by Kennie Kayoz
Last bunch of days I've been really sad.
Down and depressed no reason to lift my head.
Roaming down the street.
Starring at my feet.
As they shuffle me down the path of life.
Never an easy path.
Would my life have been better if I put down the pen.
To never have wrote any of my feelings.
Or would I have been dead.
Laying on the ground from bleeding.
Does writing really give me any sort of outlook on life.
It doesn't make life any easier.
I'm still broke, still stuck in same position.
When others are around I pretend to be normal.
Try not to show the depression inside.
Recently went to a wedding.
Tried not to show my depression but it fought its way to my surface.
The smile went thin and the corners of my mouth weighed down.
- Kennie -
I use to beable to hide my depression.
Now it seems that I'm laying on my bed more.
Doing nothing but watching TV.
Not having the strength to get up.
Not having the strength to do anything.
Starring blankly at the tv.
As I watch repeats of “My Name Is Earl”
Wishing the show didn't go off the air.
But I continue to lay here.
The show has nothing to do with me being depressed.
I feel like I can't do anything right as is.
Constantly told I should be doing better.
Always being put down.
Always getting passed by.
“Don't call us, we'll call you”
The motto used by many.
Whenever they see the name Kennie.
I would like to wish that something better is along my way.
But sadly I doubt it.
I could stand on top of the highest hill and shout it.
But nobody would hear it.
They only hear what they want too.
- Kennie -