It'll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting

Rated 4.88/5 based on 8 reviews
An oddly feel-good, quirky, hilarious memoir. The subject matter is sometimes hilarious, sometimes tragic and always thought provoking. More

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About Lisa Orban

I had a more formal bio to begin with on here, but I'm not a very formal person. So, let's have a little fun with this, shall we?
What would you like to know? I suppose we should start with why should you care and what makes me so important that you should be compelled to spend some time with me.

Well, I am an Indie author. I write memoirs, they are dark, funny, tragic and hilarious. If you don’t feel better about your own life and your own choices after reading about my misadventures in living, I’d be surprised. I am the reigning champion of “Jerry Springer, the Home Game” after all.

Let's see, what else would you like to know? I mean, my life is pretty much an open book at this point. I guess we could start with I was born in Galesburg, IL. I had a mother and a father, they didn't really get along and that's a whole different story that would take an entire other book, and since it's not my story to tell, we'll let it go at that.

Shortly after my birth, my mother moved to Quincy, IL where I (mostly) grew up after she married husband #2. At 16, I received a brief tour of Illinois curtsey of foster care and at 18 ran away with my friend Cindy to Phoenix where I lived for three years. I returned to Quincy after my disastrous marriage came to a grinding halt, put my life back together, went to school, earned an Associate in Art in Psychology with a minor in Art. I got a job, well, I've had a lot of them to be honest, and some of them have been pretty weird, but they paid the bills.

I’m the mother of five, all of which are grown and gone except my youngest who has a few more years yet before she is let loose into society. I’ve recently become a grandmother, and I expect that will happen more often as the years go by. One of these days I’m going to write a book about my children, much to their impending regret, but that what memoir writers do, they share their lives and their stories. And let’s face it, children are ripe fodder for the funny and the tragic, often all at the same time.

I live in a house where chaos is on the menu of the day, every day. For over a decade now I have taken in people in need, the homeless, the helpless and the lost. They come to me broke, and often broken, I give them a clean slate when they walk through the door, and a place to rebuild their lives. I have taken in pregnant women, vets, ex-cons, families and many others who all have one thing in common, somewhere along the way life has pushed them down to the point that they could no longer cope, and their world collapsed around them. When they leave my house, be it weeks or years later, each of them is ready to face the world again, and have gone on to scatter across the states in search of their dreams. (My not so secret dream is that maybe one of these days I will become a moderately successful writer and finally be able to put in that second bathroom I’ve always dreamed of having. In a house of sometimes 12 or more people, that’s no small thing!)

Also, I’m pretty funny.

So, I hope you will give me a chance to make you laugh, maybe roll your eyes at me, snicker, and on occasion, maybe shed a tear as I continue to share my journey with you.

Forever hopeful...

Also by This Author

Reviews

Review by: Corrand on Feb. 27, 2017 :
“It’ll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting”, which is good to know because you will be hurting. It’s not just the terrible tragedies and senseless injustices; you’ll also be hurting from laughing so hard, and then from the crazy antics, the keen wit, and the general hilarity of a teenaged rebel, who carries some of that with her into adulthood.

Knowing the book is mostly autobiographical, I do feel a little guilty for laughing so much, but I think Lisa would want me to. Throughout her portrayal of a God-awful childhood with parents who vacillate from sheer neglect to militaristic control, you have the abiding sense that she’s going to ok. From her jail-house antics (don’t worry she didn’t do anything illegal) to her stubborn, almost masochistic refusal to play along, Lisa has a strong sense of self and a stronger sense of humor.

Perhaps that’s what makes it so hard, then, to see her later in an abusive relationship. You really want to do him bodily harm for trying to squash her amazing spirit (don’t worry, she’ll be ok), but Lisa is a survivor in every sense of the word.

While parts of the book are certainly dark and troubling, it’s never depressing. “It’ll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting” is oddly a feel-good, quirky, hilarious memoir about friendship and the triumph of the human spirit. Well written and very well done!

Cristel Orrand
Author of “Khayal” and “The Amalgamist”
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: Katelyn Jones on Jan. 5, 2017 :
I would absolutely recommend this book!!! I agree with another review that the title caught me first hand. I'm not a big reader but as soon as i started it I knew I was hooked!! I'd stay up way later than normal just so I could read one more page which turned into one more chapter. If you haven't read this yet I definitely think you should. It keeps you on the edge of your seat.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: Mike on Dec. 20, 2016 :
I'll keep this fairly short as far as reviews go. I got a copy of this book a couple weeks ago mostly because it was recommended by a friend and the title just caught my attention and gave me a chuckle first thing. I read voraciously 5-7 books a week mostly for entertainment, killing time between assignments at work. I'm telling you this so you understand that I normally don't remember most of the books that I read except for a few highlights like the odd plot twist, or a comical moment here and there. Simply put most books got to be fairly predictable. That being said I have started expanding the types of books I read, this was one of those forays into other literary realms. Ms. Orban's life has been both a rollercoaster ride and a train wreck all rolled into one. There were many times while reading this book that I tossed it down saying "I'd do that" or " come on Lisa you know that this won't end well!" and I'm not one to talk to the characters in a book. The stories are fleshed out in such a manner that you almost feel like you're there listening to a friend telling you how their weekend went sometimes bringing a tear (almost I'm a guy after all) to drawing a belly laugh out of you against your will. I will not tell you about this book, what I will tell you is it was worth every minute that I spent reading it. In some ways, I truly hope that Lisa took great liberties in the telling of these stories (but reading them, I have a feeling she did not) they are dark, and the humor is gallows humor. but she balances out those dark times with good stories that you want to make your own. As you read it you will find yourself thinking "I've done that" they're real and set in real life, and above all, relatable to everyone at least some time in their life. Enjoy your time in Lisa's world and enjoy the ride, I know I did.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: Robin Hutton on Dec. 20, 2016 :
Simply Brilliant. This is the best book that I have read it a long time. The subject matter is sometimes hilarious, sometimes tragic and always thought invoking. The narrative has a relentless pace which makes it more compelling than I could have dared to imagine. It swings between a homely, familiar tone and a breath-taking roller coaster of a read in which you cannot do anything other than wonder at the depth of character that the writer must possess in order to have come through the adventures and ordeals that she describes with such magnetic skill. I can't praise this book enough and urge you to indulge.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: Jane1960 on Dec. 16, 2016 :
I loved this book, it is well written with a gentle sense of humour shining through, despite all the pain Ms Orban has have been through. The story was told in a very simple way with no hint of self pity, at times I could relate to it, the teenage shenanigans and the darkness at the end. I look forward to reading more by this author, may I just add you are truly blessed to have such good friends.
I cannot wait to read your new book Lisa.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: millie on Dec. 11, 2016 :
“It’ll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting” is a collection of narrative essays and a brilliant debut from author Lisa Orban. Part coming-of-age, part coming-to-grips, Orban tackles growing up in dysfunctional families, foster care and transitioning into adulthood through personal anecdotes told in a brisk style that makes it hard to put the book down once you pick it up.

