Under My Roof -- A Mother's Story of the Heinous Crime of Incest--Second Edition

Rated 5.00/5 based on 3 reviews
Second Edition with Reader Conversation Guide and new Intro. It was midnight in her hell and, without realizing it, she just destroyed all the evidence...Under My Roof is a memoir written through the eyes of a mother, an RN, who discovers the terrible crime of incest has been perpetrated in her own home. This story is a mother's personal triumphant journey of discovery, tragedy, pain and healing More

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About Emalou King

Emalou King, RN, BSN, PHN is a Registered Nurse with a Bachelors Degree and a certificate in Public Health. She has worked in Hospitals, Clinics, Nursing Homes and Drug Treatment Programs. The last 16 years of King’s nursing career involved drug addicted mothers, their babies and preemies from Packard Children’s Hospital at Stanford, as well as pregnant and parenting teens from the age of twelve and up.

Under My Roof, a Mother’s Story of the Heinous Crime of Incest is a personal experience of deceit. When King started over out West, she kept her family secrets from friends, clients and colleagues because of shame and embarrassment. She hopes to convince you to believe that when a mother knows something is amiss, there is something amiss.

When a mother thinks something is wrong...something is wrong. King is a mother in pursuit of truth, justice, advocacy and education in the prevention of child sexual abuse.
King published in the Canadian Journal of Nursing, contributed to the Mosby’s textbook Pharmacological Aspects of Nursing, won the NDSNA writing contest twice and is the author of two paperback children’s books, dabbles in poetry and is interested in screenplay/script writing.

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Review by: June Smith on Nov. 7, 2011 :
I'm adding my rating here.
(reviewed 22 days after purchase)
Review by: June Smith on Nov. 7, 2011 : (no rating)
I put off reading this book for as long as I could. I know the author, so had every intention of getting to it when I found a block of time, which didn't seem to come easily, because I dreaded delving into the subject.

I finally began the book and as the saying goes, "couldn't put it down." Emalou treats the subject with as much grace as possible; in other words the crime of incest is surely there, but one can somehow tolerate the story because of the way she presents it.

Kudos to Emalou King for writing this book and continuing her crusade to help keep the innocent children of this community safe.
(reviewed 22 days after purchase)
Review by: Elizabeth Faust on Oct. 27, 2011 :
Sometimes lurking below a seemingly "normal" family life is a tangled web of deception. We want the American dream -- a home, a loving family, a perfect marriage, and relationships built on trust. We’ll do almost anything to insure that dream comes true. King's book exposes the vulnerability of a family, her family! - and a MOTHER - who discovers that the crime of incest is occurring right UNDER HER ROOF! As betrayal sets in, the slow decay of an American dream gone wrong surfaces.
As I was reading this book, I harkened back to a time in my own life when I, too, was married to a controlling, abusive man, and how I tried to ignore the signs of the potential threat to my own family. King does an excellent job portraying in detail the subtle and not-so-subtle signs of abuse and incest in the setting of the '60's, 70's and '80's -- a time period when we all expected a "Father Knows Best" kind of life.
This book would be an excellent book club candidate or a book to share with a daughter or son or friend. It opens the door to communication, not only of the subject of incest but also the trap that women and men fall into when they are involved in a controlling relationship and to what degree we stay in that relationship in the name of "love" ... or even to just "be right" about someone...even when we are dead wrong. It doesn't matter whether staying in a relationship-gone-wrong makes "sense" sometimes...it is the difficult process of recognition and then disconnecting from the dream of a perfect life,making difficult decisions, closing the door and moving on...and in the process HEALING.
(reviewed 2 days after purchase)
Review by: Suzanne Barrett on Aug. 6, 2011 : (no rating)
In 1964, a young Midwestern senior nursing student fell in love with a good-looking young man. Never mind that her strict Catholic parents didn’t like him, he made Emalou feel that she was a special person. Despite Emalou’s parents misgivings, she and Ray continued to date during her final school year, and he asked her to marry him. Despite some minor incidents that gave her pause and the knowledge that he’d gotten another girl pregnant, she accepted and he went off for basic training in Biloxi, Mississippi. A series of mishaps prevented her from completing her tests to get her RN, but she was determined that Ray was the one. They married in August 1965 and relocated to Utah, setting up housekeeping near the air base to which Ray was assigned. A daughter, Tori was born. Eventually, they were stationed near Frankfurt, Germany, and they remained here until Ray left the service.

This is not a story of young love, a happy marriage or life in the sixties and seventies. Rather it is one of a young woman’s devotion to family and her vows, and to keeping the family together even in the face of problems that would have made many women run as far away as they could. Not Emalou. Her faith and her vows instilled a determination within her to make things right, despite the signs that the carefree man she married was not the man she now shared a home with. Ray was manipulative and, at times, overbearing, and drink became his nightly companion. Despite the increasing signs, Emalou chose not to see or believe them. Whenever Ray turned on the charm, it was yesterday all over again, and Emalou lived for her yesterdays instead of her tomorrows.

They returned to the States and set up a household close to her parents. Ray opened an antiques store and Emalou was goaded by a kindly doctor into finishing her exams so she could become a registered nurse. She did so, and her salary made it possible to buy a home. But working nights created an environment fraught with problems that led to dire consequences.

Under My Roof was a difficult read, not because it isn’t competently written. It is, but the subject is distasteful and difficult for me. Additionally, I failed to see Ray’s attraction for Emalou or anyone. While this may stem from the fact that the scenes have been recreated by a woman who lived through the shame and horror, and is now looking back, it certainly colored her vision of her then husband and life. I found Ray so unappealing that I could not fathom how anyone could be interested in him. I looked for a shred of human kindness and found very little. That made me wonder why Emalou stayed with him, even before the major problem of incest. What I learned from this compelling story, however, is that the crime of incest can happen anywhere, even in small-town flyover country. And in Ms. King’s words: "When a mother knows something is amiss. . .there is something amiss; and, when a mother thinks something is wrong. . .something is wrong." It’s a difficult read but the author’s courage in telling her story just may save others from this tragic abuse.
(reviewed 21 days after purchase)
Review by: Emalou King on July 12, 2011 :
The significance of this work is to bring awareness of child sexual abuse which could be happening next door, down the street, up the block or right under your roof. More often than not the mother is blamed when there is father/daughter incest. This book shows how the perpetrator
is not only controlling but very sick. Hear the voice of a mother who lived through it and dared to tell.
(reviewed 22 days after purchase)
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