home for Christmas, but David was not going to be able to leave at that time. So David and I prayed in agreement and asked God to intervene and let him go home for Christmas. A few days later, I heard the car door slam and David ran up to the house yelling, “He did it, he did it, he did it.” God answered our prayers. David became eligible for an early discharge and was able to go home for Christmas. The Bible says “We have not, because we ask not” (James 4:2). Prayer brought me into the Kingdom of God, so I knew how powerful it was. I began to pray to God for everything. I was so hungry for God and His Word. I got up at night and read it for hours. I attended a Bible study at Ruth DeWolf’s home. They were studying the book of Revelation. I was so excited that I grasped what was being taught. I began to read the Bible and for the first time I understood what the Bible meant. The Spirit of God who lived in me gave me revelation and the Word came alive to me. Chapter 6 Treasures From Heaven About a year and a half after I came to know the Lord, I was volunteering in an outreach ministry. A minister came to me and asked if Mac and I would be interested in adopting a baby. With great excitement, I went home and shared the news with Mac. At this time, he was fifty and I was forty. His words were, “That is the smartest idea you have ever had.” I knelt down in our den and prayed, “Lord, I’ve desired children all my life. If you have a child that we could help, would you send it to us. We want one, not for our own pleasure, but one that would never be adopted unless we adopted it. We want a child that you could use for your glory.” The very next week, we received a call that there was a child waiting for us. So when Mary Elizabeth McLaughlin was two days old, we went to the hospital to pick her up. What a thrill it was. She was so beautiful. When I saw her, I was puzzled because I thought, “She is perfect, anyone would want her.” But I just said, “Thank you Lord.” When we brought her home, our next door neighbor Bubba ran out to the car. He was about eight years old and he wanted to be the first to see her. He exclaimed about how beautiful she was. All the neighbors came to rejoice with us. It was such a quick thing, that we were totally unprepared for a baby. I had no clothes; absolutely nothing for her. I gave my charge card to Edna and Maxine and we all went to the store. I told them to go and buy whatever a newborn needed. They went through the store buying everything they thought I needed. I was so excited that I just walked around in a daze. After twenty years, I was finally a mother! I just can’t tell you what a wonderful feeling it was that God heard my prayers and that we now had a little one. The night we brought Mary home, every time she wet or got something on her, I changed her clothes. She was like a little doll. I think I used everything up the first night. Later one of the neighbors gave us a shower and I got over a hundred baby gifts. The gifts flowed in for little Mary Elizabeth. It was such a wonderful experience. It was my time for being a mother and caring for a precious little one. At home, I saw her looking at me and it felt as if she was looking into the very depths of my soul. I can’t even explain what I was sensing about this baby. I know now that it was the presence of God with Mary. When she was six weeks old, we carried her back to be checked because her head had begun to enlarge. The doctor sent us to a specialist, a neurosurgeon. I know he was hand-picked of the Lord. His diagnosis was hydrocephalus and it was a birth defect that was present before birth. The opening at the top of her spinal cord was closed. It didn’t let the fluids bath her brain properly, so her brain was damaged. Her higher brain was injured and she only had a functioning brain stem. The doctor said there was no hope for her. He didn’t think she would live, but if she did live she would be a vegetable. The doctor planned to put a shunt in her head to drain the fluids from her head. I’ll never forget how I felt. I remember the day before we were to take her in for surgery. God spoke to me and said, “If she lives, she’ll be all right and if she dies, she’ll be with me. I am your hope.” So never forget that the Lord is our hope. Before I got Mary, I had been listening to teaching on the book of Job from Back to the Bible Broadcasting. I felt compelled to continue listening to it even after Mary arrived. I thanked God later for the teaching. I knew that like Job, God was not punishing me by putting this condition on Mary. Little Mary was not a punishment because Mac and I had sinned. It was instead for the glory of God. When I discovered Mary’s condition, I found myself rising up and defending God. I did not want anyone speaking against God and questioning, “Where is your God or why has God allowed this?” God didn’t need a defender, but I knew God answered prayer and that He was with me. He showed me that Mary Elizabeth would come forth and glorify God. I got Mary’s things together for the hospital; a little white jacket, her tiny shoes and small white Bible. I put them in a little box. We went down in the morning and many from church were there to support us. When the doctor came out of surgery, he was smiling and said that everything went well. We were so grateful. While Mary was recovering in the hospital, two Catholic nuns came to visit me. They encouraged me and made two cards for me. One said, “My grace is sufficient for thee” (2 Cor 12:9) and the other one said “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens thee” (Phil 4:19). To this day, I still have these cards in my purse and the words in my heart. Mary was doing well, but the doctor would not release her to us. The doctor, our minister and the adoption lawyer had a meeting without us. They decided it was too much of a burden on us and that we couldn’t bear it. They wanted us to give up custody of Mary. For Mac and me, it was the last thing that we were going to do. I knew that Mary was an answer to my prayers. God was in everything and God would take care of this too. We told them, “NO! God gave us Mary and we refuse to let her go.” So Mary stayed in the hospital for three months until legal matters were settled. I visited her every day. I had to release the situation to God and let Him do things His way. I told Him, “You know we want to care for her, but we totally release her to you.” One day there was a parade going on downtown near the hospital. During the parade, the main doors of the hospital were locked. I didn’t know this because I entered the hospital through a side door. It was a door that I didn’t usually enter, but for some reason I felt led to go in that particular door. As I went in, I noticed that there weren’t many people at the hospital. It turned out to be an appointment from God. Up to this point, I had not been able to get the doctors to respond to my requests concerning Mary. But as I walked up to the desk, there stood one of the doctors. I asked him about Mary. I told him, “Mary is not like a light fixture that you can turn off and on. We love her and we want her.” A few days later when I went to see Mary, the social worker came running up to me and told me that Mary could go home. The doctor came and released her that day. We were so happy to be able to take her home. It had been so hard to go and see her day after day in the hospital. She was all alone in the big hospital room; just a tiny little bundle lying in a huge bed. I asked the Lord to give Mary a smile and that she would know me. When she was about three months old, I went in and said, “Hello baby, it’s Mama.” And she gave me a little crooked smile. Oh my, how excited I was. I said it again and she smiled again. I ran out and told the nurses at the desk. They came in and talked to her, but no smile. When they left, I talked to Mary and again she smiled. It was such an anointed little smile that God gave her. It just melted my heart. After we brought her home, I had a small musical rattler and I shook it for her. She listened and then began to smile. She knew my voice and her daddy’s voice. Many looked on little Mary and saw her smile as a beautiful flower. As I was singing to her one day, the Lord gave me this song. “Praise the Lord Little Mary” This little flower is going to blossom and grow. This little flower is going to bloom we know. Blossom and grow and bloom we know for her King. This little flower is going to walk and talk. This little flower is going to dance and sing. Walk and talk, dance and sing for her King. This little flower is going to sparkle and shine. This little flower is going to be a gold mine. Sparkle and shine and be a gold mine for her King. Chorus: Praise the Lord little Mary, Praise Him with your heart. Praise Him for His glory, all the miracles start. After I brought Mary home from the hospital, I had to learn how to care for her. We got into a daily routine and we were so happy to have her home. People began to come in and God started to do a wonderful work in my home. My prayer to God was that He would fill our house with His presence and use us for His glory. I hungered and thirsted after God. I desired to have a Bible study within the home because I was confined a good bit with Mary. God did a wonderful thing, He sent Monica McGann to teach the Word of God. She and her husband, Aubrey, were ministers originally from Jamaica. They now lived in the States. Precious Monica was full of the Word of God. Women began to come to the meeting. Every Thursday we had a Bible study. Monica taught us the Word and how to pray. One day I realized what Monica was actually doing. She was claiming the promises of God. There were so many promises found in the Bible. Whatever her situation, she would find a scripture to stand on. God said it and she believed it. I began to practice that principle in my life. I saw miracle after miracle. I could hardly wait to get into the Word of God. It was a wonderful time in our prayer group; we loved one another and loved learning the Word. One day someone asked Monica to teach a city-wide Bible study and Monica agreed. Before she left, she brought Ruth Nelson from Asbury College. This college had had a great revival. Ruth came and shared about how they prayed and interceded and about the great revival that broke out in the college. The desire came to my heart to become an intercessor. I told the Lord that was what I wanted to be, an intercessor. I wanted to pray for others and see God move in wonderful ways. I was still praying for Mac’s salvation. While Mary was still a small baby, she became ill one Sunday. I insisted that Mac go on to church without us. Bob Harrington was preaching that Sunday. His sermon was that this Sunday could be the last time you hear the salvation message. I was at home praying and believing that it was the day for Mac’s commitment to the Lord. When he came home, he was so under conviction. He kept saying that he needed to talk to Brother Jack. I called Brother Jack and he came out to the house. Mac told him, “I want what Harry has, I want Jesus.” Harry had been saved about a year before and Mac saw a definite change in his life. So at fifty years old, Mac was saved and baptized. He had still been struggling with alcohol, but when he accepted Jesus, he was totally delivered from his alcoholism. He had lost all desire to drink. It was Mary’s first Christmas and I was busy addressing Christmas cards. Mac got sick and had to go to the hospital. We found out that he had had a stroke. The doctor told me it would take about three days before we would know the extent of the damage and Mac could possibly die. But the Lord told me that Mac would live and not die. I went home from the hospital and continued writing and addressing my Christmas cards because I was not going to receive any bad reports. We were thinking about adopting another child and I knew what God had promised us. While Mac was in the hospital, he roomed with another man. I witnessed to his wife and just loved her. One night while I was there with Mac, the man died and I was asked to leave the room. As I was waiting outside the room, a nurse came and told me that the man’s wife wanted to talk to me. She wanted me to pray for her. Several days before this, a chaplain at the hospital had talked to me and shared how he believed everyone was going to heaven no matter what. I was horrified because I knew that there was only one way to God, through the cross and blood of Jesus. This woman didn’t want the chaplain to minister to her, she wanted me because she knew that I had the truth. I hope that the chaplain has finally seen the truth and has returned to the cross because it is the only true way to God. Mac needed surgery because of the blockage of his arteries and we were told that he would not survive without it. There was a short waiting period before he could have the surgery done, maybe about a week. He came home during this time to wait for the surgery. Mac had lost use of his right arm and his right foot dragged behind him as he walked. Physically he was not able to return to work. What were we going to do? He was worrying about finances, our ages, and what was going to happen with little Mary. We really needed God to manifest at this time. We just had to trust God. There was no income available, no retirement or pension available. It was a time when God was so faithful to show us that He was our provider. Before Mac had the stroke, we prayed that God would send us another child. We asked for one that would be a help and encouragement to us. We wanted one that would have a fine mind and be an exceptional child that we could enjoy. After Mac had the stroke, it seemed