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Fighting for your relationship

I’ve seen it more than I care to think of. Especially lately.

People are together, and then they are not.

Maybe I’m naive. Maybe I’m a romantic. But when I said “till death do us part”, I meant it.

I’m not talking about our wedding. That’s merely a ceremony. An event. A celebration. A party.

I told the woman I love that I would always be there for her. Period. The rings make it public. The wedding dress and tuxedo made it fancy and formal. But what made it official was the fact that I said it, I promised it, and I meant it.

Maybe the problem with marriage today isn’t too many divorces. Maybe there are too many marriages. Too many promises. Too many commitments. It’s not that people take the marriage too lightly - it’s that they take the commitment too lightly. Forever is a long time. If you are not sure about forever, don’t say forever. If you are having second thoughts before a wedding, maybe you should just run away. A commitment is something you are sure of. If you are not sure, you are not committed. You are just taking a test drive.

In the end, it’s really just a matter of priorities. Ask yourself: What is most important to you? If your marriage isn’t right there at the top, you are doing something wrong. If your first thought is “career”, your life is out of whack. If you think “money”, you are destined to be sad for forever. If you think “my children”, well…you’re a parent.

Careers will come and go. Money will come and go. They should be the background, the accents, the accessories of your life, not the driving force behind it.

This is another obvious failing of the education system. You can get a full-fledged “classical education.” You can waste years of your life learning how to analyze stories written hundreds of years ago. But you will not be given a single day of instruction about the true useful realities of life. These misconceptions aren’t a new concept, either. It’s old news:

  • Men get married expecting their wives to never change.

  • Women get married expecting to change their husbands into what they want.

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