I Should Have Known Cheddar

Rated 5.00/5 based on 4 reviews
Detective Frank Bureau returns as he teams with Akkadia to solve a baffling string of robberies committed by a mad inventor and his killer robot. More
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About James Hold

"First you're an unknown, then you write one book and you move up to obscurity." — Martin Meyers

I published my first book in 2004. It became an immediate collector's item. I know this for a fact as I have several hundred copies collecting dust in my attic. Critics everywhere said it belonged right up there between Ernest Hemingway and Robert E Howard—on an alphabetical bookshelf.

My influences include Rocky & Bullwinkle, 1950s sci-fi movies, and silver-age comics.

I live in Texas with my Princess wife, and cats Rocky and Dusty. You can contact me at jamesroyhold@gmail.com.

About the Series: Secrets of Akkadia
Akkadia, super-hot cutie and master of mystical arts, battles evil in all its many forms

Also in Series: Secrets of Akkadia

Also by This Author

Reviews

Review by: Andre' Mwansa on July 22, 2018 :
"Not now, thanks. I got paid yesterday and spent it on a pack of gum. You say the thief left the toasters. That could mean he already has one — in which case we should check out anybody who's opened an account in the past six months — or else there's no electricity where he lives. Of course, there's always the possibility of this being an inside job."

Brilliant, with a bit of G.K. Chesterton quoting. My favorite scene was the one between Frank and Akkadia. Although that was a bit R-rated, it was lol funny.

Mr. Hold has some pretty awesome imagination I wish I had.

Great story.
(review of free book)
Review by: Michelle B on June 23, 2018 :
Pia Zadora teams with Leslie Neilsen to battle Nikola Tesla in a Super Chicken / Police Squad parody...

Ziggurat, Akkadia's faithful assistant, looked out the tower window in response to a knock at their door.
"There's a man downstairs with a head of cheese."
"The poor thing," the Compassionate Conjurer commiserated. "He should see a doctor."

There's aslo a recurring gag on the subject of GK Chesterton....

"Wait!" Akkadia interrupted. "Seals and Crofts. Summer Cheese. I knew there had to be one."
"One what?"
"GK Chesterton. A poem or song on the subject of cheese. It's been bugging me ever since Zig mentioned it."
"You mean as in: 'I think that I shall never see A poem lovely as a cheese'?"

Silly bank names, a flying brooms, officers grabbing a Danish, magic utterences...

"as it is written in the Sacred Scroll of Yor-Samoht"
"By the Orphic Orbs of Oktid"

And the usual WOWZA! moments we've come to expect from our wardrobe malfunctioning heroine. Too much here to be covered in a short review and you'll probably have to read it several times to catch everything. But re-reading only makes it better. Check it out, please. If you don't laugh out loud at this then there is something seriously wrong with you.
(review of free book)
Review by: Bobb B on June 22, 2018 :
You have outdone yourself with an abundance of (forgive mine) "cheesy" puns.
Between Akkadia and Yegua (with a dash of the wrestling stories tossed in) you will soon own every 5 star there is.
(review of free book)
Review by: lafuente03 on June 22, 2018 :
kataw-anan.
(review of free book)
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