as if all hope was gone. But I knew that God was our hope and I knew that the hope was not gone. Things looked tough, because Mac couldn’t work. The devil was telling me that Mac was going to die, but the presence of God came and sustained me in that hour. Hope was burning in my heart and I had great expectations. I had a great God who could do all things. Mac went in the hospital to be operated on. The doctor told us that it was a crucial time and that it was possible that Mac would not make it. He said that Mac would be in intensive care for about ten days. Mac went through the operation fine and was placed in intensive care. By the second day the doctor told me, “I have to let that tiger out of there, that man is ready to go.” I asked the doctor if the surgery and stroke would have any bearing on us adopting another child. He said “No, it shouldn’t.” We didn’t get down because God had given us such faith to believe for another child. Mac did very well. God didn’t “retire” him, but He “re-fired” him. He learned how to write with his left hand and worked diligently for eleven more years. Before Monica left, a new lady attended the Bible study. Her name was Helen Elley. I didn’t know it that day, but she was going to become my lifelong friend and my prayer partner. She fulfilled the scripture that says, “If any two shall agree it will be done for you” (Mt 18:19). She asked for prayer that day because she had sold her home and her family was looking for a house to buy. She wanted prayer that God would show them a house to buy. It wasn’t long before God opened up a lovely home for Helen and her family that was only two streets over from my home. She became a wonderful friend and neighbor. Around this time, my brother Frank became ill and was in the hospital dying. We prayed and interceded. My prayer was that the Lord would not take him home until Frank was sure of his salvation. I knew that he was going to die, but I wanted to make sure he had Jesus. One night the Lord let me know that Frank had made his peace with God. I knew at that moment he had slipped over to the other side. We went home for his funeral. I will never forget the difference that I felt from Frank’s funeral and Mama’s and Daddy’s funerals. This time I had Jesus and I knew that Frank had Jesus. I knew where he was and that I would see him again. I went to the coffin to tell him good-bye and took his hand. God did a wonderful thing for me. Frank’s hand felt warm and God let me know that Frank was with Jesus. The Lord impressed me to have a prayer meeting. This was to be an open prayer meeting. It wasn’t just for my church, but for whoever wanted to come and pray. I shared the vision with a friend of mine, Ruby Callahan. She told me that it didn’t matter about the size of group. The important thing was to have people who were in one accord to come together and pray. The first meeting had two in attendance, Mary and me. I wasn’t discouraged, because I knew God was there. I had a phone call from a friend in California, Pam Mann. She had the first prayer request. After the first meeting, the numbers began to grow. The core group consisted of Helen, Barbara, Roz, Carleen, Mary and me. Carleen was the song leader for the group. We began to pray and God started to do some wonderful things. I prayed and told the Lord, “I will be the gatekeeper and open my home. You bring in those You want here. Bring in the hungry, needy and the maimed so that we can minister to them.” The Lord told me that it was going to be like boot camp. He would bring in those to train us and there would be enough love to cover everything. It was to be led by the Holy Spirit. One Valentine’s Day, God began to pour out the Father’s love in a tangible way at the prayer meeting. A new friend, Jane Parson, had come that day to visit. She said that she found what she was seeking--God’s love. As we held hands to pray, Jane said she noticed we had formed a perfect heart. The Spirit began to move through me and gave me this song. “Jesus, You are my Valentine” Jesus, you are my Valentine Sent from the Father’s heart to mine. Oh Jesus impart your love thru me, That others might receive the grace of Calvary. Oh Jesus, Oh blessed Valentine. Praise God, I am thine. God began to send in teachers to train us. He sent in Sister and Brother Martin. They were pastors, intercessors, and prophets. They became my spiritual parents. They taught us how to move in the Spirit, how to hear from God and how to intercede. I never knew who was coming to the prayer meeting. I prayed and fasted as I asked the Lord to send in those he wanted to attend. We had Byron and Elsie Hunter visit. They were missionaries from Mexico. It was so refreshing when they came and told what God was doing in Mexico. We adopted them as our missionaries to support in prayer. Later they moved to San Antonio to live and Elsie became a regular at the prayer meeting. She was a great help and inspiration. Some of the best meetings were when our friends Roy and Ruby were in town. They were traveling evangelists who went wherever God instructed them to go. Someone brought them to the prayer group and introduced us. I will never forget what a joy and blessing they were. Brother Roy had a gift of singing and he played a guitar. He would sing, “There’s a meeting today on the old campground” and we would have a regular campmeeting. People came from all over the city to attend the meetings. Roy and Ruby would stay in town for a month or until God instructed them to leave. They were such encouragers. They were the first people that I knew who believed in miracles. Right before they would leave, Roy always sang “Vias con Dios.” I would begin to cry because I knew it was time for them to go. Roy once told me that if I ever needed help to just cry out to the Father and He would let them know. One time they left and were on their way to Florida. They had been gone for about a week when the Lord spoke to them to turn around and return to San Antonio. God said, “Jean needs help.” In this case, the problem was with Mary. I’m not sure how it happened, but Mary had gotten a small hip fracture and was in great pain. The doctor said that she would have to lie perfectly still for a month or two. That same day, I heard a knock at the door and there stood Roy and Ruby. I couldn’t believe it. They said they had gotten all the way to Florida and the Lord sent them back. They came in, laid hands on Mary and God instantly healed her. All her pain left. We had wonderful times with this precious couple. As I began to grow in the Lord I wanted to tell Him how much I loved Him. I hungered and thirsted after Him so much. But I didn’t feel like I had the words to express it. One day as I was walking and talking to the Lord, I felt God’s presence in the room with me. At that moment I received what I call my prayer language. I heard myself singing to the tune of “Jesus Loves Me," but in a different language (Acts 2:4, 19:6). It was so wonderful to pray and sing in the Spirit. I felt so free as my spirit was set free to worship God in spirit and in truth (Jn 4:24). I also began to see things in the Bible in a new and different way. I had more revelation of His truths. I shared my experience with those at the prayer meeting. Others opened their hearts and began to receive this precious gift. Mary was about five years old when a certain minister came to visit the prayer group. He moved in the gifts of the Holy Spirit, particularly the gift of prophecy. Normally he ministered to large crowds and was in San Antonio holding meetings. I had the desire to have him come minister at my home prayer meeting. The Lord told me, “You have not because you ask not.” So I asked the Lord to send him. A friend of mine knew him and was going to his meeting that night. I asked her to give him a note inviting him to come to the prayer meeting. She told me that he would not be interested in coming; he only ministered to large groups. But I knew that this was a man of God and God could speak to his heart. At two o’clock on Thursday, he knocked at my door for the meeting. That day he prophesied to many people at the meeting, including myself. It was a confirmation of things that God had already been showing me. It was a wonderful meeting, but he never said anything to Mary. After he left, I said to the Lord, “I wish that he would have had a word for Mary.” A few months later, the minister called from Houston to tell me he was going to be in the area. He asked if I would like for him to come to the prayer meeting. I was thrilled. When he came, the first one he went to was Mary. He spoke directly to her. Many people spoke around her, but he was the first one who spoke directly to her. He called her by name and told her that God was well pleased with her and that He daily rejoiced over her. God said that she understood all that was going on around her because that which He had placed in the midst of her. But He had hidden it for a purpose. I rejoiced over the word. I do know that Mary understands more than we ever dreamed. She is aware of the Holy Spirit and the things of God. Later I was reading in a magazine about a young man who had extremely high IQ. Some scientists wanted to study his brain to try to understand more about how the human mind worked. When they did, they discovered to their surprise that he only had a brain stem. Again I realized that God works in mysterious ways. I believe that God has a purpose in all things and that He will totally heal Mary. Over the years, God has kept her and has been the lifter up of her head. He has been Mary’s all in all. I still believe that God will raise her up at His timing and we will see the manifestation of the fullness of her healing. I thank God for His Word. I believe in healing because the Word says it that “By His stripes we were healed.” We have a faithful God. God loved us so much that He sent His only Son to die for us. He certainly doesn’t bring destruction upon His children. I want to pause and praise Him for His goodness and mercy that endures forever. I praise Him in all things because it is the will of God in my life. It doesn’t mean to praise him for the bad things, but to praise Him in all circumstances. He makes us more than conquerors and turns all things around for our good and His glory. I praise Him for His little silent missionary who has had a mission for thirty-three years. In her silence, the sweetness of her smile and in her ability to wait patiently, I thank God. She had a prophecy spoken over her once that said, “In days to come, God would bring people to your side. They will come in weeping and will leave rejoicing because of the great victory that they will share in.” I have seen this manifested over and over. People come in burdened down. As they share their griefs, Mary lies there and smiles. The anointing comes and they begin to have the victory in their problems. God works in mysterious ways. Not as the world sees it, but God in his great omnipotent power and presence works all things for our good. Some time later I began to have physical problems. I had to go in for a hysterectomy. We wondered what were we going to do because we had Mary to care for. God sent in our niece, Patricia Wall. She came from Memphis to take care of Mary while I was in the hospital. Six months after my hysterectomy, God sent us another beautiful little girl baby. We named her Patricia Ann. What a joy she was (and still is). People just flocked to come to see Patricia Ann and we had so many come to help us. My friend Neil came and bathed her every morning. Helen, Edna, Bessie, and Maxine helped me with the two children because I needed the help badly. But through it all, I was so blessed. All heaven came down as God brightened our lives. Mary loved to hear Patricia Ann cry, not because she was crying, but because she enjoyed listening to her. Mary laughed as she listened to Patricia Ann. What buddies they were. Patricia Ann loved Mary as well. It was a wonderful, but busy time. Mac was determined to have the children in Sunday School and to take them to church. He said, “It is my responsibility to bring the children up in church.” Even though physically it was extremely difficult for Mac, we loaded the car up every Sunday and took the children to church. Patricia Ann went to children’s church. When she was about three or four, she would come home from church and preach what she had learned in church. God so filled her heart. I remember one day when she was about three, I bought her a little Bible and she learned to read from the Bible. One day she came in and asked me if I had ever asked Jesus into my heart. I told her yes and she told me, “Well I have too and He came into my heart.” I asked her when and she said just then sitting in the den on the couch. Even at that early age, I could tell a definite change in her behavior. She began to grow in the Lord. We had some records that told the stories of the Bible. They had the background music and sound to accompany the telling of the stories. She would listen to them every day and remembered all the stories. We began to have a children’s Bible study led by Helen. The neighborhood children came and Helen taught them the Bible stories. We sang songs and they especially loved that. The neighborhood children began to grow in the knowledge of the Lord. One day one of the neighborhood boys was hit by a car. Several of the other kids ran to the house and urged me to hurry to go pray for Joey. The little children knew that he needed to be prayed for. Joey went to the hospital, but came home all right. His mother told me later that while Joey was in the hospital, he kept singing the songs that he had learned at the Bible study. So it