Charlotte of Little Dean

Rated 2.50/5 based on 4 reviews
Gothic story of family secrets.
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Words: 820
Language: English
About P A Hilton

I have been writing for over ten years and I have had numerous short stories and articles published. Now I am looking to get more involved in the writing/publishing world. I served for many years in the Armed Forces of the United Kingdom, while serving I experienced many adventures and situations which to draw on for future books.

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Review by: David Blake on April 20, 2013 :
This story is described as a 'gothic thriller', but didn't match that label for me. It fails as it completely lacks detail. Take Charlotte, the main character, for instance. Um, how old is she? Is she fat or thin, attractive or ugly, clever or stupid? Does she have any friends? She's desperate to leave Little Dean, so what exactly is stopping her? Why doesn't she just run away? Why would she contemplate murdering her mother just because she craves a life in the city? Has she ever even visited a city in her life? I don't know because we're not told ANYTHING about her. The mention of 'house staff' suggests Charlotte lives in a large, affluent household, but this isn't expanded upon. In what time period is the story set, anyway? The present day? Or a period in history?

As for Little Dean - well, there's mention of dull grey Devon moors, but again we're told nothing about the place.

The twist was quite good, I didn't see it coming, but then it was hard to see anything coming when the story tells us so little. And that's all it does - tell. It never shows. There's not even any dialogue.

The idea's there, it just falls flat in the execution. With more work and skill, this could be a good story.
(review of free book)

Review by: Kristina Howells on June 20, 2011 :
A lovely little story. It was a nice read. I would recommend this story.
(review of free book)

Review by: Mark Stewart on May 31, 2011 :
I thought the story lacked finase. More detail and a few more drafts would bring it up for a great read.
(review of free book)

Review by: Ernest Winchester on May 31, 2011 :
Too short, too condensed and too simplistic.
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