Orban is upfront that the reader shouldn’t dive into her world expecting resolution and recovery by the end of the book, and while this might be refreshing for cynics like myself, it's also fresh way for the optimist reader to discover beauty and inspiration from the unconventional. Orban consistently illustrates this possibility through her reminiscences of both circumstance and consequence. Although her life is an emotional rollercoaster of ups, down and twists, she manages to keep the reigns steady on chaos and retains balance between tragedy and hilarity through her tales. While some may argue that there may be peace in finding normality, Orban demonstrates how deviating from social obedience encourages us to define the world we live in by giving it meaning, and she does just that.

This is an essential read for teens and young adults, particularly those dealing with family dysfunction - and for us older folks, it helps to repair the disconnect many of us experience between adolescence and adulthood because it’s easy to forget that we’ve actually been there. “It’ll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting” is an entertaining narrative that will stay with you long after you read it.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: grady harp on Dec. 10, 2016 :
Review by Grady Harp, December 10, 2016
‘Like mist slipping through my fingers, I was once again losing myself in someone else's life.’

Illinois born Lisa Orban has walked, run, been shoved through a wild beginning life and she is here to share that life with us. Not only does she write well (as though we were sitting next to her chatting) but she opens windows onto foster care, child abuse, domestic violence, teenagers’ angst at what exactly is an ‘adult’ and yet mixes all of this grim reality into a memoir that is profoundly involving and moving - and entertaining and full of some zingers that will have you howling. And despite all this she earned an Associates of Arts in Psychology and a minor in Art. ‘Over the years she has held many jobs, but never quite found the right one. She has written poetry and short stories on a variety of subjects from raising children to finance for online publication.’ And all this crazy quilt of background she now has written as a dark comedy that is based on her life that could settle in the genres of Chick Lit, memoirs, autobiography, or Young Adult fare.

This is not a book that is tidy to review: this is a book to experience, especially if the reader has no personal connection with the roughshod traipse through childhood and young adulthood Lisa has endured – and now manages to make us laugh with her (as well as try to overcome the desire to just give her a huge hug). Example of her fortitude: ‘Marrying Billy also meant an end to all the things I had been working towards, or at least, they would have to be put on hold. My plans to attend college in the fall, something I had dreamt of for so long, would once again have to wait. My independence, something I treasured even as I groped for it, would have to be set aside in the new reality of "we".’

Or better yet, taste this: ‘I am an adult now and I didn't grow up to be a Madame of a house of ill repute. In my life, I most often resemble the ringleader in a madhouse of anarchy. But sometimes, I wistfully remember the longing for flowers, gentleman callers, and enchantment that I think all of us have had at one time or another. Whatever that childhood ideal of adult life may have been. My life is not glamorous, no high society people come to call, and any dinner party I have ever had has ended in the verbal equivalent of a food fight. But, looking back on my life I realize by and large it has been a helluva ride that I wouldn't exchange for anything. So, this is my life, for better or for worse. I hope you enjoy the ride as much as I have enjoyed the roller coaster.’

While reading this memoir a tune from ‘Sweet Charity’ comes to mind – ‘If my friends could see me now’. But we CAN read her now, and if your psyche is aching for a massage, read Lisa’s fine book. You’ll feel better.
(reviewed the day of purchase)
Review by: Stacy Roth on Dec. 10, 2016 :
It'll Feel Better when it Quits Hurting is a memoir of the author's life from childhood until probably her early 20s. The author had a lot of circumstances in life that you wouldn't wish on anyone, including a mostly absent mother who left Lisa in charge of her younger sister, a controlling father who allowed her no freedom, time in foster care, and an abusive husband. Despite these circumstances, Lisa also experienced a lot of fun and funny moments that she relates in this book.

A lot of the experiences Lisa had while growing up are simply incredible - I would have guessed them to be things that happen only in stories, not in real life. Lisa has a real gift for storytelling to go along with her adventures, and I laughed out loud several times while reading this book.
(reviewed the day of purchase)

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