As a writer of erotica, I have met quite a few extraordinary individuals who have some astonishing and occasionally bizarre fantasies. But I do not think any fantasy I have been asked to draft is as unusual as this one. It is from Maria, a young, single Filipina who lives in San Francisco. This young woman has managed to cross an awareness of the ordeal of crucifixion with an attraction for BDSM. The result: a fantasy where she is crucified, with all the trimmings.
Now crucifixion was an extreme form of punishment when it first appeared in Rome. Landowners used it to discipline runaway slaves. Maria had come to the conclusion that unspeakable things happened before crucifixion: you were stripped naked, then sexually humiliated and molested before you were flogged and crucified.
Maria told me I needed to read between the lines of the Catholic retelling of the biblical record. She saw crucifixion as a completely sexualized torture ritual. She said, “They crucified women too. I’ll bet the women were sexually abused and raped before they were whipped.” According to the historical record victims, slaves and criminals were crucified totally naked.
The “sedile” was used to impale the condemned (anus for the men and vagina or anus for the women) and the legs could be bound in a wide-open position. Flagellation and rape (for both woman and men) were common before crucifixion. So, if Maria was right, crucifixion was a complete torture ritual that initially involved sexual humiliation and forcible sex.
What may have begun as interrogation turned into a ritual of dominance, molestation and penetration. And that, Maria concluded was backbone of modern BDSM. She had seen a crucifixion reenactment in the Philippines as part of the Easter religious celebrations and it apparently impressed her tremendously. She told me men and women were actually crucified.
Maria’s online enchantment with BDSM porn had whetted her appetite for her own personal fantasy where she would be victimized and tortured in the Roman fashion. And, along the way, she discovered my writing. So, she wrote me and shyly asked me to fashion a crucifixion fantasy for her. When I asked if it were to take place in a contemporary setting, she said, ‘no’. She wanted me to portray her as a slave in the Roman era.