This is a deep and haunting short story about youth and torment, about trying to deal with life - fighting, maybe failing. Its strengths lie in its atmospherics and the characterization, particularly the female voice, which are warm and believable.
Although the story is told in real time, the use of memory and flashback provides one with a broader, richer back-story that ties the characters, events and themes together decently, perhaps a little too implicitly.
Where it does fall short however, is that Williams has tried to force too many events and ideas into too small a space - there is massive potential here for this to be fleshed out into a more substantial novella. As such it does suffer from a pet peeve of mine - a tendency to 'list' actions - "he did, i said, they went, he said, he thought, this was, i went" - having said that, it doesn't really detract so much in this instance, as the tension in the story and the 'train of thought' style do benefit rhythmically from this rapidity of action.
All in all, this is a decent read from an author to look out for in the future.