Frankie Lassut

Biography

Frankie lives in Coventry, England. He has held many positions including children's worker, factory worker. In one warehouse the manager tried o explain how to put a coin in the drinks machine and kindly stopped the insult when informed 'I've got that bit' ... proper jobs aren't all they're cut out to be, unless it's cutting out with a pair of scissors. He has written most of his life but started to do it seriously when he was a bus driver. The job consisted of driving along in a mobile loony bin. One day he was asked if he wanted to buy some grass by a passenger, who asked for sixty quid for a small plastic pouch of the stuff. He refused and told the manager (at least he thought it was the manager, who was hard to see through the cloud of sweet smelling smoke). "Terrible! That's very expensive and not good for business" said the manager. "Not a good businessman at all" the manager carried on.
"Well, I see your point, but not too bad for a seven year old. He had a face hard enough to chop wood on, which will serve him well in the future." The job started Frankie writing seriously and the book which deals with the mad training to be able to dodge a machete (Skid Marks). There are many other books too from this disturbed mind. Seven genres in all.
Anyway, have a great day.

Where to find Frankie Lassut online


Books

Marvo The Magical Plumber
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 9. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 12,570. Language: English. Published: July 12, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
This short story, Marvo the magical plumber, inspired by Woody Allen, was written for an adult audience, (not that it contains anything sexual or violent), but it may also make a good children’s story. The problem could be and, it’s worse than those specific content problems ... if the child asks the adult to explain the word (words actually) ‘.
P.o.r.e 4: Shopping for Mumbo Jumbo
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 8. Price: Free! Words: 8,820. Language: English. Published: July 10, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Healing
Shopping for Mumbo Jumbo? What that really means is, having an interesting time and even an amusing time shopping. That’s because wellbeing, or ‘mumbo jumbo’ really means, feeling good. That’s your purpose on earth, to come here on ‘holiday’ and have a good time. When we feel good, it’s called wellbeing (mumbo jumbo). So, come hear some shopping stories. It’s ok, they’re free.
The Story of The Black Grouse
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 8,920. Language: English. Published: July 9, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » General
The Black Grouse is an English hero in Scotland, helping out where the Scottish can’t, mainly due to their love of barley based refreshments. With his team, not only does the Grouse perform well at the Highland games, but also in his mission. The villains are English too, a right mad duo, but are sorted out by the grouse and his friends. The real villain is a Scot,
Shelley and Stoker
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 18,230. Language: English. Published: July 8, 2014. Category: Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Mary Shelly and Bram Stoker, two great icons who had the human ability ‘afforded’ to some ... the ability to love what they did. Writing though, to both of them was a beloved hobby. Mary Shelley was a maker of things such as tissue boxes, from seashells, so she was self employed and wasn’t normal because she didn’t have a proper job. Her seafront shop was called Shelly’s Shelly Stuff.
England's Ultimate Goal
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Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 12,050. Language: English. Published: July 8, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Mental health
England win the World Cup at long last and also at long last, the fans are happy as are most of England. In wellbeing terms though, happiness begins within. That’s always a bitter pill to swallow for people unfamiliar with wellbeing, ‘like attracts like’, and so one must feel good in order to get good. What about when one feels bad to get good, as football fans usually do?
P.o.r.e. 2 & 3
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 7. Price: Free! Words: 16,680. Language: English. Published: July 4, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Mental health
PORE 2 looks at those annoying people, you know, those who are lucky.Everyone I’ve asked ‘believes’ in luck, but that’s the only word they have to describe that state of being. Luck must work a bit like gravity, PORE 3 looks at a couple of ideas regarding deforestation i.e. how to feel good and appreciate it, and more importantly ‘why’.
Skid Marks
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 24,640. Language: English. Published: June 29, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Biography » Autobiographies & Memoirs
The three stars lined up vertically and to the naked eye, looked like lights in a block of flats. The vertical celestial line up was directly above Coventry bus station and was an indication from the Lyra Constellation several light years away. This special line up was telling the people of the West Midlands (and England, probably the world) that the greatest bus driver was to start his training.
