They split up in 1952 when I was in eighth grade. I felt loyal to my father because I thought he needed somebody to be with him and help take care of him. So I requested that the judge allow me to live with my father who had moved a few blocks away to an apartment. The judge agreed and I moved in with my father. Unfortunately my sister had to stay with mother, which meant that my baby sister and I were split up. She was only two or three then and I was worried about her. I did everything I could to continue to see her as much as possible and my father got to have her on weekends. At least we had the weekends together.

Aside from the personal trauma the divorce caused, it was compounded by the fact that it wasn’t nearly as common as it is today. Not only was it unusual, but it was really looked at in a very negative way. So I pretty much kept it a secret from people that my parents were divorced. It was something that wasn’t talked about because it was a very bad thing. It was a social blight to be from a divorced family. I had little choice but to internalize my problems so by the time I got to high school I became a pretty angry kid. I remember acting out in wild driving, on my motorcycle and later in my car.

There were times when I wondered, rhetorically, if I had been mistakenly switched at birth. I was very shy growing up. I have a cousin, C.J. Luton, who was like an older brother to me. He was five years older and to this very day he tells me, "You know when we were kids, and we had the family get-togethers people hardly knew you existed." He said, "Nobody heard boo from you Phil. You were always the quietest kid in the world and you always seemed to be observing and not saying anything."

I think he was right. I didn’t feel as though I fit in. I always felt better off observing from the sidelines. I remember my experience going through grade school, junior high and high school was similar. I was shy and never wanted to get up in front of people to speak or anything like that. I think I lived a quiet introspective life though I didn't realize what I was doing at the time. It seems clearer to me now, and I have friends from high school days who tell me that I was an introspective kid.