on Feb. 13, 2015 :
Download for free here: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/43044
“You summoned him,” She cried. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what I had done. Or, how to fix it. Before I could react, she began to cry hysterically, “Why did you do it?”
I am so glad that the author sent me a copy of this book to read and review, because this was really good!
I liked Chloe/Willow, and I thought she acted appropriately when confronted with danger – she ran! This girl was no idiot, she knew that she was no match for a big guy with a sword or two and did the sensible thing and fled. No walking into danger on purpose for this girl!
“Fear trickling back into my numb body, I ran in the direction of home, hoping my mother was there so I could warn her.”
The storyline in this was really good, and I loved the action! Poor Chloe/Willow seemed to have no shortage of unexpected encounters, and I loved how I didn’t know what was coming next!
“It was him!
It was the intruder, disguised as a police officer! He had found me.”
There was some romance, and I’m guessing that some people might call it insta-love, but to be honest, although Nalin seemed to like Chloe, she didn’t immediately return the feeling, and there wasn’t any huge declarations on her part, and nothing physical at all.
“Seeing her again, even for a few fleeting moments, made my heart stop. I was overwhelmed with a feeling although I couldn’t comprehend which one. I had found my twin soul, and we were at the meeting once again.”
The ending to this was a bit of a cliff-hanger! I’m glad that the second part of this story is already available and free on smashwords! Yay!
8.5 out of 10
(review of free book)
on March 30, 2011 :
Overall, perhaps a promising story.
I have to admit, when I started reading this story, I didn't expect much. The plot and characters were typical, the narrative voice was very passive, and it is in bad need of proofreading - most notable was consistent misspelling of the word "awe." I also admit I don't see the necessity of breaking such a short story into two parts.
As I got nearer the end and the background of the story revealed itself, however, it began to sound like it could be interesting. A different approach might have suited this story better, or perhaps fleshing it out into a longer work. I'm not really compelled to read the second part of the story - again, a failing more of format than necessarily of writing - but it's possible it could have an interesting ending. I wish the author all the best in her writing, though I might suggest considering a switch to third person POV.
(review of free book)