was wonderful to see the children grow and to feel the Spirit of the Lord in an anointed way in our home. I began learning how to follow the leading of the Spirit. The Spirit was teaching me how to hear His inner voice and how to be led by God’s Spirit. One day I had to go out to a part of town that I had never been in before. As I turned on the street, I saw a sign that said Garage Sale. I felt a quickening in my spirit but I thought, “I don’t need anything at a garage sale.” I also knew that I didn’t have time to stop because Mac was home taking care of the girls. As I drove on a little farther, I saw another garage sale sign. Right before I reached my destination, I saw a third large garage sale sign. Deep within me the Spirit said, “Turn here.” So I turned and pulled up in front of the house. I saw a woman in front of the house and she was walking with a cane. I thought, “Oh Lord, this must be you. I believe that you want me to pray for that lady.” The garage was near the back of the house so I walked down the gravel driveway. As I looked down, the lady had drawn a cross in the gravel with her cane. So I walked on back and looked at what she had for sale. The lady was sitting there with her little girl. There wasn’t very much out for sale and I questioned the Lord about what He wanted me to do. I began to talk to the lady and found out that her husband had died. She and the little girl were all alone. She didn’t know what she was going to do since she was crippled. I asked if I might pray for her. So I began to pray and the presence of the Lord came in that place. When the prayer was over, the lady began to weep and she said to the little girl, “I told you that God would send an angel and He did. I know things are going to be all right.” I wasn’t an angel, but I was a messenger. This had given the woman hope. I knew that the mission had been accomplished. To this day, I couldn’t tell you where the house was located, but I knew that I had had a divine appointment from the Lord. Another day, a man brought some furniture that I had ordered to the house. He had a large growth on his eye. As I looked at him I thought, “Oh that thing has to go.” I questioned him about it. He said that doctors had looked at it, but had not been able to treat it. It was really painful. I told him about the Lord Jesus and about how He died for us on the cross. I said that the stripes on His back were for the healing of our bodies. I asked him if I could pray for him and he said yes. I laid hands on his eye and rebuked the growth in the name of Jesus. I commanded the growth to leave. He thanked me and left. Some time later, the man had another delivery to make and I noticed that the growth was gone. He told me that it had disappeared. I praised God for His divine healing because the Word works. We just speak God’s Word under His anointing and believe it as we speak. Then the rest is up to God. We are His vessels. Another day I was going to the grocery store, the same one where I always shopped. But this time God directed me to turn in a different direction and go to another store down the street. I obeyed and went to the other store. As I went in I asked the Lord what He wanted me to do in this store. I looked and saw that bananas were on sale. I love bananas, so I thanked the Lord for the blessing of the bananas. I was over buying the bananas and a young woman was standing next to me. I looked at her and said, “Oh, isn’t this a wonderful buy. I just love bananas.” She said, “I used to like them, but I HAVE to eat them now. So I am losing my taste for them.” That quickened my spirit and I asked her why she had to eat bananas. She replied, “I have lupus and bananas are good for that.” I talked to her and found out that she was a Christian. I began to share with her about how God heals and I asked her if I could pray for her. I laid hands on her and prayed for her. The power of God hit and we began to rejoice in the Lord. I thanked God that He blessed me two ways. I was able to pray for the lady and I got a good deal on bananas. So many times we miss the blessings of God because we get into a rut. We go our own way and get in a set pattern. We don’t want to deviate from our routine. When God wants to do something, we have to hear His voice and walk with God. That way we are able to gather the blessings of God. As I began to seek the gifts of the Spirit, I read what Paul said, “I show you a more excellent way, the ministry of love” (1 Cor 13). I prayed and asked the Lord to give me the ministry of love. I didn’t realize then, but all the gifts operate by love. I believe that God bestowed a special love upon me at that time. It also says in the Word that Jesus is the Rose of Sharon. I thought how lovely and beautiful that was. So I began to claim that Jesus was the Rose of San Antonio. We had bumper stickers and little cards printed that proclaimed him as the “Rose of San Antonio.” We also began praying for a city-wide revival. We sent out pamphlets to all the churches in the city on how to have a revival. It wasn’t just about how to set up a revival meeting. It told how you must die to self and get right with God in order to let Him use you. We didn’t put our names on the pamphlet. We just asked them to come in agreement that we would have a city-wide revival. I prayed intently and studied books on revivals that had occurred throughout history. The prayer group and I hungered and desired to see this take place in our city. One night I didn’t have anything for dinner, so I told Mac that I was going to run down to the corner grocery store to get food for dinner. I had on a red cotton housedress and had my freshly washed hair tied up in a turban. I was just a plain old vanilla housewife that no one would take a second look at. They probably thought that I was someone’s housemaid. As I walked into the store, the Spirit of the Lord began to move in me as I felt the presence of the Lord so strong. The first person I passed was a man sitting on a stool next to the cosmetic counter. I said, “Hello sir, how are you doing?” He said, “I’m just sitting here waiting to die.” That came out of his spirit. I began to tell him about Jesus. I asked him if he ever had a relationship with Jesus. His eyes sparkled and he looked at me and said, “Yes, yes, I did once. Back during World War I. I sure did.” I shared with him about Jesus and the man’s spirit just came alive. I could tell that God had reassured him of his salvation. As I went on past the man, I passed other people and the Lord spoke to me things to say to different people. I began to witness and in a soft way I shared Jesus with people. A woman came to me and said, “I heard you back there talking to that lady about Jesus. I am so under conviction. I have been a Christian for many years and I have never shared Jesus with anyone. Would you pray for me?” So I prayed for her to be more bold with her witness. As I went around the corner, I saw a man looking bewildered. I asked him, “If you should die tonight, would you go to heaven?” I heard a voice come from him say, “Leave me alone, leave me alone.” I knew that it wasn’t his voice. His wife was standing a ways off and as I looked at her, I could tell that she was intently praying. So I shared Jesus with him. I knew that the voice I heard was an evil spirit that God wanted to deliver him from. As I continued shopping, I saw a woman. She grabbed me and said, “Would you pray for me? I have a smoking habit and I can’t seem to give it up.” She threw down her cigarettes and stomped them. “Please pray that I will be delivered from smoking.” I prayed with her for deliverance. This just kept going on and on, with one witness after another. I said, “Lord, I have got to get home and cook dinner.” I knew it wasn’t my flesh wanting attention, but that it was God’s Spirit compelling me to be a witness. I had prayed for an all out revival and now the Holy Spirit was moving mightily in that grocery store. As I started for the checkout counter, I looked up and saw two young men coming in the front door. I didn’t think anything about it, because I was home free and ready to make it out the door. Just then, one of the young men headed my way. So I asked him, “Sir, do you know Jesus? If you should die tonight, would you make heaven?” He said, “I have been crying out all day long, how do I get saved? Please tell me.” So I told him about Jesus and he wanted to invite Jesus into his heart. So we knelt down by the vegetable counter and he asked the Lord to come into his heart. People were all around us, but God put us into a bubble. When he got up I said, “Go get your friend.” He said, “I am.” So as I checked out, I sighed thinking that I was free. I had been gone way over an hour and I knew the family was waiting for supper. As I went to my car, I looked up and saw a man running across the parking lot yelling, “Wait, wait, wait.” He ran up to me and looked at me. He was startled and said, “Oh, I thought you were someone else.” The Lord said to me, “Get him.” So I asked him, “If you should die tonight, would you make heaven?” Out of his spirit he said, “Yes, I would. Because of my good works.” I replied, “The Lord says that your good works are as filthy rags. It is the blood of Jesus that gets you into heaven” (Is 64:6). I shared the gospel and the man just looked stunned. This phenomenon went on for three days. Every time I went out on an errand, God would move. When I went to the mall, He would say, “Get that one, get this one.” At one store when I went to the counter to buy something, I began sharing Jesus with the young store clerk. He said, “This is the first time I have ever heard that.” He heard it by the Spirit and he wanted Jesus. The Lord let me experience an atmosphere of revival. We don’t have to set aside a specific time to go witnessing. Every day is an opportunity to witness, if we will stay in tune with God and be willing to follow His leading. God moved in our neighborhood as well. We had a wonderful neighborhood family. When one hurt, we all seemed to know and to reach out with love. The Luttmans, Pasterchicks, Lawsons, Touchstones and Counts were precious neighbors. I long to be in another neighborhood where neighbors love and care for one another. After more than thirty years, we can still get together and pick up where we left off. I especially want to mention Tim. He was such a blessing. Tim had a disease that affected his body, but not his mind. He had trouble talking, but he was extremely intelligent. He would come to the house in his electric wheelchair and call for me from the sidewalk. Then I would go out and talk to Tim. One day he told me he felt as if he was going to go bananas. So I prayed that he wouldn’t go bananas and we got to laughing. Tim loved God and was such an inspiration to the entire neighborhood. I rejoice that in heaven we will all be together again around the throne. The Dunlaps were our neighbors to the back of us. Mrs. Dunlap had the most beautiful flowers and she often gave me flowers over the back fence. She had a hot house for her flowers. The Dunlaps were older than Mac and me. One day Mrs. Dunlap became sick and had to go to the hospital. The Lord told me to go see Mrs. Dunlap and pray Psalm 91 over her. When I got there, to my surprise, I found the family there. Mrs. Dunlap was unconscious and not expected to live through the night. I was puzzled as to why the Lord would send me. So I went ahead and asked if they would mind if I read Psalm 91 to her. They let me go in and I read to her. I put her name into the Psalm as I read it, especially the part that said you will have a long, prosperous life. The next morning I saw a light on in the Dunlap’s house, so I called. It was their son. He had just flown in from New York. I asked how his mother was doing. He said, “You just won’t believe it, mother sat up in bed and wanted breakfast.” Mrs. Dunlap came home, lived for another three years and completed the course God had lain out for her. Even though she had been unconscious, her spirit heard the Word. The Word took effect in her heart and God raised her back up. All God requires of us is a simple act of obedience and He will do the rest. Edna and Harry lived about five streets down from us. I don’t know what we would have done without them. Edna did most of the sewing for the girls, which was wonderful since I didn’t know how to sew. She made the sweetest things. Every change of season, she went through their closets and made sure they had enough clothes. Many times on Saturday nights, they came over for dinner. Often they fixed Mac and me a steak dinner. I can’t even begin to record the things that they did for us. Great will be Edna’s reward in heaven because of her kindnesses toward us. She has gone on to be with the Lord, but I know that one day we will be rejoicing with her in heaven. She was such a wonderful woman. Harry, God’s handy man, is still with us doing his helpful work. Some special friends that I want to mention are Chaplain and Alma Barnett. Alma was so faithful to come and visit Mary every week. She loved to play the piano and sing for us. She came by especially to sing for Mary and she sang songs about Jesus. She was so devoted to Mary and always brought such joy to Mary. Alma is a woman of great wisdom and has many times helped me in my walk with Jesus. She has helped me in understanding what God was doing. One time I was praying for one of the neighbors who was in the hospital. I just knew that God was going to raise him up. I was fasting and praying Psalm 91 over him. I felt an urgency to go to the hospital to pray for him, so I called his house. They told me he had just died. I was really in shock because I just knew that the Lord was