Responsible Parenting: The Psychological Effects of "Quality Time"
Believe it or not, even though as a psychologist and a counselor, I learned a number of psychological terms, I was astonished when I was first confronted with the term "quality time," in regard to parent-child relationship. More
Table of Contents
The Concept of Quality Time
Background of Child Raising Down the Centuries
Psychologists and Modern - Day Parenting
1 - Have Meals Together
2 - Shopping with Family Members
3 - Hobbies and Sports
Believe it or not, even though as a psychologist and a counselor, I learned a number of psychological terms, I was astonished when I was first confronted with the term "quality time," in regard to parent-child relationship.
This book is going to be controversial, because I do not want this term quality time to have anything to do with any sort of natural relationship between a parent or a child or partners or close family members.
Why, because any relationship which is between human beings should never ever be measured in the amount of time spent with them and the feeling of guilt associated just because you neglected your family because you thought you had to do something else which held top priority in your schedule.
This book wants you to abolish that psychological term quality time from your lexicon and vocabulary. This is just the sort of psychological mumbo-jumbo and jargon, thought up by some psychologist like me somewhere in order to sound more knowledgeable and more intelligent than thou!
Along with that, I am going to talk about the long-term psychological effects of this so-called quality time on human beings, and whether you think that it is positive or negative, is going to be decided by you after you finish the book.
Quality time – also known as QT, spoken in a very proud and smug tone because after all, you are boasting to other people around you that you have taken some time out of your very very busy schedule in order to spend this time with your loved ones – is a reference to some time spend informally with them.
This naturally is a 20th century concept. And this is how a large number of parents are justifying their feelings of guilt, through neglecting their children just by saying that, well, they have done their duty to their children, because they have spent some time with them.
And during this time they did some profitable, special, important, memorable, and productive activity.
This time, which has been spent in doing this activity, where you are going to spend plenty of time giving some special matter or some special person all your attention, is called quality time.
I just hate this term, especially when parents talk in a very smug tone that they have taken out half an hour out of their very busy schedule in order to take their children to a park, this week.
I would rather those parents do not waste that half hour with their children, because one ear is going to be open for the ringing of their cell phone, with messages, and they watching the clock because they have to get back to what they consider to be the top priority job in their lives, as soon as the half hour is over.
Stop this hypocritical behavior, pretending to be a good parent. The child could do without your presence, because the rest of the time, when you do meet or when you do have time to remember that you have a child around, the attention you give him is divided and full of interruptions.
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