The Wing
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Price: Free! Words: 18,870. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2014. Category: Fiction » Adventure » Action
It’s about this woman who does something really clever which goes a little awry, which is a good job, because if it didn’t there would be no story. I’m not one for giving plots out, so just read the thing. I see actors on TV from soaps and new films who aren’t allowed to say anything, so I’ll keep my mouth shut.
P.o.r.e. 1
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 6. Price: Free! Words: 9,450. Language: English. Published: June 5, 2014. Category: Fiction » Inspirational
This is a little handbook on life, which isn’t packed with mumbo jumbo stuff. It won’t make you thin or rich or stop you a smoking, which is good because hospitals need patients, they’re their life’s blood (especially in haematology). The little widgy book logically supposes a few weirdo things and, contains some hyperbolic humour. The main logical question isn’t one that is usually asked in pubs.
Smiles
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 30,640. Language: English. Published: May 24, 2014. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
We know smiles are hard to come by and we could easily say ‘well, yes, it’s hard to smile because of what’s going on in the world ... but, people have been saying that for a very long time. The way we figure is, if you can smile in the times when it seems to be a difficult face contortion and an even more difficult image for the mind to play host to; your amusement is our intention.
The Secret Life of Hospital Food
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 5. Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 19,270. Language: English. Published: April 27, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Diseases / heart
Have a stroke, it’s easy when you know how. Sit in a bed on a hospital ward and decide whether you should be angry or downhearted or feel blessed. Sit there for hours on end with only a wall and other almost completely stroke-disabled patients to look at. s it a good thing? Is it a bad thing? How is your perspective controlled?
Dragons’ ‘DEN’
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Price: $2.50 USD. Words: 13,850. Language: English. Published: February 22, 2014. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Dennis Brown is man whose mind’s connection to the Universe is a bit too good for this world. He’s a fish out of water. He’s lovely and helpful and wants a good life for himself and those close to him and the only way he sees of producing that personal scenario
Housework’s Invisible Gold
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Price: $3.50 USD. Words: 25,940. Language: English. Published: February 19, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Personal Growth / General
like having babies, housework is really for women only; blokes won't do it. i'm, not saying that's right or wrong. what i'm saying is that women take the attitude they take because of a lack of understanding. this book is therefore, for women only.
Cheermotherapy
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 4. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 26,340. Language: English. Published: February 10, 2014. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Healthcare issues
People are so scared by this cancer ‘condition’ they get angry and offended at its very mention. People who hate their lives and there are many walking amongst the crowds of happy people in towns and cities, do not help themselves by additionally fearing this dark cloud. Our plague, cancer, we are told is very ‘evil’ ...
Sharpo's Town
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Price: $2.10 USD. Words: 46,340. Language: English. Published: January 16, 2014. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Urban
This is a true story, except for the bit’s that aren’t. Don’t be fooled. The bits that you think ‘are’ true, probably aren’t and the bits that you think aren’t true ... probably ‘are’ (probably). Anyway, saying that ... here is a recipe for your enjoyment. For your very own amusement fiasco stew.
Mr Paganini
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 21,620. Language: English. Published: December 23, 2013. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Parody
Part 1. It’s the author’s birthday! Time for blank chequebook celebration which include, hog roast, champagne and fireworks ... ‘not’. Someone feels sorry for him and leaves a gift on his step, which will be nice to open at his solo party. The gift though is mega and changes his life. Part 2 tells of the darker, sinister side of the guitar. You probably won’t believe it.
Close Encounters in Cannington
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 21,660. Language: English. Published: December 7, 2013. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Starting in 1976, until its end in 1993, an event which took place in the agricultural college in Cannington, near Bridgewater, Somerset, stopped ‘local’ aliens from landing there and having a good time ‘researching’, which they had previously enjoyed. This true story is suitable for musicians and music lovers. It isn’t suitable for classical guitarists at all.