going to raise him up. I wondered where the body was located, because I thought maybe the Lord wanted me to go and raise him from the dead. I didn’t know what God wanted me to do. Later I talked to his wife. I told her how I had been praying the Psalm 91 over him and had wanted to go and pray for him. His wife said that it was his favorite Psalm. She said right before he went home to be with God, he began to smile and sing praises to God. As I shared this with Alma, she said that God privileged me to stand with this man until he crossed over into glory. Since then, I have stood with many as they crossed over. The last great battle and victory is the one over death. Another wonderful friend of mine is Joyce. I had met her when someone brought her to the house. She is a converted Jew and such an intercessor. She began to intercede for my family and has been faithful for all these years. Helen, Joyce and I have been a threefold cord. We have joined together in prayer believing God for marvelous things. Joyce always took whatever the Lord showed her and did it. One time I had a special visitation from the Lord. I knew what He was doing, but I knew that everyone else thought I had flipped. The strain had been so great. Many people were looking to me, believing that I was more mature than I was. God knew where I was in the Spirit and that I just had childlike faith. Many were calling and coming for prayer. I also had the children and Mac to care for. God wanted to give me a time of refreshing and told me to go play with the little children. So I just quit ministering to the older people and went out to play with the children. I went outside and played with Patricia Ann and the other kids in the neighborhood. Normally I didn’t have time to play with them, because of my duties. No one really understood it except Joyce. Joyce knew that it was a special refreshing time from the Lord. One day, she came and knocked at the door. She said she was there in obedience to the Lord. He wanted her to anoint my head with oil. She took an entire bottle of anointing oil and poured it on my head and said, “I anoint you in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.” Mac was standing there watching. Mac didn’t always understand what was going on, but when God was moving he never questioned it. Later on, Joyce told me she looked at Mac. She said that he looked surprised, but that he never said a word. Later that day, Patricia Ann came to me and wanted me to pour oil on her head and anoint her. It was during that time that God revealed himself in a sweet way. It was a time of refreshing and of rest. He wanted me to give all my burdens to him because they were heavy. It was a time for Jesus and me to come apart and rest together. Others finally saw that it was truly a supernatural visitation from God. I praise God that Joyce had stood with me and she knew and understood. As I grew in the Lord, I discovered promises in the Bible. I said, “If people in the Bible could do miracles, then I can believe for miracles now.” At that time, Mac had given up cigarettes, but instead turned to cigars. He would light a cigar and then leave it burning all day in an ashtray in his bathroom. He just couldn’t seem to lay them down. It seemed like on every prayer meeting day, the smoke would always find its way to the front of the house. I told Joyce about my desire for God to deliver Mac from smoking. She saw in the Bible where they anointed prayer cloths (Acts 19:12). She and I anointed a cloth with oil and put it under his pillow. We asked God to deliver him from a spirit of tobacco. The next day, Mac began to have symptoms of a stroke. He felt like he was dying and started to tell me about what type of life insurance he had, just in case he died. He was rushed to the hospital. The doctor told me later that as he had Mac on the table checking him, all of a sudden Mac let out a scream. The doctor said, “It scared the hell out of me!” The doctor said he found nothing wrong with Mac. Everything was normal. I went to visit Mac in his room. The first thing he said was, “I don’t know how, but I don’t want to smoke!” He just kept repeating how amazed that he was that he just didn’t have any desire to smoke. I didn’t tell him about the anointed cloth. I wasn’t sure that he would understand. So I just began to praise the Lord for Mac’s deliverance. I’m sorry to say, that when Mac came home, he did light up the cigars again a few times. But God had delivered him from that spirit and Mac did have victory over smoking. I praise God that the Word really works. We have to speak it and act on it, then God will bring it forth. One marvelous day, the presence of the Lord was so evident in our home. I was at the breakfast table and had called Patricia Ann to eat. She looked into the den and said, “Oh, good morning.” She pulled up another chair to the table. I asked her what she was doing and she said that Jesus was coming to breakfast with us. I asked her, “Where is He?” She said He was sitting in the den. Patricia Ann said, “Come on in Jesus and have breakfast with us.” The presence of the Lord just flooded the kitchen. It just stayed in the house all day. People began calling on the phone wanting to know what was going on. People began to drop by. As they walked in the house, they would kneel because they felt God’s presence so strong. It was such a wonderful, beautiful day. Oh how I wish for more days like that. Adults miss by not listening to children because children’s hearts and minds are pure. Children are able to see God and God is able to speak to them because they believe. The Bible says that except we receive as little children we will not be able to enter the Kingdom of God (Mt 18:3). There was another day that I remember vividly. Patricia Ann came to me from the back of the house. She said, “Jesus came back to my bedroom. Who hurt his hands? He showed me his hands and they were hurt.” Patricia Ann saw His nail pierced hands. I knew that Jesus had really been in our home that day. God was honored in our home. Every year, Mac would drag his feet about putting up the Christmas tree. One Christmas around the December 2nd, I saw him running and pulling out all of the Christmas decorations. I asked him what he was doing. He said he was going to put the tree up. Patricia Ann came to me later and told me that she had told Daddy to put up the tree. She said that she had seen Jesus out in the yard and he told her to tell Daddy to put the Christmas tree up. So Mac entered into the spirit of Christmas that year like a little child. Every Christmas we threw a birthday party for Jesus. We had a big cake and invited adults and children to come. We sang to the Lord and magnified Him. We told Him how much we loved him because of His great love for us. Because of the way I was raised, I am a firm believer in discipline. Proverbs says to spare the rod is to spoil the child (Prov 22:15). So I believe that spankings are one form of discipline. It’s not the only one, but it is an important one. As a kid, I would feel meanness come on me and Mama would say, “Well young lady, you are asking for it.” After a spanking, I would be good for a long time. One day mother had said something to me and I didn’t obey her. I ran from her instead. She was going to spank me. Our house was up off the ground and I ran up under the house to hide. I don’t know how long I stayed under there, but mother passed by to hang some clothes on the clothesline. She didn’t look my way, but I heard her say, “That’s all right young lady, I’ll get you when you come out.” I stayed under there as long as I could stand it and finally thought, “I must face the music.” Mother always used a thin switch on us and it didn’t take much to make us dance because those little ones hurt. So I reasoned that I would get my own switch this time. I went out to the peach orchard and decided that I was going to get a big one, because the big ones didn’t hurt like the little ones. So I came up to the house dragging a great, big limb that had fallen off one of the trees. Mama later told me that when she saw me she got so tickled, but she went on and took a little switch off the branch and spanked me. Well, that remained in my mind as I was bringing up little Patricia Ann. She had a strong will and a mind of her own. So I pondered how to break her rebellion, but not her spirit. I would get a switch and put it on top of the refrigerator. The fear of God would fall on her and she would beg me to please take it out and get rid of it. I praise God that the Word works and correction works. We had so many wonderful times. Every day was a holiday to us because we loved Jesus. One day when Patricia Ann was in kindergarten, I saw her with a brown paper sack in her hands. I asked her what she had in the sack. She said that it was her Bible. I wanted to know why she had it in a sack. She told me that it was show-n-tell at school and she wanted to hide it until she could show it to them. When she came home, she told me how she had shown them the scripture that says, “Keep your mouth shut and you’ll stay out of trouble.” I asked what they said. She said that the teacher just smiled and all the kids just looked at me and said “Huh?” Patricia Ann knew the Word and took it very seriously. One day she came in very distressed. She told me that some of the kids had brought a Ouija Board to school. My nephew, Steve, was living with us at that time. He went with Patricia Ann to the school and explained the Word to them about how a Ouija Board was not of God. It was a Christian school, so they made the kids take the board home. Patricia Ann learned the Word early and she loved the Word. I praise God that even today she loves the Word and the truth of the Word. She is like the Bereans in Acts who searched the Word diligently to get the whole counsel of God. I’m so grateful that the Word is dwelling in her and manifesting life within her. Because of this she is able to teach others. At one point, one of Mary’s doctors told us, “No judge in his right mind will allow you to adopt her.” So that put fear into Mac and me that we might lose her. We didn’t proceed any further into the adoption until seven years later. She was in our custody, but was not legally ours because the adoption had not been completed. We wanted her to have the same legal rights as Patricia Ann. A wonderful Christian friend, Pat Grant, was a lawyer. We shared with her about Mary. Right before Christmas, Mac told Pat that he wanted the adoption finalized for his Christmas present. Pat went to work on it. Ordinarily, it was a long drawn out procedure, but Pat was able to get a social worker to come out to the house on her own time. Things moved quickly. I never will forget the day that she took me into the judge’s chamber. I felt as if we were walking into that courtroom with Jesus at our sides. The judge read the papers and granted the adoption, just like that. God came through and answered our prayers. I told Pat how my heart was dancing just like a cartoon dog. Pat had one of her friends draw a picture of a dancing dog and she gave it to me. When mother had died years earlier, I let a spirit of grief come into my life. I grieved so much when she died and was still grieving many years after her death. Joanna came over to see me one day. She had a beautiful voice and often came to sing for Mary and me. On this particular day as she began to sing, I started to weep. She was singing “As a Babe Cries for its Mother.” God showed me that I had a spirit of grief for my mother and He wanted to deliver me from it. The grief had come in when my mother died. I recognized it and said, “Spirit of grief, I command you to leave in the name of Jesus. Jesus has born our griefs and our sorrows” (Is 53:4). The spirit left me. I was totally free after years of holding on to the grief. God is our deliverer and He has a time and way for His deliverance. Now the memory of my mother is so sweet and there is no grief. There is only great happiness and great expectation in knowing that someday we will be together again. Mac had thirty years in the civil service, so he planned to retire. It was about two months before his death. At that time we were going to an Assembly of God church. A friend from the church wanted me to take Mary to a little Pentecostal church. She said that there was such an anointing at the church and the power of God was very strong to heal. I told her that I would ask Mac and see if it was okay with him. Mac was very careful about taking Mary to new places. Mac agreed to go and was even looking forward to going. So I knew that it was the Spirit urging us to take Mary to this church. The entire family attended that night. The church was very joyful and quite exuberant in the Lord. Mac enjoyed part of it, but I guess it became too loud for him. So he got up and left to wait outside. I look to the Lord in that because it gave Him freedom to work. The people began to come toward Mary and so I pushed her down front for prayer. The anointing of God hit. No one laid hands on me; they were all praying for Mary. The next thing that I knew, I was lying on the floor. I heard a woman shouting, “Glory, glory, glory.” All of a sudden, I realized that it was me shouting. God gave me a glory shout. The Bible says that it is the shout of a king heard in their midst. God did this to a quiet, little Methodist girl. I used to sit in church and not sing because I was afraid someone might hear me. God freed my spirit by giving me this glory shout. Little did I know that he was preparing me for Mac’s home going. Chapter 7 Heaven Bound The Lord often spoke to me in dreams. He gave me a dream not too long before Mac died. In the dream God came