I love to read the works of Poe and Shakespeare. I like to read the Bible as well as Science fact or fiction. My favorite genre is epic fantasy. I currently write articles about emergency pre-hospital medicine. I write short stories for family and friends. I enjoy spending time with my wife and children. My goal is to spend more time outdoors than indoors and more time at play than at work. My secret hobby is the practice of martial arts.
Interesting idea but not a very exciting story. An "antique shop" would be a better setting than the "local dump". This reads more like a description of events than a short story. Good thing for the notes so I could figure out what was being alluded to.
The first half of the book was too heavy on description and too light on conflict for my liking. The second half was better. It was well written but not thoroughly edited. I had a hard time reconciling "Blade" with the character played by Wesley Snipes (half vampire half mortal man; Blade 1998) and the character "Scar" made me think of the villain in Disney's Lion King (1994). The story itself reminded me of Fool's Errand by Robin Hobbs (another story that I would give three stars to). I liked it enough that I may read more of the series one day.
Great conflict and atmosphere. I enjoyed the story but at the end if felt a little like a cliche. A slightly different ending would have made this story even better, imho. Thanks for the free read. I will check out your other work.
**SPOILER ALERT!**This story didn't impress me. It was a story of terror but there was little conflict in the story. The terror came from the shock value. The fact that the act could be trivialized and glamorized. It might have been better if written from a different point of view. Maybe one of the characters should have been reluctant or pressured. In a story like this I'm expecting something like "The Most Dangerous Game by Richard Connell".
I read this story online and found it had a formatting issue. There were parts of the story that I could not read. The part of the story that I could read became a little monotonous but that may very well be important for atmosphere. I did find the situation humorous. It just wasn't really interesting to me.
I felt that the ending could have been stronger. The foreshadowing was very bold and threatened to ensure predictability. Even so, the story maintained conflict and mystery right to the last page. A rewrite, as mentioned by another reviewer, would improve the story but it's pretty good the way it is right now. I would recommend this story for a quick read. Thanks for offering this free short story.