The Atomic Shepherd
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 8,820. Language: English. Published: December 5, 2013. Category: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
Each year, the World’s Biggest Liar competition is held at the Bridge Inn at Santon Bridge, way up there in the wilds of the Cumbrian North West of England. Whoever tells the most convincing lie gets the trophy.The book is also filled out with several other stories all suitable for the competition ... the 2013 winner is shown, but not his story of course.
A Little book of Mumagination
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 3. Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 4,090. Language: English. Published: November 13, 2013. Category: Fiction » Holiday » Family
This small book is designed to be read by mums. Hopefully if they like the short imaginative stories, they can then adapt the stories and tell them, in their own words to their child/children using the pictures.Goes hand in hand with Super Nature Imagination and Imagination City, Broken Toy and Thing hospital. Imagination is a powerful tool, nowadays used by sports and businesses alike. Introduci
Imagination City
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 2,710. Language: English. Published: November 9, 2013. Category: Fiction » Children’s books » Imagination & Play
I happen to enjoy finding broken and abandoned toys and things on the floor, picking them up, and giving them some time in my hospital before finding them somthing to do ... something which they enjoy. It’s a nice hospital. Very friendly, full of smiles when the patients feel a little better after they have had a rest after being rescued. It’s nice to go for a walk, find a sad face and know that
Super Nature Imagination
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 2,360. Language: English. Published: October 24, 2013. Category: Fiction » Children’s books » Nature & the Natural World / Environment
Three stories based on a super style of nature from the imagination of the author, which is very child like and so, able to see the beauty of the world in easy to follow ‘short tale form’. The stories have a wellbeing flavour, and Frankie talks about the soul of the tree, and the friendly vibration of the pot figurine. He does all the photography too.
Four Tales of Awful Horror
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 15,390. Language: English. Published: June 16, 2013. Category: Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
This is a respectful tribute to the recently passed British horror author, the great, the well loved James Herbert. The four short stories have been written down by Frankie who channels the souls of who were great unknown British horror writers, James Turbot and Stephen Cling. October-Aurora-Sunrise
Hickory Dickory's Mouse Diner
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 3,910. Language: English. Published: May 27, 2013. Category: Fiction » Children’s books » Animals
If you have mice that are socially more refined than where you actually live, you may, if you don’t like killing mice with traps (it isn’t very nice, is it), take care of their culinary habits. We’re guessing 8-10 years with the reader age range. Maybe younger might enjoy it (if read with an adult). Adults may like to ‘borrow it and read it’?
The Fairies of Burpy Glade
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 3,260. Language: English. Published: March 6, 2013. Category: Nonfiction » Children's Books » Curiosities & Wonders
A story about some cheeky fairies that have quite an unpopular talent. Perfect for naughty children 'and' cheeky adults. We had to click the fiction button, but, is the story actually 'fiction'?
Jeremy Kyle - King of the Chavs
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Series: Fun and Fantasy, Book 22. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 20,640. Language: English. Published: January 29, 2013. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Jeremy Kyle (famous British broadcasting personality) becomes King of the Chavs (the underprivileged) through his morning TV show, and sets about matching chav babies with fathers (God even stresses over the thought of that one), and achieving 100% proper job rate amongst the same fathers (God? Don’t even go there). As good a Monarch as he is, Jeremy forgets one vital need of his people.
The Tipsy Trip
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 21,290. Language: English. Published: January 11, 2013. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Frankie has quite a good sense of humour, which on occasion, can raise a smile on people's faces. Since writing a book about his old home town, Millom's strange history, he decided to extend the view to include the rest of Cumbria.
SPC Jones & The Plobster
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 11,330. Language: English. Published: December 31, 2012. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Looking back, Frankie seems to remember that this funky little piece was a present for Jenny. She seemed like an interesting lady, and he thought he would record a snippet of her life as a Frie-Ography, a friend biography. At the time, she ‘was’ a Special PC, a lady of money making ideas, a supermarket worker, and a keen weekend fell walker and climber in Wales and the English Lake District.
