“Hey, don't snoop while I'm writing. Hmmm. 'Quality of Service? ' Excellent.”

“Thank you.”

“'Promptness? ' Well, you were a little slow getting started…”

“That's because you kept dropping those real subtle hints about me needing more protein in my diet, and how you just happened to know where I could get some freshly squeezed, so I pretended to be asleep 'til you got serious.”

“I was very serious, and that'll lose you points. ‘Failure to take the customer's desires under account’. I'll just note that under 'How May We Improve? '“

“Hey, I didn't laugh at your orgasm face, that ought to qualify me for Employee of the Month.”

“Yes, you did!”

“No, I was laughing at the noises you were making, chipmunk boy.”

“Wow, you get surly when you're off duty, don't you?”

“You started it. And don't call me surly.”

“Let's see… 'Quality of food'. Exquisite. I should thank the chef.”

“I don't think my parents are near a phone. You could thank God, I suppose. But call it something else, if I hear you thanking God for my pussy I'll just get embarrassed.”

“I'll put it in French, that's what the best restaurants do anyway. Uh, “chaud humide chat” or something. Nah, if I was going to do that I woulda said grace beforehand. Besides, then I'd feel obligated to do the same whenever I was dissatisfied with the service.”