Jay Squires

A writer, a salesman, an optimist, a dreamer. May the four always cohabit and produce wondrous progeny. His hope is that his writing, here, exemplifies that for you. He is married and writes out of Bakersfield, California.

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The recipe for the young achiever: When you sit, sit. When you stand, stand... But don't wobble. Meet an inveterate old wobbler. Decry me if you will, but, life can be more interesting among the brambles a little bit off the beaten path.

Website: http://jaysquires.weebly.com/
Twitter: @Jay_Squires
Blog: http://rantingandwarbling.blogspot.com/

dark romance    death    drugs abuse    dying    hard choices    love    marriage    paranormal   

• Two.5 from Eric on March 22, 2011
  
  After reading the two short stories and the intro to Eric's novel, I must say I enjoyed more the feeling of relaxed competence in the snippet of the novel. The short stories, in contrast, seemed a bit clipped and less natural. I did admire his restsraint in the first short story having the narrator pick up the revolver and leaving it to the reader's imagination what he might do with it. Both short stories had some typos and grammatical errors that I would prefer to comment on in an email or message board, but could find neither. On the novel you invited constructive criticism, and, while this isn't FanStory, I'd be happy to comply with your invitation: You had a who/whom error in location 401, and I'm hoping it's a typo in location 506 "...how long IS I expected to perform in this capaacity." There's a definite type in location 525, "The Church has is recent years", while in 536 you've a bit of a redundancy in "...the forest here is thick here." All in all though, I enjoyed what I read in the novel and will look forward to its polished publication.
  
• The illiterates guide to writing ebooks on March 23, 2011
  
  I read with great interest your snazzy little tract on writing, fleshing out and marketing. You did a helluva lot in few words. For that I commend you. It should help a lot of beginning writers to get their feet wet in the self-publishing business. I would like to have seen you take a little more time editing without disrupting the excellent conversationality (phew!) of your tone. Thanks for the advise. Free is nice. Jay
  
• He Stepped from My Dreams on March 28, 2011
  
  I appreciate what the author is trying to do in this vignette. Only, I think the subject deserves longer treatment. Mark has some quite evocative descriptions on the beach scene, such as the following: “Get of my island,” called the man, pointing at the water’s edge. The man abruptly stopped and towered over the girl. His short shadow plunged her face into shade. Elizabeth sensed his aggression as he hovered over her like a cloud. “Get off my island,” the man hissed for the third time. “You are trespassing on private property.” The problem, in my estimation, of such a short story involving such a lofty subject as LOVE is that there is not enough "story time" or physical space to develop the characters to be realistic personifications. This is a pity because the characters are likeable... only they're not on the stage long enough to be truly memorable.