The Gift of Dementia
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 26,230. Language: English. Published: August 16, 2012. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Mental health
The people of the world plod along ... and plod along.People are conditioned into ways of life that don’t ‘work’, yet they keep on doing them and keep on doing them, but they don’t work, so they just keep on repeating them, but they don’t work so ... try again. And the same things happen, but we can’t fix them and neither can the people who we give our trust and hope to in order to fix them.
The Music of Your Life
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 18,110. Language: English. Published: June 30, 2012. Category: Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Confidence and self-esteem
For women only (men just don’t get it ... it isn’t soccer or baseball), Do you like your life? Do you know that everything in the Universe vibrates? Did you know that this means you live in an active musical symphony? Did you know that you are a musician in this symphony? Did you know that the music you produce attracts your reality (part of the symphony)?.Read all about it!(I shouted that).
Irreverent Distraction No.6, Beware of the Scientists
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 6,910. Language: English. Published: April 3, 2012. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Satire
You read in the paper; ‘drinking red wine may cause cancer, say scientists’ ... so you analyse your red wine intake (and cut down). One month later, you read; ‘red wine may not be a cause of cancer, say scientists’ ... so you up your red wine intake, because you’re ok to do so now ... you’ve been given the all clear by the ‘experts’. But wait! Your ‘red wine soup’ causes cancer ... again
A Hand in Horror
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 9,100. Language: English. Published: March 24, 2012. Category: Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
Strangely enough, this could almost be looked at as a love story, between men, but certainly not gay (not that there is anything at all wrong with gay). It is not written as a love story, but the writings contained are from two would be teachers, to their undisputed ‘heroes’, written in an attempt to make their heroes even greater. Can a teacher love a pupil?
Wot's the Matter
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 10,310. Language: English. Published: February 15, 2012. Category: Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Personal Growth / Memory Improvement
When you look at the world, you could be excused for thinking, ‘what an awful place’, because of all the things that are happening both to you, and to other people ... few are going to explain that this is a trick, played by yourself, on yourself. Science will try and bamboozle you, religion will flummox you, and ,may even fill you with fear ... over ‘nothing’.
Absurd Tales from the NHS
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Price: $3.49 USD. Words: 20,720. Language: English. Published: January 18, 2012. Category: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Black comedy
The NHS in Britain is in crisis, so this should be an interesting read for those who like hospital dramas. I'm an outsider, but the people from the NHS who have read it have said ... "Too close for comfort." Some from other walks of life have said ... "Well that sounds about true."
The Little Pink Well Being Bible (For Women Only)
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Series: Wellbeing, Book 1. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 11,450. Language: English. Published: January 14, 2012. Category: Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Confidence and self-esteem
This offering is ‘how to remember you’re a special woman’. All woman are special, they just don’t realise it. Women populate the earth. Men impregnate them, but, that isn’t necessary; the Bible tells us that, twice at least (if you choose to believe that). So, men are there to lift heavy weights and move stuff. This handbook is therefore for women and their children. It consists of some useful wisdom, and some great reasons why you should all have massive, female, self-appreciation.
The Hidden History of Robin Hood and his Merrie Men
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 18,560. Language: English. Published: January 3, 2012. Category: Fiction » Historical » Medieval
Blimey. And you thought they robbed the rich and gave it to the poor? Mind you, they didn’t actually get on very well with the sherriff, but still, they had a really good time when they pooled their various talents. Marian? She had a ‘really’ good time. Now has a new fun 'evil' section on witchcraft ...
Where There's a Will...
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 12,480. Language: English. Published: December 30, 2011. Category: Fiction » Horror » Weird fiction
This is the revised and updated version of A Flower in the Attic. It consists of two horror stories, and two sort of fantasy/mystery stories, both inspired by small events. I hope you enjoy them. Where there’s a will deals with a troublesome mother. Warm your cockles deals with growing cockles, and dangerous animals. A Nice Romantic Man? I hope you enjoy a good love story.
