The Awesome Tales of Awesomeness
By: S. Miles
Published by S. Miles at Smashwords
Copyright 2012 S. Miles
This book is dedicated to my family. I would like to thank my whole family for all of the loving care and support they give me.
Story one: The Dude: Once upon a time, there was a dude. And he lived happily ever after. The end.
Story Two: The Dude (continued): Once upon a time, there was a story of a dude and the story was rather short and unspecific. So I shall elaborate. This dude had a hat. It was a very nice hat! I think I’ve been specific enough! Too specific, perhaps. Mission accomplished. And this dude, along with his very specific hat, lived happily ever after. With his cat, as well. But I’ve given away too much! The end.
Story Three: Once Upon a Time: Once upon a time, …wait. Hold up! I just realized something. What does ‘once upon a time’ even mean? Everyone knows of this classic phrase, but does anyone actually interpret it? Perhaps I, word by word, can interpret this odd saying?
Once. Apparently, all of the tales that begin this way are only to happen once. Why not twice? I don’t know. I suppose that would be ‘twice upon a time,’ which doesn’t have that… pizzazz to it. I see why they chose ‘once’ instead. Or maybe it’s not even about time. Maybe there is a man named Once that does something?
Upon. Maybe, at the beginning of every story, the man named Once sits upon something. Perhaps it’s like a ritual? Before any crazy, fantastic tale can happen, Once has to sit on something. Or, if we are to go with my numeral-based theory, it could be different! If we go along with this, someone must have figured out how to take the adverb ‘once’ and give it physical form, so it can sit upon something. Either way you want to think, someone’s got to sit on something. How… exciting. Yay.