Meghan Boehners has been writing erotic fiction for nearly two decades. She started young ;). With stories published in Hustler, Penthouse Forum, and for private clients who want some more, ah...personalized erotica, Meghan's vast experience gives her plenty of material to draw from...with more coming.
on July 19, 2014 :
Not to be confused with THE BILLION DOLLAR MILKMAID. Where are all these breast-obsessed billionaires in real life? I feel like I should have seen them on the cover of grocery rack magazines, caught in flagrante delicto with a pregnant woman and a milk pump.
THE BILLIONAIRE'S MILKMAID is terrible, even for free porn. Luckily, it is of the "it's so terrible it's good" variety of bad porn, but the line is a fine one. Sometimes it's just "so terrible that it's terrible." I skimmed some sections.
Jessica Browning works as a project manager in a Big Company. She just got off maternity leave, and her husband ran off with the delivery nurse, leaving her all on her lonesome as a single mom. Life is hard.
(Hard being the operative word, here.)
One day, Jessica is freaking out because her boobs have left huge wet circles on her blouse and she's got her breast pump but there's nowhere she can pump her milk! Because the bathroom is, well, the bathroom and unhygienic (spoiler alert: plothole here), and she can't pump her breasts in her car. Because...well, because reasons!
So she is pacing in the hall with the pump, and her shirt is getting damper and damper, and then she runs into this guy who tells her he knows a place (wink). Several creepy winks and pointed stares at her breasts later, he leads her to an empty conference room (oh! not a serial killer van, after all!), and she can pump in peace. But while she is draining her milk, she thinks about this hot man, and gets a little too excited. Pretty soon milk is squirting everywhere and she decides to masturbate with the milk pump. Because that's totally sanitary, right?
Her pussy was soaking wet now, panties so far beyond damp it was like a monsoon hit her down there, and if she were Anastasia Steele her Inner Goddess would be treading water in a 19-foot tsunami right about now (10).
Oh yeah, totally sanitary.
Later that day, she has to milk herself again, but oh noez! The super sekrit conference room is being used for an actual conference!! Luckily, Creepy McWinkyface appears again and takes her into another room, and he eyes her breasts and makes comments that would get him slapped with a sexual harassment suit in real life, but Jessica McStupidpants just takes it in stride and makes some of her own.
"Are you here for-" he pointed very specically at each of her breasts, eyes lingering so obviously she thought they might be glued, literally, to her, "that? To milk your breasts to feed your baby?" His jaunty smile was a challenge, as if he were saying, Just you try not to be aroused right now (16).
And then they go into this other conference room and begin to fuck.
And of course, he decides he's going to help himself to a nice warm glass of Jessica.
This wasn't foreplay--this was everyplay. Foreverplay. No-man's-landplay (22).
Isn't that profound?
Cervixes get rammed. Seed gets spewed. A conference table gets covered in various juices.
Meanwhile, I'm just sitting here, all like,
Also, the second half of this book is all advertisements.
(review of free book)