Goldilocks: Blonde Assassin

Rated 4.00/5 based on 3 reviews
It's a world of myth and legend. Ours is the story every child is told before bed time around the world. But this iconic tale has a new twist. You've never seen Goldilocks until you've seen her as the Blonde Assassin. Follow her on a mission that will prevent bedtime from ever being the same. More
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Price: Free! USD

Words: 3,000
Language: English
ISBN: 9781301193844
About Chris Van Dyk

Salutations, dear readers! My name is Chris. I've been a writer for a number of years now. My first book, "Awaken: The Hollowstone Chronicles" was originally printed by Tate Publishing in 2009. I have since left Tate and am now publishing exclusively online. My favorite genres are horror, suspense, mystery, fantasy, and sci-fi. Please check back often as I'm getting pretty prolific as of late! The first three books of my Hollowstone Chronicles are now available and have the green light for Premium Catalog status! Books IV and V who have yet to be titled are... somewhere in my mind. Don't worry, we'll find them. ^_^;; I have also written a memoir book about my experiences as an American teaching English in Korea. Trust me, the act of simply taking a shower is enough to write a book over there! Be sure to check out "A Life Less Ordinary!"

As a fun little project, this year I've started writing a series of short stories that I have tentatively named The Twisted Fairy Tales. This is a series of interlocking stories that basically make it a point to ruin your childhood with dark humor, adult situations, and wanton violence. The series kicks off with "Goldilocks: Blonde Assassin." These stories are FREE and I encourage anyone who has a warped sense of humor to check them out.

Other than that, I'm an English teacher, a martial artist, a linguist, and a pretty darn good cook if I do say so myself. I'm originally from Dublin, VA, but I relocated to Baton Rouge, LA to start over and try to build a life here. When I figure out what I want to be when I grow up, I'll let you know.

Thank you for visiting my page and taking an interest in my books! If you'd like to know more, please feel free to connect with me via Facebook. Sadly, I'm hopelessly addicted to Facebook, but it's a good place to get updates for that reason. Happy reading!

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Review by: Fantasy Rewind on March 15, 2013 :
Well written, but a weird story. Why would someone want to ruin such a nice story? I didn't find it hilarious as earlier reviewer did.
(review of free book)

Review by: Adam Crosier on March 12, 2013 :
Wonderful wonderful! I would turn the stars up to eleven if I could. The untold true story of what happened that day, had me laughing. It took me a short time to read but that's what makes it great, it's an adult bedtime story ( no not one of those you sick minded people). I hope more like this are written an soon!
(review of free book)

Review by: Josh Davis on March 12, 2013 :
Yesterday was my first day as a member of, and the first free book listed in the "free" category was this gem of a short-story. I hesitated to download "Goldilocks: Blonde Assassin" because the cover leaves a lot to be desired, but am happy that I took my primary school librarian's advice, and didn't judge the book by its cover. So short that I was able to read it in 10 minutes, and I was laughing the entire time! HILARIOUS!!!
(review of free book)

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