By Luca Satana

Fair warning, starting back in 2015, something had become abundantly clear to everyone involved, and that was my sweet little 18-year-old daughter Ellie turns into an absolute monster when she can’t come, making me, her 44-year-old dad Harry, her 42-year-old mom Lillie, and her 20-year-old sweet not-so-little big sister Allie completely on edge and completely scared-shitless in our own home. I’m a man. I’m the man. That’s what my wife kept telling me. So, I had to do something. What the fuck is she talking about? Fuck me. So, something was exactly what I did and what I will continue to do as long as I’m a man. Or the man. You know what I mean.