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What others are saying about Love and Pornography


This book is a stunningly honest and in-depth account of one couple's struggle with their radically different attitudes about the use of porn in their marriage. It is insightful for anyone unfamiliar with this issue and immensely useful for any couple whose relationship is affected by porn. Compellingly written, it will leave you cheering for this brave couple and inspired to work through any of your own similar conflicts.”

-- Susan Page, author, How One of You Can Bring the Two of You Together and Why Talking Is Not Enough


This book is an amazing account of a couple struggling with a very real modern day dilemma. More than that, it demonstrates through their own story, love, courage and communication. You could replace the word "pornography" with many other issues that challenge couples and learn a lot from this work. Victoria and Garry share their vulnerability so that others may benefit from their dedication to the process of Nonviolent (or open-hearted) Communication. Bravo!!!!!!!!

-- Amazon reader “Sunshine Sunshine”


I found myself absorbed in the reading of this book, impatient to know how the next chapter would unfold. It is not just about pornography and relationship. It is about the deep process of uncovering the relationship between our values, such as freedom and choice, and the options we have for fulfilling them, while also acknowledging the values of our loved ones. It is about the application of the process of Nonviolent Communication, also known as Compassionate Communication, to the nitty-gritty of daily life in partnership.

-- Amazon reader “out here in California”


I was inspired reading how Victoria and Garry worked with the issue of pornography without falling into blame and shame. Instead, they explored their feelings and the needs each was hoping to meet. This process added to the intimacy, honesty and integrity in their relationship. I especially enjoyed the sections where each of them told what was going on inside and the dialogues between the two of them. The book gives real life examples of approaching a difficult situation from the point of view that everything we do is trying to meet needs. I took away a clearer sense of how to use that in my own life and a longing to enter relationships from this compassionate place.

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