on Feb. 8, 2012 :
This is the 4th in a series of installments from the author. In this one Raven is not referring to her hair as tresses as it is not written in first person. As far as how the author chose to describe things, I rather like it instead of the plain "she didn't do it because it was about to rain". I happen to know what "Eventuate" means; the times I come across a word I do not know its definition I use a dictionary. It is understandable if this genre is not to your liking, but do not bash an author because you cannot understand the way the story is laid out or know the definitions of the words.
So far I have to say this series is intriguing. The world and cyber world setting are very original. The way each installment connects to the previous one is well written. I am looking forward to finishing what installments are left as well as any others that will come after.
(review of free book)
on Oct. 14, 2011 :
I wish Ash Stirling had read what she wrote before she published it here on Smashwords. Here is her opening sentence, "Raven twitched forward the hood of her jacket, pulling it over her red tresses so that her face was lost in the shadows. All that could be seen were only a pair of green eyes that glowed with a faint inner light. It wasn't for reasons of weather that’s she did so. Despite it being dull and dreary, grey and gloomy, the rain that had threatened all day had yet to eventuate."
When was the last time any woman referred to her own hair as her tresses? When was the last time any of us used the phrase, "It wasn't for reasons of weather that I wore a raincoat? And what is this nonsense about it being dull and dreary and grey and gloomy that is going to make the rain eventuate? Eventuate? What's that all about. Ash, write words that people use—read your writing aloud! Ask yourself is this the way people speak?