Lorraine Ray

Biography

Lorraine Ray is the author of comedies, mysteries and short story collections. She married an Englishman and has spent several summer vacations with her husband and daughter tramping across the South Downs avoiding sheep droppings. She lives in Tucson, Arizona. Besides writing, one of her favorite jobs was a two-year stint as a lunch lady! She used that job to help her write a book about cafeteria workers who go gold mining. If you like to laugh, and you have a slightly warped view of the world, it's entirely possible that you would appreciate her books.

Books

What's Your Major Malfunction?
Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 47,420. Language: English. Published: October 2, 2023 . Categories: Fiction » Literature » Literary
Enjoy a bevy of stories about human foibles. Meet an amiable young man's whose chance at romance is ruined when he repeats a story. Sit at the campfire and watch graduate students battle over their dissertation ideas. Get trapped at a cult ranch with a young woman. Life is more fun with a book of lively fiction on the nightstand.
Elditha P. Warner, Vigilante at Large
Price: Free! Words: 60,710. Language: English. Published: June 12, 2020 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Eccentric socialite Elditha P. Warner's laser-like focus on injustice spawns disaster.
Hollywood Worm Chronicles
Price: Free! Words: 40,000. Language: English. Published: May 3, 2019 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Marathon Studios flounders while producing an unintentionally hilarious sword and sandal film.
Familiar Artifacts
Price: Free! Words: 51,260. Language: English. Published: October 26, 2018 . Categories: Fiction » Anthologies » General, Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Attention, suspense fans! These twelve tales contain witches, liars, and murderers. They are specially crafted to jolt you out of the mundane. Proceed with caution!
Hemlock Stravenue
Price: Free! Words: 63,910. Language: English. Published: May 25, 2018 . Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » Amateur sleuth
The dusty streets of South Tucson hide dangerous secrets for a young detective determined to investigate a mysterious neighborhood death.
What Remains of Teddy Redburn
Price: Free! Words: 24,560. Language: English. Published: May 26, 2017 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy, Fiction » Mystery & detective » General
The disappearance of a multi-millionaire in the small town of Los Hombres triggers a comic and horrifying search for his briefcase stuffed with cash.
Dastardly
Price: Free! Words: 60,160. Language: English. Published: January 27, 2016 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General, Fiction » Romance » General
Impoverished author Marc Viglietti languishes in his job at a rodeo parade museum while he dreams of fame and fortune from the ridiculous vampire westerns he can't stop penning.
A Phantom Herd
Price: Free! Words: 100,040. Language: English. Published: February 21, 2014 . Categories: Fiction » Literature » Literary
Nostalgic for a lost America? Was Chester from Gunsmoke your first crush? Visit the desert Southwest circa 1960 as refugees from Indiana and Ohio cope with cacti and tamales, and a family of kids lie and bluster their way through a frightening adult world. A gentle novel full of wonder and beauty. This is the first novel in a two-part series.
Trombones Can Laugh
Price: Free! Words: 52,680. Language: English. Published: September 12, 2013 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Teen loner James Sauerbaugh wants nothing more than a chance to get his act together, when the Forces That Be land him in a Shriner band as a substitute trombonist. James discovers this band of decrepit drunks play circus screamers flawlessly. An ancient trombonist helps him develop an appreciation of the coots and their Shriner mission. Enjoy a fun adventure with a goofy band in 1970s Arizona.
Genuine Aboriginal Democracy
Price: Free! Words: 50,390. Language: English. Published: November 9, 2012 . Categories: Fiction » Anthologies » Short stories - single author
(5.00 from 1 review)
Live life dangerously; delve into these quirky tales. Flee to a reservation with an emeritus professor of archaeology. Snuggle kittens at a consciousness-raising under the critical eye of a crabby host. Freeze in place as rattlesnakes slither across a field at a gathering of Girl Scouts. Evade a demented stalker on your first day of work. Get engrossed in this world of short fiction.
Last Days in the Desert
Price: Free! Words: 26,980. Language: English. Published: May 31, 2012 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(4.00 from 1 review)
Stacie, Tiffany and Yadira hope to shut down their rental house and get back their security deposit before leaving town, but first they have to fix the gaping hole in the adobe wall and rid themselves of unwanted graduation "presents," both the result of an uproarious final party. This comic co-ed romp will keep you chuckling.
Juan and Willy
Price: Free! Words: 28,840. Language: English. Published: March 16, 2012 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Who hasn't dreamed of finding gold? After Juan and Willy are fired from their jobs as car detailers at a dealership, a desire for gold possesses them. Locating a lost mine, however, means they have to outsmart a kid, a huge challenge for this pair. Of course, abandoned mines aren't safe places either, a fact especially true for these sorry, but sweet, friends.
I Want My Own Brain
Price: Free! Words: 22,380. Language: English. Published: November 10, 2011 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
When you’ve lost your way in the adult world, what you need is a weekend with an irrepressible child like Stephanie Falls! She’ll remind you of what it means to be truly alive. Stephanie makes a monkey of everyone, including her doting grandparents, but her joy for life unburdens her depressed aunt. A tribute to the importance of finding the child inside.