to me and spoke, “Jean, Mac’s house is almost complete. There is just a little more work.” I replied, “Yes Lord, I know.” I knew by the Spirit that God was getting ready to take Mac home, because his work was completed. Regardless of what is left on earth, when one’s work is complete, it is time for the person to go on to heaven. Also, God always makes a way for those left behind. Every summer we always went home to Mississippi for our vacation. We began to prepare for our trip. Unbeknown to me, Mac had his papers about his burial plot in his suitcase. We had purchased a burial plot in Memphis years earlier and Mac thought that he was going to die on this trip. He didn’t express it to me, but I just knew it by what he had done. Patricia Ann had made him a little camel at Sunday School and he had that camel with him as well. When I saw it, I knew that God had spoken to him that he would be traveling home. While we were in Mississippi, I prayed and interceded for him. It was a pleasant vacation for Mac and the children. While there, he came to me and showed me a magazine with pictures of Richmond, Virginia in it. He said, “I want you to take the children there.” Mac had grown up in Richmond and wanted the children to see it, but he knew that he wasn’t going to be able to take them there himself. On this trip to Mississippi, we were comforting Ann. Her husband Woody had gone on to be with the Lord about a year or so prior to this trip. Nanny, Woody’s mother, was there with Ann at that time. I spent a lot of time in prayer for Ann because it was a very hard time for her. Ann and Woody had been married a long time and there was such a closeness between them. We asked Ann to fly back to San Antonio with us, thinking that it would help her to get away for a little while. So she agreed to come with us. Little did I know that God had ordained her trip, so that she would be there for me. She got some of her deliverance from grief by ministering to me during Mac’s death. We got back home on a Sunday. Mac was so glad to get home. He loved the Dallas Cowboys and he was going to watch one of their games that night. The next day, he seemed to be up and around with new life in him. I looked at him and wondered what had happened to him. He looked so wonderful. He straightened all of his things. He was making preparation to die, but I didn’t know that. Ann and I went out to see a friend and all of a sudden I got a prompting of the Spirit to go home. So I told Ann, “We must go.” When I got home, there was the ambulance in front of our house. Our neighbors, Maxine and Big George came running out to meet me. Harry and Edna were also there. Big George told me Mac had died. I went in to see him. Mac had been standing by a window and his body had just crumpled down by that window. Sad to say, Patricia Ann was the one who had found him. She told me, “I hadn’t heard from Daddy in a while and I went to see about him.” After she found him she ran next door to get Maxine. I remember the presence of the Lord being present to sustain us. We were sitting in the living room waiting for the ambulance people to take Mac and we heard the door open. There wasn’t anyone there. All of a sudden I felt a hand on my shoulder and I knew that it was the presence of the Lord with me. He took me up to a place in the Spirit and kept me in His presence as we worked out all the details. I found out that a funeral home had just been built right across the expressway from us. Mac’s funeral was the first one held there. I thanked the Lord that He made everything so convenient. It was a beautiful service. All my Christian friends who loved us and loved the Lord were there. It wasn’t a sorrowful service, but a joyful service. I asked the Lord to let the joy of knowing that Mac had made it home surpass my sorrow. It was the only way that I could bear it. So God did it and pulled me up into His presence. God always makes a way of escape. He will either walk you through a situation or take you out of it. In this case, he walked me through it. Mike, Mac’s son flew in for the funeral. He was such a comfort to his sisters and me during this time. It was very hard on Mike, because it had been a while since he had seen his dad. Carleen led us in singing praises to God. The minister preached on the second coming of the Lord. Another friend Joanna sang “The King is Coming.” I remember looking down at Mac and thinking that he had made it home. The funeral director told me that every service should be like Mac’s, because it was such a beautiful, joyful service. When a loved one has Jesus, death can be a joyful time because you know that you will see your loved one again in heaven. It is a sorrowful event when a person doesn’t know Jesus and goes out into eternity lost. Patricia Ann, Mike and I flew to Memphis for Mac’s burial. Mary stayed in San Antonio with Edna and Harry. We had a second funeral with all of my family. My nephews were the pall bearers. Sandra, my niece, sang “Precious Memories.” It was the first time she had sung in public. My nephew Frank, a minister, held the service. It was so sweet and again I felt God’s presence. Patricia Ann put the camel that she had made in Sunday School in her daddy’s pocket. I wrote him a note saying that I would see him inside the Eastern Gate. I also put some bubble gum in his pocket. I didn’t want the children to be fearful of death, so I showed them the gum and said, “He’s gone to be with Jesus and the bubble gum is for Jesus.” On the way back to San Antonio, I looked at little Patricia Ann sitting on the plane. She was eight at the time. She was holding a bouquet of daisies that she had taken from the funeral. I thought to myself, “Lord, who would know that this little sweetheart was just returning from her father’s funeral.” I knew His presence was sustaining her. It was a hard time for her. Weeks later, she called me to her room and told me about how Jesus had raised people from the dead. “Couldn’t God let my Daddy come back just long enough for me to tell him that I love him and to tell him good-bye.” I didn’t have words to answer. I prayed and asked for a supernatural miracle in her heart to make things right and to comfort her. God answered and she never mentioned it again. She talked about her Daddy, but it wasn’t in that tone of sorrow and sadness. God answers prayers! Our dog Princess had died years earlier. She had been like our child since we had had no children of our own. I was so sad. I asked my friend Ruth if Princess would be in heaven. She told me that if that was what it took for me to be happy, Princess would be in heaven. She showed me in the Bible that there were animals in heaven and that heaven was a real place. It said that the lion would lie down with the lamb. After Mac went home to be with the Lord, I was lying down resting and I saw a vision. I saw Mac and Princess walking down this long corridor together. I knew with all my heart that Princess and Mac were in heaven together. Chapter 8 Victory in All Things After Mac’s death I began to think about what we were going to do. I was left with the two children, but I also had Jesus. I thought that it would be hard with just us living in San Antonio and I felt as if I needed someone to help. I just didn’t know who. At that time, my young nephew Steve McClatchy talked to me. He was teaching school and shared with me that he wished he had more of the Word. He was a fairly new Christian. I asked him if he was interested in taking some Bible courses. I thought maybe he might want to take some correspondence courses and I wanted to financially help him take some classes. But Steve wanted to go to Bible school. So I asked him where he wanted to go. He mentioned a school and I then remembered that there was a Bible school in San Antonio, International Bible College. I mentioned it to Steve and he decided he wanted to go to school there. Steve had visited us while Mac was alive. He received his prayer language and was really blessed by the Lord while he was with us. He was such a blessing to us at that time. He helped Mac with the car and he painted the house. Mac told me, “That boy sure is a blessing.” Little did I know how much of a blessing Steve was until after he came to live with us for two years. Steve so ministered to Mary, Patricia Ann, and me. Steve really grew in the Lord while he was with us. He used to laugh and say that he heard preaching twice a day. He went to school and heard it and then he came home and heard it from me. We were praying fervently for a revival in San Antonio. I wasn’t able to get out much, so I asked the Lord to send people to my door so I could tell them about the Lord. One day I looked out the door and saw all these cars coming down our street. Usually our street was very quiet, with very little traffic. On this day, there were lines of cars up and down the street. There was a gas shortage in the nation at that time. A gas station around the corner was giving away free gas, so people were waiting in line to get gas. I said, “Oh Steve, here’s our chance. Let’s get our witness of Jesus out.” A few weeks earlier, my next door neighbor, Oscar Lawson, came to me in tears. He had found a letter lying on the street in front of a music store. He said when he read it, he began to weep. We never found out the author of the letter, but we felt that God had given it to us to share his love with other people. We had copies of this letter made up to distribute as witnessing tool. It was the perfect time to pass out the letter. I gave Steve a stack of the letters and told him to go bring in the sheep. He went to every car up and down the street handing out the letters and witnessing. “Letter to a Friend” Dear One: How are you? I just had to send a note to tell you how much I love and care about you. I saw you yesterday as you were talking to your friends. I waited all day, hoping you would want to talk with me, also. As evening drew near, I gave you a sunset to close your day and a cool breeze to rest you and I waited and waited. You never came. Oh, yes, it hurts me--but I still love you because I am your friend. I saw you fall asleep last night and longed to touch your brow, so I spilled moonlight upon your pillow and face. Again I waited, wanting to rush down so we could talk. I have so many gifts for you! You awakened late and rushed off to work. My tears were in rain. Today you look so sad--so all alone. It makes my heart ache because I understand. My friends let me down and hurt me many times too, but I love you! If you would only listen to me. I love you!! I try to tell you in the blue sky and in the quiet green grass. I whisper it in the leaves on the trees and breathe it in the colors of flowers. I shout it to you in mountain streams and give the birds love songs to sing. I clothe you with warm sunshine and perfume the air with nature scents. My love for you is deeper than the oceans and bigger than the biggest want or need in your heart. If you only knew how much I want to walk and talk with you. We could spend an eternity together in heaven. I know how hard it is on the earth, I lived there myself. I really know. And I want to help you. I want you to meet my Father. He wants to help too. He is that way--you know, just call me. I have so much to share. Okay, I won’t hassle you any further. You are free to choose me or reject me. It is your decision. I have chosen you, and because of this I will wait--because I love you. Your friend, Jesus Steve brought a lot of healing in the house with his sweetness and kindness. He was very good with the girls. The neighborhood kids loved him too. They would ask Steve to come play with them and he would take them up to the park to play. He was a dedicated Christian man and still is to this day. Steve stayed with the girls sometimes and I was able to get out of the house for a few hours. Sometimes I went to the hospital to pray for the sick or for visitation. One day I was going to see a friend in the hospital. As I left that day, I saw one of the neighborhood boys out playing. He hollered at me and said, “Jean, did you know my brother Ralph was in the hospital? He might die.” I asked what was wrong with him. He said that Ralph had a high fever, hepatitis, and a hole in his heart. I told him that I would go visit Ralph. After I visited my friend, I went over to the hospital where Ralph was. As I walked in, Ralph was so glad to see me. I asked him, “Ralph, do you believe in miracles?” He said, “Yes! I believe in miracles. God has healed me before.” So I said to him, “Jesus sent me to pray for you.” I began to pray and rebuke the spirit of fever. I commanded healing to come in Jesus’ name. I spoke healing for his heart. Then I looked over at the other bed in the room. There was a young Jewish boy about sixteen years old in the bed. I asked him if I could pray for him and he said yes. So I went over to his bed and first shared with him about Jesus and salvation. Then I began to pray salvation and healing for him. The next thing I knew, Ralph began to shout, “He’s here, he’s here, he’s here.” The presence of God filled that room. I went on home after that. About three days later I looked down the street and saw Ralph working on his car. I called out to him and said, “Ralph, what are you doing home?” He said, “God healed me. After you left, my fever broke and they sent me home.” He also told me about the boy in the room with him. After I prayed and left the room, the boy got up and walked. He had been told that he would never walk again. He got up and walked and they let him go home the next day. I praise God for His healing power and His Holy Spirit. If we will just step out and obey Him, the anointing will flow. It will break the