The Porridge King

Rated 4.00/5 based on 2 reviews
Take a journey into the strange and magical land known as the Mea Culpa Valley; an area with a long and proud history of profound weirdness and insanity. The residents of a small chunk of squalor known as Timbrook are visited by a quirky knight on a quest, and inadvertently become swept up in a hysterical adventure like none ever before witnessed. Excitement! Laughs! Mayhem! Romance! Intrigue!

Available formats: epub, mobi, pdf, rtf, lrf, pdb, txt

Words: 103,390
Language: English
ISBN: 9781452378428
About R.D. Winfrey

About the Awfur:

R.D. Winfrey was born on the roof of a salami factory somewhere near Louisville, Kentucky. The last time we checked, that area was a part of the United States, although we don’t know for how much longer.

The circumstances leading to his birth are still shrouded in mystery and cheap vodka, but many believe it had something to do with a nearby livestock auction house. In any case, the young tike was dutifully raised by a flock of Canadian geese, who taught the little pug-nosed punk how to fly long distances and crap on people’s windshields. He was a quick learner and was found to have the intestinal fortitude needed for high-altitude bombing raids on such prized targets as rush-hour traffic jams and shopping mall parking lots.

Unfortunately, a mid-air collision with a cross-eyed duck ended his flying career.

He spent his remaining teenage years as a string-puppet in a traveling Creationist lecture series, where he played a brontosaurus that had converted to Mormonism while on Noah’s Ark. After a large tour of the southern states, he gave up being a puppet in order to study law, which he thought could best be accomplished by breaking into the U.S. Supreme Court building and stealing every book in the place. He almost succeeded in his plan, but was apprehended when he accidentally set-off his dump truck’s alarm system.

After his three years of imprisonment in Guantanamo Bay, and feeling exceptionally soggy, he decided to get a job as writer for the prestigious entertainment-news magazine: “Pornography Today”, where he basically wrote the same movie review over and over again. He later enrolled in a charter school for misguided badgers, eventually earning a Doctorate in Advanced Growling.

After a long sojourn to Tibet, Kashmir, and East St. Louis, he ultimately settled down and married outside the family.

Currently, he spends most of his days writing grocery lists and fictious bus schedules. Occasionally, he writes a book or a short story, but only if prodded with a stick or a large bowl of warm mildew.

He is the writer of “The Porridge King.”

If enough people buy it, his wife has promised to let him out of the shed.

Also by This Author

Reviews

Review by: jacob hall on Jan. 16, 2011 :
Winfrey wears his influences on his sleeve for much of the book. There is a heavy dose of the irreverent humor of Monty Python and Douglas Adams, and the silliness of the Marx Brothers. There’s a brief take on Abbott and Costello’s ‘Who’s on first?’ routine, as well as an introductory section that reminded me of Woody Allen’s earliest writings in the way in which each paragraph ends with a punch line. For the most part however, it is an amalgamation of these comic influences that add to the hilarious nature of this book. Yes, it is somewhat silly, but there are also, action sequences and character studies that allow for more than just jokes. A delightful story that ends rather too abruptly but did make me read the second book. Not great but awfully funny.
(reviewed long after purchase)

Review by: wreznor on Nov. 18, 2010 :
exceptionally funny...i can't wait for the next book
(reviewed the day of purchase)

Report this book