Jon Burr

Biography

I am an adventurer, a writer, and a college professor. Though my work tends to cross genres, it will generally always include a certain degree of humor, adventure, and fantasy. I enjoy reading almost anything by Stephen King, Thomas Hardy, Henry David Thoreau, and Algernon Blackwood.

Here are some recommendations regarding the works I've uploaded to this site:

Coming of Age: Woolly

Comedy Horror: Puffin Panic, Jump Rope and DIE, and Beaver Dam (check out the following hilarious review of this story by karen on Goodreads.com: https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/609687279)

Fun/Humor: Jump Rope and DIE, The Knights of Vicksburg, and any of the "Versus . . . " installments

Imaginative/Sports: Universe Cup

Short Story: Empty Storage

Horror/History: I've uploaded three parts of a Vampire Presidents series called Domestic Tranquility, and they are my most popular writings. That said, it takes a lot of time to do the necessary research to achieve *some* degree of historical accuracy (yeah, I know, these are vampire stories . . . ), and feedback has been negative to non-existent, so, for now, the series is discontinued. If you want more, please leave a review indicating as much, and I'll get it going once again. My original plan was to go from George Washington all the way to Barack Obama. Not an undertaking I want to take on without some major support.

Fantasy: Hraun's War and The Knights of Vicksburg

Where to find Jon Burr online

Facebook: Facebook profile

Books

Hraun's War
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 50,030. Language: English. Published: June 30, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
Like many boys, Hraun enjoyed the thought of war. Weapons were interesting, and battle flags were colorful and beautiful. His war fantasies, however, were stronger than most and bordered on obsession. In the city of Dunning Cove with its delicate balance between the ruling class and the trolls living in the underworld, his obsession leads him on an adventure that will change the city forever.
Puffin Panic
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 50,110. Language: English. Published: June 20, 2014. Category: Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Puffins are good at a handful of things: squawking, fishing, hopping, and looking adorable. Who doesn't love puffins? I would guess that anyone who has had a finger lopped off or been speared by a colorful beak doesn't love puffins. In this humorous short novel, the feud between man and puffin is played out in full. Who will survive the war of beaks and feathers? Find out in Puffin Panic!
The All-American Sasquatch
By
Price: Free! Words: 3,820. Language: English. Published: May 30, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
In this short story, Alta, a Sasquatch discovered in the North Carolina mountains, is poked, prodded . . . and blasted to the Moon. The space race has recommenced!
Jump Rope and DIE
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 54,200. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2014. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Football, baseball, and basketball are competitive sports. Fair enough. Jump rope, however, is a cutthroat sport, a sport where murder is trivial and any action that takes one's team closer to the top is a good one. This short novel is an entertaining, ridiculous, and over the top exploration of Lewiston's competitive jump rope circuit. Will anyone survive? Find out in Jump Rope and DIE!
Dragon, Alien, Wendigo, Sasquatch: First Experiments
By
Price: $1.25 USD. Words: 21,120. Language: English. Published: April 4, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
This is the comprehensive beginning of the Dragon, Alien, Wendigo, Sasquatch series (DAWS). Written from the perspective of nine different scientists at CC Scientific Laboratory, these experiments explore the origins of the DAWS Tactical Unit, the greatest, most magnificent, and thrilling combination of powers, knowledge, and abilities known to exist on Earth.
Wendigo Versus . . . Fried Chicken, Coffee, Melodica
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,160. Language: English. Published: April 4, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
The CC Scientific Laboratory was completed in 2050 and is a storehouse for mysterious creatures. As part of the observation process, every creature is made to interact with a variety of objects, some of which are mundane and others of which are peculiar. This report provides results for the Wendigo's interactions with fried chicken, coffee, and a melodica.
Dragon Versus . . . A Snowman, A Giant Teddy Bear, Candy Coins, Gems, and Jewelry
By
Series: Dragon Versus . . ., Book 1. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,080. Language: English. Published: March 29, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
The CC Scientific Laboratory was completed in 2050 and is a storehouse for mysterious creatures. As part of the observation process, every creature is made to interact with a variety of objects, some of which are mundane and others of which are peculiar. This report provides results for the dragon's interactions with a snowman, a giant teddy bear, and candy coins, gems, and jewelry.
Alien Versus . . . A Cat, A Ghost Pepper, The Ingredients to Make Cookies
By
Series: Alien Versus, Book 1. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,380. Language: English. Published: March 28, 2014. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » General
The CC Scientific Laboratory was completed in 2050 and is a storehouse for mysterious creatures. As part of the observation process, every creature is made to interact with a variety of objects, some of which are mundane and others of which are peculiar. This report provides results for the alien's interactions with a cat, a ghost pepper, and the ingredients to make cookies.
Sasquatch Versus . . . A Japanese Massage Chair, Surströmming, A Sculpture of Barack Obama
By
Series: Sasquatch Versus, Book 1. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,890. Language: English. Published: March 27, 2014. Category: Fiction » Science fiction » General
The CC Scientific Laboratory was completed in 2050 and is a storehouse for mysterious creatures. As part of the observation process, every creature is made to interact with a variety of objects, some of which are mundane and others of which are peculiar. This report provides results for the Sasquatch's interactions with a Japanese massage chair, Surstromming, and a sculpture of Barack Obama.
The Knights of Vicksburg
By
Series: Jovial Tales. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 58,670. Language: English. Published: February 3, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
With Vicksburg being ripped apart by an ongoing war between feuding biker gangs, Jameson Jenkins and his moped riding, hobbyist friends were the town's only hope. Given their strong imaginations and a particular fascination with knights, wizards, dragons, and being awesome, they had everything that they needed to rescue their beloved hometown.
Universe Cup