yoke off others. It is the anointing that destroys the yoke. Another time I invited a young man and his family who were from Saudi Arabia to dinner. We had met through a mutual friend. He was at one of the air force bases doing some type of training. The friend led him to the Lord and she brought him to one of the prayer meetings. We were so excited about having them as guests. Steve unbeknown to me had asked a Jewish friend to dinner that same night. He was a Christian Jew who loved to compose and sing psalms to the Lord. So when the Jewish man arrived and found out about the other guests he said, “Oh, I’m Jewish and the Saudi Arabians don’t like us. I don’t know what he will think.” But I knew that God had arranged it and that the love of God would be present. So when the Saudi Arabian family arrived, it was such a beautiful time. The man spoke English. His wife and children didn’t speak English, but they were so sweet. The Jewish man brought his guitar and sang. The anointing and love of God filled the house. It was a wonderful time. Later on after the Saudi Arabian family left San Antonio, I received a letter from them. He thanked me and said that our home was the first one in America that he had ever been invited into. He sent us gifts and thanked us for our hospitality. So it is not always necessary to go to foreign countries to reach other nations and cultures. Sometimes they are right in our own backyard. A friend once told me a story that really impacted my life. It was about a businessman who was expecting the Lord to visit him on a certain day. So he began to look for the Lord. The first person who came was a little boy. He needed help with something, but the man told him that he was too busy because he was waiting on the Lord to visit. The next visitor was an old woman. Again he was too busy to help because the Lord was coming that day. One other person came that day, but once again the man was too busy waiting on the Lord. So at the end of the day when he had closed shop, he sat down and said, “Lord I thought you spoke to me that you were coming today.” The Spirit of the Lord replied, “I did come. I came first in the little boy, but you were too busy. Then I came in the old woman, but again you were too busy. I came to you in many different forms, but you were always too busy.” After I heard this story, the fear (reverence) of the Lord fell on me. I said, “Oh Lord, I’m going to be watching for you. Regardless of who you send or how that person comes, I don’t ever want to be too busy.” So after that revelation, I began to be alert in the Spirit. Shortly later, my next door neighbor Chris came over. He was selling raffle tickets for his church. He asked if I would I buy a ticket. I looked and told him, “Honey, I only have a quarter.” He said that was enough to buy one ticket. Then I forgot about it. On Mother’s Day the priest from the church called and told me that I had won a boy’s ten speed bike. I was thrilled. Patricia Ann had a new bike, so I knew that it wasn’t for her. All the neighborhood kids had to come in to look at the bike and try it out. A few days after that, my friend Pam and her husband Jeff brought a ten year old boy over to the house. He lived in the same apartment community as they did. They had been ministering to him. He didn’t have any parents and he lived with his grandmother. When he walked in, I knew the bike was for him. Jesus had just walked in my house. I looked at Patricia Ann and she nodded her head. She said, “The bike is for him.” We gave the boy the bike and he just didn’t know what to say. We let him know it was from Jesus. So he took the bike home and showed it to his grandmother. She was very upset at first because she thought that he had stolen it from somewhere. Pam and Jeff reassured her that the bike was a gift from the Lord. I just praised God and said, “Well Lord, I saw you that time.” I continued to stay alert for more opportunities. Sometime later, I looked out the window and saw an older lady walking hurriedly down the street. She had on a housecoat and bedroom slippers. My next door neighbor George saw her too. He later told me he said to himself, “I bet that lady is heading for Aunt Jean’s.” Sure enough, she came up to door and rang the doorbell. As I opened the door, the lady said, “Oh, I thought I would never get here.” So I welcomed her into the house and sat her down at the kitchen table. She saw Mary and Patricia Ann and thought that they were her grandchildren and just talked to them. She thought she was at home. I began to think, “Lord, I believe that this lady has walked away from the nursing home.” There was a nursing home around the corner on the next street. It was right off the expressway. Bubba was over painting our den. I asked him to run home and have his dad call the nursing home to see if they were missing anyone. While he was gone, I asked the lady to have a tea party with me. So we had tea and cookies. We had a great time. We also sang some of the old hymns. Oh what a time she was having. Bubba came back and said that, yes, a woman was missing. They were frantically looking for her. The nursing home personnel said that they would come get her. I told him to go back and tell them that I would take her back. After our party, we gave her some gifts. I said, “Darling, do you think it is about time that we go back?” She said okay, so we got in the car and I drove her to the nursing home. On the way there, we sang, “Jesus loves me, this I know. For the Bible tells me so.” We were having such a great time. As I turned the corner I saw two attendants outside looking for her. I thought, “Oh Lord, she’s having such a good time.” So I took her around the block one more time. I drove right on by the nursing home and we kept on singing as we circled the block again. The second time around, I pulled up into the parking lot. She said, “Thank you. I had a great time.” The attendants came to the car and took her in the nursing home. I just chuckled and said, “Lord, I knew it was you. I was alert and I saw you.” So from then on, I always tried to be alert to whoever came to my door or across my path. We never know when we might entertain angels unaware. I remember another story concerning angels. My nephew and niece, David and Carol, came to visit us. They attended one of my Thursday prayer meetings. We had a wonderful meeting. It was a good time where God blessed us all. Later on, they both asked me who was the little man sitting on the floor in the corner. They said he was dressed in white and a turban, sitting with his legs and arms crossed. I said, “We’ve never had anyone like that at the meeting.” They responded, “Well, he was there. He never said a word.” I checked with others who were at the meeting and no one saw anyone like that. The Lord let me know that it was the angel that He had assigned to us. Before this, I had received a word that God had assigned an angel over the meeting and over my home. God was always doing wonderful favors for me. They were little things, but they were things I needed. One day I had raked the yard and was putting the leaves in bags. I ran out of bags. I said, “Oh Lord, I need more bags.” So I made a note that I would try to get to the store and buy some. When the garbage men came that day, I looked out the window and couldn’t believe what I was seeing. The garbage men were taking the black bags, opening them and pouring the leaves into the truck. Then they laid the bags back on the ground. There were at least ten to fifteen bags that they did that way. They left the bags and I said, “Thank you Lord.” Another day, I was out of milk. I said, “Lord, I need a gallon of milk and I need a dollar to get the milk.” Milk was only a dollar a gallon back then. So when the mail came, there was a letter from my dear sister Mabel. In the letter she had put in a dollar. I called and told her she was an answer to prayer. I told her that God would more than bless her back. Another time, we were going to have our missionary friends, the Hunters, stay with us. I had an upright freezer that I kept stocked with meat and things from a frozen food company. My freezer was empty, so I knew it was time to have it filled. I bought an entire freezer full of meat in preparation for our company. Right before they came, things began to happen. First the stove broke and we had to have that repaired. Then a couple of other things broke and had to be fixed. Finally, the freezer quit working. I said, “Lord, I just can’t believe it. I prayed about getting the food and now the freezer is not working.” I called the company where I had bought it and a man came out to check it. He said the compressor had gone out on it and couldn’t be fixed. We would have to buy a new compressor. That would have cost almost as much as getting a new freezer. I prayed for direction and found out my next door neighbor’s freezer was empty. So I put all my meat in her freezer. I thanked God for the blessing. Our visitors came and we had a wonderful time. After they left, my neighbor across the street brought her father over to check the freezer. He used to work on freezers and he agreed with the repairman’s diagnosis. At that time, we didn’t have the money to get it fixed, so the freezer just sat there. One day after a prayer meeting, my prayer partner Helen and I continued to pray. She said she felt led to lay hands on the freezer and pray in the Holy Spirit. So I plugged in the freezer and we laid hands on it. All of a sudden, it began to run! I took all my meat and put it back into the freezer and praised God. Every time I would hear it running, I would praise the Lord. I called it my “Praise the Lord freezer.” When we moved, I gave it to my nephew and that freezer is still running today. It was a miracle! So you see, God doesn’t just answer prayers about big things, but He also cares about your every day needs and problems. Some people may say that I am way out in left field, but prayer and the Word works. About a year before Mac passed away, we had prayed that God would send us a station wagon. We wanted to be able to have room to put Mary’s wheelchair in it. We also wanted to have a place for Mary to lie down so we could travel in it. In our other car, I had to hold Mary in my lap while Mac put the wheelchair in the trunk. We had a small two-door coup and really needed something bigger. After Mac went home to be with the Lord, his insurance money made it possible for us to buy a station wagon. Before I bought the station wagon, I asked the Lord, “Save me from tire kicking. I don’t know what to get. Would you please direct me and show me what to buy.” One Sunday, I was sitting in church and I wasn’t even thinking about the car. When all of a sudden, out of the Spirit came an Oldsmobile dealer’s name. When I got home from church, I checked the newspaper to see if there was even a dealership by that name and there was one. I asked Steve to drive down to the dealership with me to see if it was the Lord. We drove down there and I said, “Let’s look at the used cars.” I was thinking the price would be lower and more affordable. I looked and there was nothing in my spirit toward any of the cars. Then Steve said, “What’s over there in back of that big fence?” He said it to me three times and all of a sudden I heard the Spirit of the Lord speaking through Steve. So I said, “Let’s go see.” We went over there and saw a station wagon. It was exactly what I wanted, except it had paneling on the sides. We went in and talked to a salesman. He said that he would order it just like I wanted it. I placed an order for a solid green, 1979 station wagon. We were getting ready for our first Christmas without Mac. Up until that point, we had spent all our Christmases in San Antonio. Steve was going home for Christmas and I didn’t want to be in San Antonio without Mac. So I planned for the girls and me to go to Memphis for Christmas. I reserved the tickets even though I knew it would be expensive. But I wanted to go. The week before Christmas, the dealership called and told us that the car had arrived. It was as if Mac was saying “Merry Christmas.” So we canceled the plane reservations and made plans to drive the new car. Harry and Edna also had family in Memphis, so we were delighted that they wanted to drive to Memphis with us. We broke in the new car: Steve, Harry, Edna, Mary, Patricia Ann, me, all our packages, luggage, and wheelchair made the long drive to Memphis. Harry bought us a luggage carrier to put on top of the car and Edna packed enough food for a week. I think we ate the entire box of food as we laughed and drove home for Christmas. This was just the first of many trips that we made together to Memphis. What a blessing those trips were to us. We also used the station wagon to make a trip to Richmond, VA to fulfill Mac’s desire of his girls visiting his hometown. Chapter 9 Home Again Steve stayed with us for about two years. Near the end of the second year, I began to think about going back home. Different things had happened in San Antonio that led me to think that after Steve left, it would be time for us to leave as well. Sometimes in your life you have to go back home and tell of the marvelous things that God has done. I also wanted the children to have a closer relationship with their family. It was quite a difficult decision to make. I prayed and really sought the Lord on this. I said, “Oh Lord, unless your presence go with me, I will not go.” He spoke to me and said, “Whether you go or stay, my presence will never leave you.” So I knew I had a choice. We put the house up for sale. It neared time for Steve to leave. His mother, Trudy, came for Steve’s graduation from Bible school. She was so proud and I was