Tits Up
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Series: Fun and Fantasy, Book 14. Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 16,430. Language: English. Published: December 20, 2011. Category: Nonfiction » Science and Nature » Environment
Quiet self time is liquid gold time, it is so very precious. No quiet time, and noise prevails inside the human, and that’s the invite to madness, and in many cases, the doorway to the world of therapy. It’s not enough for sleep to be the only escape from an increasingly insane world. Silence is golden. Silence is our true nature.
The Return of the Pied Piper
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Series: Fun and Fantasy, Book 8. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 33,500. Language: English. Published: November 6, 2011. Category: Fiction » Anthologies » Transgressional
I finish work for a few days, and get scared because I then didn’t have anyone to think for me. I go up North, but break down on the motorway. I am going to have to pay for a tow or a repair, but my credit card overhears and doesn’t like what it overhears. Why am I going anyway? My mother just spends a couple of days nagging me. Join me on my strange adventure.
Bonfire Night at the Old Country Manor
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 2,290. Language: English. Published: September 18, 2011. Category: Fiction » Children’s books » Animals
A short story in a style called 'Adulchi' for parents to read with thier young children or for older children to read by themselves. The story covers the Bonfire Night party that happens on November the 5th each year in England at an old country manor. The resident animals enjoy thier own party in thier own way.
Mind Shift, The Beautiful Art of Inn - vention
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Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 9,770. Language: English. Published: August 9, 2011. Category: Fiction » Holiday » Humorous
INN Ventions are inventions that have been devised in the surroundings of a pub somewhere. There are some really good ones in this collection, one or two that make the marketplace, and even the easy formula inventors use ... ‘and’ a guaranteed way of receiving money both without working, or trying.
The Chuckling Crab
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Series: Fun and Fantasy, Book 4. Price: $1.49 USD. Words: 15,350. Language: English. Published: July 17, 2011. Category: Fiction » Holiday » Humorous
The tantalising story of the Ghost Town's (Coventry) brilliant specialised seafood restaurant, which was made to sparkle by Nim Chana, an alien. The restaurant was a legend in its own lifetime. Mouth wateringly funny!
Heart Failure
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Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 16,830. Language: English. Published: June 6, 2011. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Diseases
The real life sequel to the Tales from the NHSS. If your life is empty, uninteresting and funless? Then develop hypertension and heart failure and attract some zesty excitement. A true account from the wrong side of the canulae.
The Paprefutu
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 16,830. Language: English. Published: June 5, 2011. Category: Nonfiction » Health, wellbeing, & medicine » Vision
A personal empowement book dealing with the aptly named 'mean-time'. The Law of Attraction sets desire into manifestation but this takes time, and most hate the aptly named 'mean' time ... to their utter dissapointment ... but, remembering how to use this meantime to appreciate rather than to hate it.
Vampire Cleaning
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 20,780. Language: English. Published: May 30, 2011. Category: Nonfiction » New Age » Spiritualism
Remembering how to appreciate household chores, and realising the power they hold that can benefit your life.
Happy Juice
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 24,240. Language: English. Published: May 2, 2011. Category: Fiction » Adventure » General
(5.00)
Frankie, a past inhabitor of the Lake District in England gives a rather different view, and a way of coping with the omnipresent sheep key rings, ice cream van queues and pieces of slate with barometers set in them and models of people climbing them.
A Romantic Use of Bins
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 2,760. Language: English. Published: April 25, 2011. Category: Fiction » Romance » General
(4.50)
Jean and Colin win a prize of a romantic dinner for two as Colin in nominated Englands most romantic man. Colin prepares for a most magnificent gesture of his love for Jean...
Good Friends
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Price: $1.99 USD. Words: 2,990. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2011. Category: Fiction » Children’s books » Animals
(5.00)
A young giraffe and his mother get parted in a wood full of juicy fruit trees.
Love & Light
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Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 3,970. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2011. Category: Fiction » Romance » General
(3.00)
Two short love stories. Ideal to read whilst commuting gauranteed to soften the heart and make you smile.