Galactic Fat

Adult
In the near future, pizza boy Robar Drill is transformed by The Federal Government into a metaman with enormous powers, the only person capable of saving Earth from an alien race bent on harvesting human cellulite. This bawdy, outrageous satire follows Robar and his six strange companions to the Planet Of Fatty Doom, a horrific world that, under Robar’s influence, may be no worse than Earth. More

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Published: Aug. 16, 2012
Words: 68,010
Language: English
ISBN: 9781476258607
About H. C. Turk

A: This is hard.
Q: Why is making a bio so hard for you?
A: Because it's like talking. I don't like to talk; I like to write.
Q: But people want to know about authors. Reading a book requires a lot of effort.
A: Writing one ain't exactly playtime.
Q: That's better. Go ahead, tell us more. Did you have a pleasant childhood?
A: Ask my dog; he was there.
Q: Your dog is stuffed. He's not a real dog.
A: He's more real than you are. You can’t even ask a good question.
Q: Here’s one: Why should people read your books?
A: Because my puppy will be sad if they don’t.
Q: We need to get serious here. How many novels have you written?
A: 33.
Q: I’ll bet your dog can’t count that high. How long have you been writing?
A: I’ll answer if you promise not to kick my dog again (metaphorically).
Q: He wouldn’t feel it—he’s stuffed.
A: If someone kicked the stuffing out of you, I bet you wouldn’t enjoy it.
Q: Would I enjoy it more than reading one of your books? Or would it be equally painful?
A: You’re cruel to dogs AND to authors.
Q: If you answer my last question, I promise to be nice. How many years have you been writing?
A: [mumbles]
Q: That’s pathetic.
A: Why don’t you ask me about my stories?
Q: Stories are for campfires.
A: The basis of history’s greatest novels is the story: the story of nations, cultures, families, individuals. The greatest idea that can be expressed in fiction is story.
Q: Great, so tell me about your characters.
A: Dull and Dumb are not two of my characters, or characteristics.
Q: Do you ever write about animals, stuffed or not?
A: Rescued greyhounds in Heaven Again, tiny ponies in Only The Impassioned, mudfish in Resurrection Flowers, ghosts in An Atmosphere Of Angels.
Q: Ghosts aren’t animals, they’re unsettled spirits. If ghosts continue to read, what will they find in your novels?
A: They will find passion, idea, and spirited characters whose lives are a story. And puppies.

My music is available here:
http://hcturk.bandcamp.com/

My animated music videos are here:
http://exposureroom.com/members/HCTurk

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