Santa, You Freak

In words only a reindeer can express, Rudy the RNR riffs on the holiday season. He likes mistletoe and Christmas parties, and is a very good kisser. He's busy around the 24th & 25th of December, but other than that, he has a lot of free time, so, he looks forward to hearing from you. This book would be a nice gift even if you haven't got antlers. It's really tough to type with hoofs.

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Words: 880
Language: English
ISBN: 9781465868442
About John Blandly

There was a time when Blandly read a lot of Arthur Conan Doyle (Sherlock Holmes), Earle Stanley Gardner, James M. Cain, Ian Fleming, John LaCarre and Ross Macdonald (The Far Side of the Dollar, The Goodbye Look, The Big Sleep). He read the complete works of Arthur Conan Doyle. He thought Ross, Art and the other guys were great writers. No Time To Die is an experimental murder mystery written in the hard-boiled style of noir detective fiction. Blandly is also a fan of Gossip Girl, Girls' Guide To Hunting And Fishing, The Shopoholic, Ethan Frome, Erma Bombeck, Pride and Prejudice, and Chick Lit.

Several years ago Blandly started writing screenplays. Suddenly it seemed like a book was completed when it got to 100 pages. He put in a lot of dialogue and quick cuts, as if you were watching a fast-paced movie. So, consider yourself lucky that you have been spared a lot of narrative.

In his spare time, Blandly does nothing, since he doesn't have any.

An experimental artist and writer, John Blandly depends on the kindness of strangers. He often crashes, but finds generosity in the urban wilderness, not to mention emergency rooms. So, he frequently has good reason to be humble. Blandly supports everyone who is on a peaceful mission, and encourages them to be optimistic, and to keep trying. Every tiny success is an endorsement. If you try ten things, and one works out--it's a plus. That's his thinking. Obviously, he's no math professor.

Blandly's massive corporate front office would like to say thank you to everyone who has bought copies of his books. Other than a purchase, there is little in the way of feedback, so, when he is aware that a book is appreciated enough to buy, he is very grateful.

It is said that a prophet is not without honor except in his home town. Blandly has said, based on the sales of his books: Looks like my home town is--THE WORLD.

Lightman is based on the screenplay of the same name. Lightman doesn't really have any super powers, just fiddler crabs who help him out as he tries to win the heart of his new girlfriend, Venus.

It has been said that there is never a final version of a screenplay--just the current one. If you think your script is perfect, just pick it up in a few weeks or months. Spontaneously, it seems, typos, plot flaws, and all sorts of errors appear, as if out of nowhere. That's like an ebook. There is one way ebooks are better than printed books for a writer--you can easily revise them--edit--fix mistakes--make the book better.

The Volunteers was originally published in Studio (Australia). Blandly loves Australia and hopes some day to visit there. South America too. Finn was first published in a print version with Japanese and English in The Abiko Annual.

Love stories--that's what Blandly likes in a book or a movie. Some love stories here are Kiss Me, I'm Irish, Ace It, Girlfriends Lost, and The Volunteers. There may be others. Blah, blah, blah. Sorry if we repeat ourselves a bit. Please blame my other personality. It's hard to talk to yourself if you are only one person.

Blandly has always been interested in astronomy, and gets new books almost every year (almanacs). There are always new discoveries. The Meddlers, and Peeps deal with what might happen if there was virtual travel to nearby stars, which our onboard computer thinks will happen.

Check out Blandly's films by searching johnblandly on YouTube.

Phantom of the Art Gallery

http://www.youtube.com/user/JohnBlandly#p/u/0/XiDzQvtkbcA

Blandly resides in the wilderness of the New York frontier.
Here are some links to navigate with him!

The young adult novelette, The Volunteers, is based on a number of true stories, or more accurately, harrowing experiences.

Girlfriends Lost is completely fictional--we wish!
We do not know how to explain it right now except to say, Caesar used to write about himself in the third person, but he had far better adventures.
So, enjoy reading "The Death of John Blandly, Continued," included in this novella, and if you can figure it out, let us know, at jjbrearton@aol.com.

John Blandly and his friends, two brothers, Avant Life Guard, Avant Security Guard and their sister, Avant Point Guard, have posted articles and stories on the Internet, and have virtually collaborated on some sites, like Triond. Some of these writings are collected here.

Most of the covers of the books use photos courtesy of Freedigitalphotos.net.

http://twitter.com/blandly

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