Top Twat Twit Tosh

By Paul Bowden
$2.99 Rating: Not yet rated.
Published: July 20, 2011
Words: 41708 (approximate)
Language: English

Short description

Here is a book of the sort of tosh that social media fills our lives with (if we let it) ... and yet … there is the occasional wise or useful snippet that almost makes you think social media could have some sort of useful contribution to make to life … if only we could cut out 99% of the 'twats' and 99% of the 'twits' they send out!

Extended description

Social media is that great invention that allows us to broadcast information, images and our opinions to the world. Sometimes it lets us send these words and pictures only to people that we have agreed can be part of our social group (which seems like a sensible idea) but at other times anyone at all can choose to receive our broadcasts and then pass those broadcasts on to whoever has chosen to be on the receiving end of their broadcasts, and so on ad infinitum, which means that any tosh we broadcast effectively becomes available to the whole world.
The problem is that most of us don't have anything worth saying. That's why we're not paid to work in the 'real' media. What we say generally isn't worth hearing (except perhaps by family and friends and work colleagues), so social media - or at least some of it - seems to have solved a problem that doesn't exist, namely how can people with no meaningful connection to each other broadcast and receive each other's worthless opinions and usel... (Read more) Social media is that great invention that allows us to broadcast information, images and our opinions to the world. Sometimes it lets us send these words and pictures only to people that we have agreed can be part of our social group (which seems like a sensible idea) but at other times anyone at all can choose to receive our broadcasts and then pass those broadcasts on to whoever has chosen to be on the receiving end of their broadcasts, and so on ad infinitum, which means that any tosh we broadcast effectively becomes available to the whole world.
The problem is that most of us don't have anything worth saying. That's why we're not paid to work in the 'real' media. What we say generally isn't worth hearing (except perhaps by family and friends and work colleagues), so social media - or at least some of it - seems to have solved a problem that doesn't exist, namely how can people with no meaningful connection to each other broadcast and receive each other's worthless opinions and useless information? It seems to me that social media is to a large extent being used by twats to send out masses of pointless messages to other twats. A person who is pointless and a waste of time and space is sometimes known as a twit, so I think a twat's message should be called a twit. (I hope no one is thinking of pinching my idea, or using a similar word to describe social media messages!)
I've taken real messages found on social media (but I haven't identified who the originators of those messages are) and I now present them to you (with some inventions and some editing) as a collection of the sort of tosh that twats twit! This is their top stuff!
To be fair, I have to admit that I've occasionally found a little gem of wisdom or some useful advice or information on social media, so I have included some of those sorts of message as well to give a slightly more balanced view of what social media is really like. Even so, it would be nice if we were able, or chose, to filter out all the twats, twits and tosh that are irrelevant and pointless and just receive the useful, clever and pertinent messages. If we did that, however, we probably wouldn't call it social media any more. We'd have to call it something like … the telephone!
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Tags

retard, spanner, it was dumb to invent it but its even dumber to use it

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