Scott Crowder
Biography
I live just outside Raleigh, North Carolina. I've only been professionally published once, in last fall's edition of Flashquake online magazine, but I hope it's the start of something long term. I'm happily married, and I'm the father to two beautiful little girls, ages five and two, who will never be allowed to date boys, drive cars that are transporting boys, nor ride in cars to places where boys are present, or wear non-Amish-spinster-approved clothing in front of boys. I love horror movies, rhythmic noise, peanut butter, and the Munsters, not necessarily in that order. Please feel free to contact me if you want; I'd love to hear what you thought of the book. My e-mail address is zombieapocalypse at earthlink.net. Thanks for reading.
Where to find Scott Crowder online
Books
Ghostly Gertie and the Flying Tacos of Terror
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 1420 words.
Published on October 27, 2011. Fiction.
For the last couple of years I have written a Halloween poem for my daughters and read it aloud at our Halloween party. This is the poem I'll read this Saturday at our Halloween party, and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Happy Halloween!
Night of the Living Dead Turnips
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 1780 words.
Published on October 27, 2011. Fiction.
For the last couple of years I have written a Halloween poem for my daughters and read it aloud at our Halloween party. This was last year's and it's based on the premise that the Irish, before they came to America, used to carve jack-o-lanterns from turnips. It was only after they came to the new world that they found the indigenous pumpkin easier to use. I hope you enjoy it and Happy Halloween!
Undermeat Part 1
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 18910 words.
Published on October 14, 2011. Fiction.
Sweetly's lost everything over the years; her inhibitions and her self-respect, the love of her life and the baby he unknowingly gave her. She hopes to find someone who can avenge her in the Undermeat. Nightburners from the Undermeat ask a lot in return for jobs like this, though, and Sweetly doesn't have much to begin with.
Shattered
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 3340 words.
Published on August 17, 2011. Fiction.
The boys are young and stupid. The old man is stubborn and crotchety. This ain't gonna end well...
Black Shark Soul
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 4660 words.
Published on July 22, 2011. Fiction.
There is a black shark swimming through her; through the fluids of her sex and the saliva in her mouth, through the aqueous humor that fills her eyes and the blood that pounds mercilessly in her veins. Its great sweeping tail is always pushing her, driving her ever onward to hunt and kill and eat.
To stop is to die and it never stops.
It is always hungry.
The Queen of Carrion
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 6250 words.
Published on July 12, 2011. Fiction.
Disclaimer : This was copied from a blog I found online. All contents were removed right after I did. There's nothing there now but a terse note and a gruesome photo from someone telling visitors to go away. The posts ran from October through mid-November last year at thequeenofcarrion.blogspot.com.
Children of God
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 8960 words.
Published on June 8, 2011. Fiction.
How many ways are there to die as you hunt out here in the icy Minnesota winter? Too many: frost-bite, disease, starvation. More if you count the dead things hunting you in turn. The worst has to be the same people you'd hoped you could count as allies here at the end of the world. Hate, though, has a way of making even the end of the world seem like just another day in paradise...
Nightcrawler
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 3660 words.
Published on March 15, 2011. Fiction.
Something stalks the inhabitants of a small North Carolina town, something with an appetite that can't be sated. Two girls are forced to help it hunt for meat so that they can save their mother. Is there enough of Mom left to save, though?
Red Father
by Scott Crowder
Price: Free! 4070 words.
Published on March 15, 2011. Fiction.
Better not pout, better not cry, better not shout, I'm telling you why: the Red Father's coming, and he's the thing children fear most about Christmas night. He sees you when you're sleeping, he knows when you're awake, he knows when you've been bad or good, so for God's sake, run, even if it does you no good at all...
The House of Fists
by Scott Crowder
Price: $0.99 USD. 31600 words.
Published on January 7, 2011. Fiction.
Two cousins, bound together by the chains of poverty, happen upon something one hot summer morning that neither finds himself willing to surrender to the other. Each sees in it an escape, either from brutal squalor or crushing loneliness. They'll fight each other for it. They'll kill and die for it.
The thing they happen upon that summer morning is, after all, the body of a murdered child.
Scott Crowder’s tag cloud
Smashwords book reviews by Scott Crowder
- Voices
on May 03, 2011
I think Ms. Ericson has written a really good story here. It moves along at a good clip and I think she did a bang-up job setting the tone of Tom's confusion without confusing the reader in the process. Perhaps she could have taken a bit more time explaining the meteors that are obviously at the root of what's happening to Tom; instead of being mysterious, they are presented rather clumsily as a plot element. Ms. Ericson's style, in this piece, is a little workman-like. If she decides to go back into the story and magnify the unknown qualities of the meteors, and expand on how the world and Tom have viewed them the last few days, this might go a long way toward livening up the prose. Last but not least I have to admit that I enjoy reading a story where the author doesn't simply wrap things up in a nice little bow. She's left the reader wanting to know more about what's happened without being obtuse and intentionally trying to confuse him. All around a good strong story that with a little work could be even stronger.
- The Flesh is Not Weak
on May 03, 2011
I thought this was a really well written story. Malady and Dodd have wonderful voices that enrich the story greatly. That seemed to be the story's strong point: the vernacular of the characters. Kudos for having the cojones to let Dodd use the n-word; it's not a nice word to hear but it fits in his mouth like his own rotten teeth. The plot moves along at a fast clip. There seemed to be no rough spots in the story's flow, and the grisly hints given to us of Dodd's shack at the end were perfect. My only negative comment would be about the cover image. It really has nothing to do with the story, but of course takes nothing away from it.
- Slag Attack
on Nov. 29, 2011
I had never read any Bizarro fiction before Slag Attack came to my attention, and now I'm torn. Is Mr. Prunty the best Bizarro author there is, or is it all this good? Slag Attack is a juggernaut of a novel that hits the ground running and doesn't let up until the very last sentence, bringing us the stories of people living through the end of the world, or trying to, anyway. The stories interrelate with each other beautifully and unpredictably, leading the reader from one end of the apocalypse to the other while ordinary people become heroes, heroes become villains, and villains become robots. Mr. Prunty's imagination works in ways far beyond the ordinary writer's, making illogical and seemingly nonsensical ideas work together like the gears in a clock (the savior of mankind living in a detective's hollowed-out eye socket, a woman whose uncontrollable need to shout out the names of rock stars forestalls the apocalypse, a man who drills a hole in his own head and installs a car antenna so that he can hear what regular people can't). I'm glad I found Mr. Prunty's fiction and I look forward to reading more of it. To top it all off, it's free, at least for today, so you're doing yourself a grave disservice by not reading it immediately. Congratulations, Mr. Prunty, on such a fantastic story!
- Something Wicked...
on Jan. 12, 2012
I usually don't find the subject of coulrophobia to be particularly interesting, but I thought Mr. Mather did a very fine job of making Bojangles creepy as hell (but with all due respect, still not as creepy as Tim Curry's Pennywise the Dancing Clown!). He also does a fine job of making the story's main character, Harold Harper, sympathetic, despite the old man's questionable past, as well as building up a suitable sense of dread as the past unveils itself to him. All in all, a fine effort.
- The Tale of Noah
on Jan. 23, 2012
I thought the story was very creative, funny as hell, and I applaud Mr. Linahan for having the stones to write it. Do yourself a favor and take off your blinders, open yourself up to different view points; you'll be surprised at what you might find there.
- Kepler-22b
on Jan. 23, 2012
A taut, well-written story told with verve and care. I only wish it was longer.