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Interview with Noah Pasternak

Published 2016-07-07.
What inspires you to get out of bed each day?
There's a homeless man who lives under it that kicks my face until I get up.
What do your fans mean to you?
I love my fans more than anything else.
Whenever my house is too warm and I don't want to raise my bill by turning on air conditioning, I find that my fans are an easy way to solve the problem with their osculating coolness.
Do you remember the first story you ever wrote?
I gave that bum Shakespeare the idea for "Hamlet" and anyone who tells you otherwise is a dirty liar.
Do you remember the first story you ever read, and the impact it had on you?
Yes, the first story I ever read has been burned into my memory for years upon years.
I remember the intensity, the fear, the wondering if everything would be okay not just in the book, but in real life as well.
And it really shook me up when Grover found out that he was really the monster at the end of the book. Powerful stuff.
When did you first start writing?
The answer to this question? I started writing that a few seconds ago.
What is your e-reading device of choice?
My e-eyes.
Describe your desk
He's kind of a jerk when he doesn't get enough sleep, and I'm really hoping he'll move out to his own place soon.
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Books by This Author

Paul Blart Mall Cop 3: The Blartening by
Price: Free! Words: 4,760. Language: English. Published: July 7, 2016 . Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Parody
In the greatest unauthorized parody ever told, Paul Blart saves the world yet again!