Buy Her A Diamond
Before It’s Too Late
Eden Street Press
Copyright 2012 J.A. Pak
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the writer.
One day Fen and I are walking through the Diamond District in midtown and this guy approaches us. He’s huge — maybe six foot six, built like Goliath, with long dusty hair in free-forming dreadlocks. The old army jacket he’s wearing looks like it hasn’t been washed since the Civil War and he’s holding up a cardboard sign, the warning handwritten: The End Is Coming. An urban prophet. Just as we’re about to walk past him, he takes a step towards Fen and says in this low, incredibly menacing way, “Buy her a diamond before it’s too late.”
So what’s the safest thing to do in New York City when confronted with the bizarre? Keep walking. And we did. Fen even gripped my elbow in this protective gesture and hurried us along. We were well down the next block before we felt safe enough to stop. And then we looked at each other and burst out laughing. What a mad street performance, we thought!