A moment of silence….
On June 15th, 2015 – My mother passed away due to complications of Ovarian Cancer. She was an incredibly strong independent woman that endured a very difficult struggle with fighting this particular type of cancer. She was a very beautiful woman, who cared greatly about her children, grandchildren, neighbors, friends and extended family. She was extremely smart and very analytical about information. She loved to read, research, and support the local libraries by buying entirely too many books at their book sales. She was never able to grasp at using her ereader, but she did think that the entire idea of ebooks was incredible.
Since 2013, I have started a business with my husband, endured several major surgeries with immediate family members, and had to realize that my love of writing books for fun was something that had to be shelved for another time. As I begin the enduring process of mourning the loss of a mother who I loved deeply but often had difference of opinions with, I realized that my creative mind needed to express itself to deal with the feelings of loss. Writing is one of many creative outlets I indulge in, so I hope to have a funny mystery with a dysfunctional character soon, my mother told me before she passed that she would like that. Although my mother never read an entire book of mine, only the sample chapters on my website, we spent many hours over the phone, discussing the characters in some of my books and the crazy things that happened to them. Unfortunately for my mother, she spent more time reading about cancer, research, survivorship and religion in her years of fighting the battle. Her mind often struggled with the ‘why me’ and ‘how to live longer’. She would have liked to have spent her retirement years, enjoying her grand kids grow up, reading books, and socializing with people she enjoyed similar interests with.
I will miss the long conversations that my mother and I would have over the phone, even though I lived about an hour away, picking up the phone and talking for a few minutes, which often led to an hour, was some of my best memories with her. We would talk about so many interesting things, my characters in my books and their dysfunctional lives, always seemed to make her voice smile over the phone. I will miss her dearly, but will hold onto her voice telling me, ‘You are so creative Catt’, my nickname for my real first name.
In honor of my mother, I have chosen to have all of my books – FREE, for the month of July. For me, it has never been about the money, although it is nice to get paid for one’s hard work, but it has been about the ability to create and express, to enlighten not only my own soul, but enlighten readers with a smile.
I hope my free reads will bring smiles to many readers. CJ Hawk