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 39,340. Language: English. Published: November 18, 2013. Category: Fiction » Young adult or teen » Sci-Fi & fantasy
When Xvadi stepped from the Red Box--the Kellian mother ship--into the Oval Office, President Davidson knew that the future of the Earth was in question. Once he learned that the Kellians were challenging the planet to a soccer tournament called the Universe Cup, the wheels began to move and the greatest soccer team to ever play was assembled. Will the Earth be saved? Can aliens even play soccer?
Vampire Thomas Jefferson
By
Series: Domestic Tranquility, Book 3. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,120. Language: English. Published: May 20, 2013. Category: Fiction » Historical » USA
The story continues as Benjamin Franklin Bache's life takes an unexpected turn, and Tobias Lear's growing power is unleashed. "Vampire Thomas Jefferson" is the third part of Domestic Tranquility, a long series intertwining American presidents with vampirism.
Vampire John Adams
By
Series: Domestic Tranquility, Book 2. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 4,420. Language: English. Published: March 8, 2013. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Historical
(1.50)
"Vampire John Adams" is the second part of Domestic Tranquility, a long series intertwining American presidents with vampirism. In this installment, Tobias Lear confronts President Adams with startling knowledge about George Washington. Due to the emergence of a famous inventor and the moving of the president's residence from Philadelphia to Washington, a dark, dangerous plot begins to thicken.
Vampire George Washington
By
Series: Domestic Tranquility, Book 1. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 5,220. Language: English. Published: February 26, 2013. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Historical
All was normal at the President's House in Philadelphia until a meeting with Chief Piomongo of the Chickasaws turned sour. With betrayal in the air and the future of the country in the balance, George Washington finds himself fighting a battle that he cannot win. "Vampire George Washington" is the first part of Domestic Tranquility, a long series intertwining American presidents with vampirism.
4 Stories
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 10,480. Language: English. Published: February 19, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
This volume contains three previously published short stories, a new story, and an introduction. In the newest piece, "Sweet Suburbia," Sergeant Blakely and his fellow SWAT team officers raid a neighborhood in search of drug growing operations. With a helicopter, Humvee, and thermal imaging camera at their disposal, they come across a suspicious but quintessentially suburban home.
The Other Artist
By
Price: Free! Words: 2,620. Language: English. Published: February 15, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
Deciding to respond to an “Art for Sale” ad on a whim, Robert has low expectations for what he might find. Upon arriving at the listed address, the validity of these expectations is supported by old photographs and forgettable prints on the walls. Despite this beginning, he soon finds himself in the studio of a brilliant but terribly ill artist.
Yesterday's Doughnuts
By
Price: Free! Words: 2,520. Language: English. Published: February 12, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
Glazing doughnuts by the dozen and filling them with various cremes, custards, and jellies, Nicole occasionally enjoyed her job at Sweet and Sugary Bakery. The presence of her overbearing, perfectionist boss Chef Simone, unfortunately, often turns her pleasant job into a nightmare. Searching for some way to relax during the evening after a long day of abuse, Nicole picks up a dark hobby.
Empty Storage
By
Price: Free! Words: 2,620. Language: English. Published: February 7, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
(5.00)
Big Eddie was king of the storage unit auctions. He threw around money like it was nothing and bought units regardless of their contents. After purchasing Unit 31, he thought he'd overpaid for another pile of junk. It turns out, strangely enough, that what seemed like trash could actually be treasure.
Woolly
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 20,890. Language: English. Published: February 3, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
(3.00)
Enchanted by woolly mammoths as an imaginative child, Charlie is devastated upon learning of their extinction. Despite this information, he continues to search for the majestic beast at zoos, museums, and even on his way to school. News that Icelandic scientists are close to resurrecting the species ultimately sends him on a lifelong quest to finally see a woolly mammoth in person.
Donovan the Ridiculous
By
Series: Jovial Tales. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 8,740. Language: English. Published: January 29, 2013. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
With Princess Ursula being held captive by a dragon, King Donovan must find a champion to rescue her. With no heroes stepping forward, he is forced to embark on the journey himself. Unfortunately, he has never left the luxuries of his castle's walls and must rely on a reluctant knight to read to him from an encyclopedia to identify even the most basic elements of the outside world.
In the Open Air
By
Price: Free! Words: 2,810. Language: English. Published: January 24, 2013. Category: Fiction » Plays & Screenplays » American
Age-worn, whiskey-soaked, and suicidal, Raymond's world was plummeting out of control until an unexpected visit to his farm by a traveling painter gives him a renewed sense of hope and vigor for life.
A Boy Who Loved War
By
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 18,380. Language: English. Published: January 22, 2013. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
(4.00)
Like many boys, Hraun enjoyed the thought of war. Weapons were interesting, and battle flags were colorful and beautiful. His war fantasies, however, were stronger than most and bordered on obsession. In the city of Dunning Cove with its delicate balance between the ruling class and the trolls living in the underworld, his obsession leads him on an adventure that will change the city forever.
Maid Behind the Bar
By
Price: Free! Words: 1,270. Language: English. Published: January 21, 2013. Category: Nonfiction » Travel » By region
Three travelers join an Irish farmer in his kitchen for drinks in this story of culinary discussion and cultural reflection.
Beaver Dam
By
Price: Free! Words: 16,960. Language: English. Published: January 21, 2013. Category: Fiction » Horror » General
Beavers have invaded Salem Creek. And not just any beavers. These are the rare, black-striped omnivores known as hellions that crave two things: wood and fresh meat. What will happen when thousands of the critters collectively consume the citizens and the town's buildings? Who will save Salem Creek from sure destruction?

Jon Burr’s tag cloud

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