Who am I? Well, I have been described as, or likened to: Napoleon Bonaparte, Napoleon Dynamite, Jesus, Hitler, a goat, a character called “the Fool” (a cross between Buddha, Capt Jack Sparrow, and a drag queen as far as I can tell), a dark horse, a small aggressive parrot, a free spirit, a genuine gentleman, a dick, a woman, a grey man (the guy who looks like a nobody but actually has an AK47 in his pants), a teetotaller, a drunk, an emo, a realist, some Arab guy, an Italian, a Frenchman, an effing foreigner, a true patriot, that dude from Evermore, a serial killer, your friend whose name I do not share and have never met (I don’t know you okay so stop treating me like you do, it's creepy, who are you?), a homeless man, a senile Jedi knight, a Trojan (either the horse, the virus, the people who got slaughtered by the Greeks, a condom, or a crazy mofo battler. I don’t really know), a large purple safety mascot, a fast bastard, a cheap bastard, a bastard, an intellectual sponge, an actual sponge, funny (as in strange funny), funny (as in ha ha funny), cute, creepy, and impressive. If you can make any sense of this then you’re doing better than me.
Where to find Smiley Blackmore online
The Moon is Cheese: Correspondence of a science abuser
“Money, power, ideology, what is all this to me? I am an artist. My only interest is in painting the world anew for my patrons - a world in which we were all created yesterday, we can trash the planet with impunity, and the moon is made of cheese.” Welcome to the mind of an evil genius. His handiwork is all around us. You’d never believe the moon was made of cheese... would you?
Blackmore's Compendium of Stigma Disorders
Are you depressed? A wee bit bonkers? Are you sick of all the messed up comments that are forever flying your way from friends, family, and all the rest? Then you need this book! This madcap guide will allow you to diagnose and treat all the insanities that befall normal people whenever they are confronted by mad people. You’ll never feel the same again about being told to “snap out of it”!
The Secret to Certainty: How to be right about everything in five easy steps
Sick of being proved wrong? Tired of being a doubting Thomas? Suffer no more! The secret is out and you too can learn to believe like a pro. In five simple steps you'll learn the tricks of the trade used by every committed champion of every cause.
Believed to be recommended by religious leaders and politicians the world over, the Secret to Certainty will no doubt change your life.