I reach for the wallet and take out a Visa card. Some of that male enhancement might come in handy. Size matters, right?
Hmm, Cialis or Viagra? Hell, I'll get both. A two month supply of each ought to do it for starters. Better yet, make it three. What good is enhanced masculinity without staying power? The web site has a Russian domain. Or is it Romanian? Doesn't matter, it looks legit.
And this personals site looks interesting. Gotta put the enhanced masculinity and staying power to good use. I sign up for a full year membership. Time enough to meet a lot of "hot and sexy singles."
Oh, here's a good one. "Completely cleanse your colon." Good idea. I don't want to be full of... well, you know. I put this one on the MasterCard, give the Visa a bit of a rest.
There's an email from Nigeria. Apparently I have an opportunity to earn an easy $20 million just for helping a former government official get $200 million out of the country. I respond to his email. Just to save time, I include all the relevant information with my reply: name, mailing address, social security number, bank account number, and so forth. I figure it'll save him the trouble of him sending me another email to get the info.
"Repl 1ca" watches, discount jewelry at wholesale prices, cheap pharmaceuticals; I order them all from multiple websites, with domains from Russia, Nigeria, Romania, Indonesia, and Malaysia. I use Visa, MasterCard, Discover, and electronic transfers from a checking account.
I look at my watch and notice that it's lunch time. I gather up the credit cards, social security card, driver's license, and the checking account deposit slip and put them back into the wallet. I put the wallet in my pocket and head downstairs. I leave the building and head toward Enzo's deli across the street. Damn good sandwiches there. Capicola and provolone on a hard roll sounds like a plan.