Abner gets turned into a Rutabaga by Dan Schwartz

(Story part of The Many Mini Adventures of Abner the Gopher)

One fine afternoon, Abner, the traveling gopher, was casually walking down a dusty road, when hunger pangs struck him. Abner stopped, removed his thick glasses to relieve some pressure on the ridge of his nose, and looked around. Abner noticed, not too far off was a farm. Abner made his way towards the farm, intending to find a fresh feast waiting for him.

Abner arrived at the fields and he had his choice between lettuce, strawberries, and carrots, and obeying his palate, Abner went for the carrots. Abner sat on a nearby log and enjoyed his snacks, eating one after another. The gopher was as happy as could be without a care in the world, until one of the carrots from his pile, stood up and stumbled its way towards him.

“Monster,” the carrot, who was wearing long dangling earrings, a jewel encrusted headband and frayed cloth, hissed at the unsuspecting gopher. “You know not of what you have brought upon yourself.”

Shocked and apologetic, Abner apologized, “I apologize, I was just hungry and needed to nosh.”

“Fool, you just needed to nosh, you just destroyed an entire gypsy clan,” the carrot reprimanded.

“I guess I will go grab some lettuce then,” Abner said, still crewing on a carrot.

“The damage has already been dealt, and in return you shall reap what you sow,” the gypsy carrot told, while muttering what sounded to be gibberish under his breath, before lying down and shriveling up.

“How do I always place myself in these predicaments?” Abner questioned as he rested his head on the log, feeling tired, and needing a nap. “Just a little break.”