too. Steve was excited about going back home to Louisiana. It was so hard to leave San Antonio. It was where I had found my first love, Jesus. God had given me the girls there. We had such a lovely church family and I wondered how I would ever leave them. But God let me know that it was time. The prayer meeting that I had had for twelve years was moved to Helen’s house. In fact the prayer meeting is still going on even today, after more than thirty years. Over the years, the group has prayed for the children and me. I praise God for the dedicated group of women who have kept their childlike faith in God. They are strong prayer warriors. Our exit out of San Antonio was a sorrowful one, but also a joyful one. Right before we left, we had a garage sale. It was a time of breaking away from all the years in San Antonio. We gave a lot away, as well as what we sold. We tried to lighten the load that we carried to Mississippi. It was fifteen years worth of memories to sort through. My friend, Barbara Howard, came and helped price all the things. Other believers also came to help. On the day of the sale, a woman came and said, “I don’t know why I’m here, but I felt to come. I guess I just need prayer.” Her husband had just died and she was so angry at him for leaving her. She was having a hard time getting over the anger. So I brought her inside my house to pray for her. I knew where she was coming from, because I had dealt with similar feelings of being left behind. So we talked and prayed together. She cried and said she knew God had sent her. Another man came near the end of the day. The Lord revealed to me that he had stomach problems. I said, “Sir, could I pray for you? The Lord has shown me that you have problems with your stomach.” He said, “Oh would you, I’ve had stomach cancer.” So I laid hands on him and prayed. As I got to talking to him more, I found out that he made his living by going to garage sales. He would buy things and then resell them. It was late in the day and he asked what I would take for all of the things that I had left. I said, “Nothing sir, just take it.” The garage sale was a nice way to leave San Antonio. Roz gave me a going away party. She had all my friends over to her house. David and Carol flew in to drive the moving van to Mississippi. David had once told me, “Aunt Jean, any time you move back, let me know and I will come get you.” And he did. What really comforted me was that my dear friend Helen drove the girls and me to our new home. We sang children’s songs and just had a wonderful trip to Mississippi. We arrived in Memphis and stayed a few days with Snow. She had some of the family over and fixed a meal for us. She cooked corn on the cob that day. We were laughing and talking, when I looked down and saw my two front teeth lying on my plate. They had broken off and were some of the last of my real teeth. They had been holding my upper bridge in and now I had no upper teeth at all. So it left me with a toothless grin. I thought, “Oh my, what am I going to do? Here I am getting ready to make my grand entrance back into my home town, forty years later and forty pounds heavier. Now my upper teeth are missing. What a humbling experience.” I decided to stay in Memphis for a few days until the dentist could provide me with some new teeth. I had left San Antonio with mixed emotions. The day before we left, I rode around the city. I just praised and thanked God for all the beautiful, wonderful miracles that He had done in our lives while in San Antonio. Now as I look back, I realize how difficult it was for little Patricia Ann to move. This was where she was raised and she had such a close knit group of neighborhood friends. They had all come to know the Lord. We had children’s Bible studies and they played together. She went to a Christian school and had just finished the fifth grade. She had lost her father and then after growing attached to Steve, she lost him. She lost Harry and Edna, friends that were like second parents to her and Mary. She left her friends and her church family. It was a very hard adjustment for Patricia Ann. She later told me that it was like moving to a foreign country. The culture and way of thinking were so very different. It took a while to get over that experience. Only God helped her through it. She did find great pleasure in getting to know all of her aunts, uncles and cousins. This was one of the reasons that I moved back. I wanted her to have closer communication and closer ties to my natural family. I prayed about where God wanted me to live when we moved back. He placed in my heart that He wanted me in Holly Springs, the place where I was born. Holly Springs is a beautiful, Southern town. It has many ante-bellum homes that were left from the Civil War. There were huge oak trees as well as many other beautiful trees. I didn’t realize how much I had missed the trees, because San Antonio didn’t have a lot of large oak trees. San Antonio’s climate was more arid than Mississippi’s. In the springtime, Holly Springs was like a picturebook with all of the beautiful dogwoods, azaleas, and flowers. My grandparents and parents were buried in the cemetery in Holly Springs, so I felt like I was back home. My wonderful sister-in-law, Ruby, lived in Holly Springs. She was my late brother Frank’s wife and she was like a sister to me. One of her sons, C.B., and his family also lived in town. My cousins Mary Lou, Rudy and Liz lived in Holly Springs too and it was just wonderful to have family around again. I liked the warmth and friendliness of the people in Holly Springs. When I would go out and pass someone in the car, they would always wave. At first I thought, “Oh they remember me.” Then I remembered it was just a friendly custom down South. Strangers wave and acknowledge others. Patricia Ann picked it up and began to do the same. When we would go to Memphis, she would wave at people, especially if it was a good looking boy. I told her it was okay, but we should just do it in a little town. I had not had the opportunity to go to Holly Springs to look for a house. So my sisters, Ann and Snow, went to Holly Springs to look for a house. They found a house for us. I had asked God for a house close to Patricia Ann’s school so that she could walk to school every day. I planned to put Patricia Ann in the private school in town. I also asked God for a piano teacher. Patricia Ann had taken piano lessons in San Antonio for a number of years. I wanted her to continue with lessons. Ann and Snow found the perfect house. It was right up the hill from the school. A few weeks later, I met Mrs. Crutcher, a piano teacher. She became a dear friend and she only lived a short distance from us. God answered my prayers by meeting every need. Helen stayed with us for a while after we arrived in Holly Springs. I don’t know how she did it, but in a couple of days she had unpacked and arranged the entire house. She said it was a supernatural gift from God. The house was completely in order. It was a miracle. The first day that we were there, there was a knock at the door. In walked my precious cousins, Lou and Liz, with a beautiful bouquet of gardenias. It was a joy to get out and walk around the town square. I saw familiar faces everywhere I went. The pressure of the big city was off and it was a time of leisure that I really needed. I had become very fatigued because the pressures were great in San Antonio. It was a time of refreshing and relaxing. We often went to see my sister Ann in Victoria, Mississippi. She was just sixteen miles from us. Mabel and Tommy lived thirty-nine miles in one direction while Snow and Charlie lived thirty-nine miles in the other direction. It was wonderful to be able to visit family and to have family come visit me. I had missed it so much. It was a good time, but also a hard time. Mary, Patricia Ann and I were by ourselves. Patricia Ann was such a help. I don’t know what I would have done without her. I would have been confined without her there to watch Mary. I was able to go grocery shopping or whatever and she was there with little Mary. We continued having our family reunions. Now that I was back, our reunions seemed to increase. We began inviting more of the distant kinfolk, not just the immediate family. It was a wonderful time of family coming together. Ann took over as head of the family. She was the oldest and she assumed the responsibility of bringing family together. After Ann passed away, Snow and Charlie took over. They faithfully gathered the clan together and still do it to this day. I am very grateful for it. I know it is pleasing to the Lord of how Snow and Charlie love family. They’ve passed many blessings on to the family. Another difficult thing that I faced in moving to Mississippi was leaving behind our Christian doctor, Dr. Bill. Our neighbors had recommended him to me when the girls were little. Maxine’s children had gone to him for years. Her teenage daughter was still going to him. Dr. Bill was a pediatrician, but he told her that she could come see him as long as it didn’t embarrass her. That was just the kind of doctor that he was. He was such a dedicated doctor, so kind and reassuring. I can’t tell you how many times he quieted my fears and encouraged me with little Mary. Dr. Bill used to tell me, “I like to use a little medicine and leave the rest to the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.” I thought, “Lord, what are we going to do without Dr. Bill?” Over the years, we have kept contact with him and he is still such a blessing in our lives. Great will be his reward in heaven because of all his kindnesses that he has shared with his patients. Even after we moved away, we were able to call on him. God spoke to me and told me he wanted me to go to a revival in Dallas. There had been sixty-six days of revival and I needed a real stirring in my spirit. I always wanted to be obedient to step out in faith when God showed me to do something. God spoke to me to take the girls and dedicate them to the Lord for ministry. Right before we were to leave, Mary began to run a fever. I took her to the doctor and he said not to take her out of the house for at least a month. He was emphatic that I not take her out because it could really be serious. I said, “Lord, I know that you prompted me to go to Dallas, so I want a strong witness that it is okay to take Mary. I don’t want to move out in presumption with her running a fever.” So I called Dr. Bill and he said, “Jean, I would go on and take her. Leave her up to the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. You’ve always obeyed the Spirit.” So I took Mary. I would never put Mary’s life in danger, but I knew that God had spoken to me. When God speaks, He will make everything right. When we were about halfway there, I checked her fever and it had broken. That was in Hope, Arkansas. She was fine the rest of the way. On that particular weekend, the family was busy helping Ann move. I knew if they caught wind of what I was about to do, there would really be some opposition. I knew many of them would think that it was very foolish. The only one that I could tell was Ruby. She loved the Lord and knew about the moving of the Spirit. She didn’t question that God had told me to go to Dallas. I told her so someone would know where we were. She could tell them if anyone wanted to know. The meeting had such a wonderful anointing and I dedicated the girls to the Lord. Before we left, I thought to myself, “Well, we are so close to San Antonio. Would you permit us to go Lord?” I felt a release to go and we headed to San Antonio to see our friends. Ruby told me, “You know, nobody missed you until they had finished moving. Then someone asked where you were. They asked me and I had to tell them that you went to Dallas.” It broke them in to not be too concerned when I up and followed the leading of the Spirit. One of the things that I really watched when I went back home was to be careful not to put family before the Lord. I wanted to always put the Lord first and not allow what family thought to sway me. That didn’t mean that I didn’t listen to them or take their advice into consideration. But I had to hear from God myself. If God told me something, then that took precedence over what family said. After we had been settled in Holly Springs for about a year, the Lord spoke to me to start Christian Women’s Fellowship in Holly Springs. For thirteen years in San Antonio, I had had the privilege of fellowshiping with the entire Body of Christ. It didn’t matter what denomination or color people were or whether they were rich or poor. The Spirit of the Living God brought us together and our fellowship was in Jesus. The love of God was so wonderful among the body of believers. I knew that God wanted that same freedom among His children in Holly Springs. The Bible says that people knew they were disciples by their great love one for another (Jn 13:35). I wanted Christians in Holly Springs to experience the same type of love that I had experienced in San Antonio. I really prayed about it and asked Him to show me how. Shortly after that, I had a call from Joan, a pastor’s wife in Victoria, MS. She asked me if I would come speak at a woman’s meeting at her church. I went there and saw JoAnn. JoAnn was a friend from years back. I had met her when I used to visit my sister Ann in the summer. In course of events, JoAnn mentioned that we needed to start a Christian Women’s Fellowship. That was my witness. I began to share the vision that God had given me for the area. We got so excited and we started seeking the Lord about all the details. It came to us that we were to have a luncheon and invite all the women from the area. Our thought was to have a well-known speaker come and share. As I was praying on it, the Lord spoke and said, “YOU are to be the first speaker.” I said, “Oh no Lord. You will have to send me a witness and tell Joan and JoAnn.” So Joan called me and said, “The Lord spoke to us and said that you were to be the first speaker.” So I decided that I would share the testimony of what the Lord had done in my life. For the first meeting, we had fifty women attend. It was glorious. I told them that I would speak, if my friend Niece would play and sing. Niece was the granddaughter of Mandy. Mandy and her husband Charles lived on my father’s place and had worked there as sharecroppers. Mandy was just like a sister to my mother and was a wonderful friend of the family. Mandy had raised Niece as a daughter from the time she was two years old. When I had first come back to Holly Springs, I had gone to visit Mandy. There, I was reacquainted with Niece. She became one of my dearest friends and used to come visit me often at the house. Niece could SING and play the piano. Niece and her friend Jamie sang together and often visited different churches ministering in song. So they agreed to play and sing. The first song that Niece sang was “If Anybody Asks You Who I Am, Tell Them I Am a Child of God.” God honored us and the anointing fell. I was able to tell some of the wonderful things that God had done for the girls and me. After that, we began to have the meeting once a month in the fellowship hall at First Methodist Church in Holly Springs. The Lord showed me that He wanted women in our community to share their testimonies of what God had done for them. We were to also pray for one another’s needs. Dot, Ruby, Margaret, Niece, Jamie, Betty, Veda, JoAnn, and Joan were some of the precious ones that volunteered each month to help with the meetings. The meetings began to grow and it was a wonderful time of coming together to fellowship in the Lord. It lasted until I left and the Lord told me to pass the spirit-stick to Niece. So Niece took over the meetings and continued them on for several years. Through CWF, I came to know so many of God’s beautiful children. Sometimes, I would see them in the grocery store and we would stop and have prayer. It was just wonderful to see God connecting His body together as the Bride of Christ. I will always cherish the fellowship and what God did for me through CWF. God began to send in some of my old friends from San Antonio. Aubrey and Monica came and held a town wide crusade. They had held crusades with thousands of people, but they came to a little town to see me and hold a crusade. Not too many came to the crusade, but I know that two or three people came to the Lord. Later on, God sent Chaplain and Alma Barnett, to spend a weekend with me. Chaplain Barnett was a retired military chaplain. After his retirement, he continued to minister. He had an old film called King of Kings by Cecil B. De Mille. It was probably one of the first movies made of the story of Christ. Chaplain brought it with him and showed it at the First Methodist Church. I remember what an experience it was and how it blessed those who came to see it. Another time, we decided to have a revival on the square. We got permission and invited all the churches in town to participate. My friend Carleen was there and led us in singing. Carleen had sung for many of our meetings in San Antonio. We had other singers and several people shared the Word with us. It was a beautiful night and we placed chairs right on the Courthouse lawn. Many came and enjoyed the presence of the Lord. I will never forget a precious young man who came up to me crying. He said “I do not know what I feel, but it is what I felt when I used to be at home with Mama and Daddy.” He felt the love of God. The love of God filled the square that night and I believe many hearts were changed. We still continued to pray for our city. We asked for a holy city, in fact we begin to call it Holy Springs instead of Holly Springs. When I went back to Holly Springs, I didn’t know that I would be standing with many of the family who would go on to be with Jesus. The first one was my beautiful nephew Jimmy. He was so full of love and kindness. He lived a beautiful life of giving. When Mac and I were in San Antonio, he always sent us a special love offering at Christmas. His wife, Hartsell made us the most wonderful fruit cakes and fudge. They always gave us so much, that I didn’t have to bake anything. We had enough to serve at our Christmas party. When we moved to Holly Springs, Jimmy was there to give us a lot of love and support. Jimmy began to have health problems. At the age of 42, he crossed over to the other side. I was able to rejoice in the knowledge that he had Jesus and we would be together again. The Lord also called home my brother-in-law Tomie, two sisters-in-law, Ruby and Trudy and Woody’s mother, Nannie Conway. I was grateful to the Lord for the privilege to be there during their times of sickness and need. I was able to pray and comfort them while they were crossing over. I just praise God for the day that we will meet again. When family members believe in Christ Jesus and make Him Lord of their lives, they have eternal life. It is a great comfort to those left behind. After I came to the Lord, I found out that earth was not my home. We were all pilgrims just passing through this life. Heaven will be our final resting place. Each time I began to get comfortable and plant my roots in here on earth, the Lord would move me on to another place. It was to keep me free to do more work in the Kingdom. It was very hard for me to leave San Antonio and move to Holly Springs. I had to make sure that I didn’t put family before God. So I put my house up for sale and offered it to God. I wanted to be ready to go when He said to go. After Patricia Ann finished high school, she went to college in Memphis. I began to feel like it was good to stay in Holly Springs. I told the Lord, “Lord, I will just stay right here.” A week later the house sold. I had not signed a new contract, but had told the realtor, my friend Bert, to leave the house up for sale. So even though I had changed my mind about leaving, I wasn’t going to go back on my word. My Mother taught me that a man’s word was his bond. I knew that it would not be pleasing to God to break my word. My friend Niece came and brought her whole church, Adolph Chapel to pack for me. She told me to go on ahead to Memphis and take little Mary. She said to find a place to live and they would bring my things to me. Now if that isn’t Love! I know the Lord has showered many blessings upon them because of their kindness to Mary and me. Patricia met a young man during this time. They both wanted to go to college in Tulsa, Oklahoma. They married and left for college. Chapter 10 In the Harvest Mary and I were left living alone in Memphis. We often went to visit Ann and her second husband Jack. I always felt so much at home there. I remember the last time that I was with my sweet Ann. We had awakened early and she wanted me to go walking with her. She told me how her morning walk was her time with the Lord. She would sing and talk to him. We walked a long way that morning and I was surprised at how easy it was for me to keep up with her. I know now that it was the presence of the Lord with us. When we reached the house, Jack was in the yard looking at some tomato plants. I stopped to talk to him, but Ann didn’t stop and walked into the house. Jack said later that he thought it was strange that she didn’t stop. I went into the house looking for Ann, but she was in her bedroom. I decided to read my Bible until she came into the kitchen and then I would help her with breakfast. I began to read in Matthew about being a disciple of Jesus. He said unless you leave Father and Mother, sister and brother to follow Him, you could not be His disciple (Lk 18:29-30). I knew God was dealing with me about going to Tulsa. I told the Lord, “I can’t leave my precious sister Ann.” Jack came into the house and was concerned that Ann had not come out of the bedroom yet. When he went back to their room, he found out that she had gone home to be with Jesus. At Ann’s coronation service, one of her friends sang “My Banquet Table is Full. Who Will Go Into the Harvest?” She said it was Ann’s favorite song. It was a sign to me. I said, “Yes Lord, Mary and I will go back into the harvest and serve you in Tulsa.” It was also difficult to leave my church, The Jubilee Church. My nephew Frank Conway was the pastor. He wasn’t just the church’s pastor, but he was MY pastor. I had such wonderful times with Frank and his wife, Annette. The church services were like a little bit of heaven. Before I moved, God told me that He wanted me to grow in His love--the unconditional love that casts out all fear and never fails. The love of God surpasses all love because God IS love. That summer, I put our house in Memphis up for sale. That fall, Mary and I moved to Tulsa. My nephew Steve had been feeling that he should go back to school and complete his Masters. He decided to go to ORU. Steve and I shared an apartment, not too far from ORU. It was also close to where Patricia Ann and her husband lived. It was a very exciting time. I felt as if I was a House Mom to all the college students that came over to the apartment--cooking, praying and sharing with many. I had many occasions to decrease in the flesh and to let God increase in me. I grew in His love. I met many Christians from all over the world. Louise and Rabih were wonderful friends, who were originally from Palestine and Lebanon. My good friend Degol was a Christian Jew from Ethiopia. We became like sisters and brothers in the body of Christ. June, Pat, Jerry, Linda, Krista and a host of others became like my own family. It would be hard to name all of them. They all have been a part of the Master’s bouquet in Tulsa. Steve graduated in two years from ORU with his master's degree. Patricia Ann and her husband graduated after four years. There were many trials and testings for Patricia Ann and her husband. I was sad when they could not make it together as husband and wife. They divorced. It was a very painful time for all of us, but God in His mercy and grace healed us. God is a faithful God and the God of a second chance. He brought her together with a beautiful Christian man name Steve, who is full of love and compassion. They married and Patricia Ann is now the mother of a beautiful son. We had many times of testing, as well as many great victories. The girls were heirs to an estate inheritance from a great uncle. The will was contested concerning whether adopted children should share in the inheritance. They both received subpoenas to appear in court. Because of Mary’s condition, she needed to have a court appointed guardian. The day the police officer came out to serve Mary her papers, Mary was lying in her wheel chair with a big smile on her face. By law, the officer had to lay the papers on her. He looked so embarrassed and said, “What people will do for money." We went to court in Dallas. What an awesome experience! God put us in a bubble and hid us in His presence. I had such great joy and victory. The Lord gave me a dream the night before showing that He had brought the girls their inheritance. He always looks after widows and orphans. What a great God we have. We won the court case and a victory for adopted children in Texas. Another trial and victory was when Mary become ill and had to go into the hospital. She had aspirated food and it had gone into both of her lungs. She ended up with double pneumonia and lost a lot of weight. The doctors didn’t give her much hope, but I knew Jesus was her hope. The Lord was not finished with her work here. She was healed of pneumonia and had a feeding tube placed in her stomach for her to eat. She gained weight and is in good health now. During this time of illness, we met and befriended many wonderful doctors and nurses who belonged to the Lord. Mary and I had many happy trips traveling from Tulsa to San Antonio to see old friends. We also frequently went to Memphis to see our family. I laid Mary on her bed in the back of our station wagon. We put our praise tapes on and then sang and rejoiced in the Spirit all the way. We always had time to stop and smell the roses along the way. God was so good to keep us and give us His joy and great provision. I found out the way to keep the victory is to praise Him in all things. He is worthy to be praised. God gives great joy and peace to His children. Now in my later years, I finally became a grandmother of a beautiful baby boy. He was named Murray James, after both of his grandfathers. What a great joy he has brought into my life. I am in a different season of my life now. God has given me a beautiful home with my children. Mary and I do not travel as much now, but we keep busy praying for others. I spend a great amount of time thanking God every day for what He has given us through Christ Jesus and the victory won at Calvery. I will keep gathering flowers for the Masters Bouquet, working in His kingdom until the day He calls me home. On Our Way Home We are on our way home, on our way home. Jesus is coming, we are on our way home. Bring in the lambs, lead in the sheep. Bring them all together, where there will be peace. Let nothing disturb, let nothing divide. Let peace reign over the flock of our King. We are on our way home, on our way home. Jesus is coming, we are on our way home. Leave none behind, leave none behind. Jesus is coming, we are on our way home. There are many more stories, but I don’t have enough pages to tell it all. Each and every member of my family is precious to me.