Music inspires me to get out of bed each morning. Its been my friend, my therapist. my passion since I was a child. If people like what I have to offer as an entertainer, then that is great, be it good, bad, or indifferent, I will continue on with my music. Its taken me from some of the lowest places in life, and has put me in some of my highest.
When you're not writing, how do you spend your time?
Well I am not "yet" an author, but since I am a fulltime student in a doctoral program, that is all I do is write. but when I am not writing. I am playing piano and singing a great deal of the time. When I am not making music, I travel a great deal since I live bi-international, and I am dedicated and devoted to what little family I have left. I spend every day with my mom, I make it a point to see her at least a few hours a day. I have two children, and also four grandchildren, so when not helping my children, I am helping them by taking care of my grandchildren, whom I adore. What I do know, and I do not know much, but I do know that there are not enough hours in the day!
How do you discover the ebooks you read?
I discover them through my college website, I we have a similar application online that enables us access to most all books that are in publication.
Do you remember the first story you ever wrote?
The first story I ever wrote was when I was in my late 20's, and I was reflecting on being put into a prison type situation when I was only 8 yrs old. I called it Kalifornia Dreaming, and if you knew me, you'd understand why.
Do you remember the first story you ever read, and the impact it had on you?
The first story I ever read was a book by Jaqueline Suzanne called "Valley of the dolls." To date that is still one of my favorite books, I think because I could relate so much to the main character.
What do you read for pleasure?
For pleasure I read anything to do with the Entertainment industry. I also love a good horror themed book as well.
What is your e-reading device of choice?
I use my desk-top computer.
Describe your desk
My desk is very organized, with very little on it. I hate clutter, and refuse to have my home, desk, car, etc. filled with clutter. I am a person who needs to know where everything is at.
Where did you grow up, and how did this influence your writing?
I was born in Italy, but my grandmother brought the family here when I was a child, and spent the majority of time growing up in New York. I do not think where I lived had any influence on my writing, especially since when I write, its never about NY or Milan.
What is the greatest joy of writing for you?
Being able to get lost in the words. I always write about my life, and everything i do write is never fiction. So when I am writing, it takes me back to that place and time. Just as music has, writing has been a theraputic resource to me.
What do your fans mean to you?
Well I wouldn't say I have any fans, since I am not famous. but when I get some i'll let you know!! LOL
What bad life situation inspires you in your writing?
I had endured a great deal of bullying when I was a child, not only did it strip me of any self-esteem I have, it drove me over the edge and I did the unthinkable. During third grade, from k - I had been in a private Catholic school, the kids were horrific to me, I was a fat child, and they let me know it on a daily basis. The ring leader of the group which was just about everyone in the class, was the ultimate little, pretty, petite, blonde, Barbie girl. She orchestrated on a daily basis all of the bullying from the other children and herself, her daily goal was to make my life a living hell. Typcially during any type of group gathering of the other students, I would linger behind, I learned early that if I did this, it would keep me from having confrontation with the children. During this fire drill, I was lagging as usual, and this girl I speak of, whose name was Libby, was standing at the top of a marble, 40 tread staircase, and as I peeked around the corner she just happened to spot me, and this was the beginning of the end for me, probably the day in my life I regret most, nonetheless, she made a mean remark to me, she said to me in her snide way, "you better hurry up fatty, before you get burnt if there really is a fire, OHHHHHH I forgot, your too fat, you won't burn. HA HA HA!" Though this comment was pale in comparison to the usual mean things that the others would say, or the beatings that the boys would put me through. for some reason at that moment I snapped, and all I knew was I wanted her dead. As she stood snickering at me, I charged at her like a bull. Before I could blink an eye, she was airborne, and the moment I seen her fly off the top of the staircase, all of the hate, disgust, etc. I had felt for her, all left me, and I felt horrible guilt, empathy, sadness for this pathetic little girl who obviously had much deeper issues than I ever had. I ran to her as she lay in a pool of blood and unconsious, and did all I could, but the fact of the matter was that it was already done. She was fine, but family court stepped in, and I was tried as a child, but nonetheless convicted and sentenced to five years in Auburn State of New York Penitentiary - Childrens division/ Cayuga Home. I was devastated, I remember the officers coming to take me away, I can remember my grandmother and mom crying hysterically, as I was. The memories are still all so vivid, I can remember be forced in the back seat, and I was crying I did not want to go, I can still smell the stale smoke, and the cheap vinyl seats just as if it was yesterday. To this day, whenever I hear the song "Seasons in the sun," I fall to pieces and break down, all of those times come rushing back to me when I hear it. Well if I thought that the bullying I had endured was bad in school? Well let me tell you, that was like being at an amusement part compared to this so called childrens division. I was in a prison, I had a cell. bars that locked me in nightly. I lived as an adult would in a setting where I was the youngest, and the others were up to age 17. I had to be up at 430 AM daily, and my job at 8 yrs old was to clean tile floors of all the bathrooms that were in the building I was living, there were three of them, I HAD NEVER EVEN CLEANED OFF A TABLE AT THIS POINT IN MY LIFE, I CAME FROM AN AFFLUENT, AMAZING, LOVING, SPOILING FAMILY. i know that this would never happen in this day and age, and should never have happened to me for defending myself, I was sentenced to five years. five years of getting a wooden paddle beaten on my ass if I did any of my chores wrong, which at first was often, and I learned really quick how to clean tile floors. LOL That was nothing compared to the 15, 16, and 17 yr old boys, raping me violently on a daily basis, or the beatings I recieved from them when they were not raping me. Just like school, most of the kids rallied together to make my stay miserable, and they succeeeded. Thank God my grandmother had some cash, and had an ingenious plan to get me out and it worked. She paid her oncologist x amount of dollars to write the 'warden', which they used a sweet, everything is hunky dorey term when referring to him, he was the "uncle." That was a laugh, but it worked, I ended up serving only 1 1/2 yrs. It was like getting a free pass to heaven when I exited those doors. So this was the worst time in my life, and this year and a half defined me as a person in my later yrs. it made me tough as nails.and also scared the hell out of me to be the sweetest, most honest, person you'll ever meet. I'M DEATHLY AFRAID OF JAIL. lol The worse part of this all was that when I left the facility, I had to blame someone, so I focused all of this hate, and blame on my mom who is one of the most amazing mothers in the world, and the kindest sweetest person you'd ever meet. but from 9 to 11 I was the child from hell to her, and became the mean kid in school. Guess where i ended up? I ended up in foster care at 11yrs old..STUPID?
What is something that you have been through in life that was an amazing time for you that also inspires you to write?
Even though I equated always to being a gay male when I was younger, I met this beautiful girl, her and I were best friends. both with the same dream of becoming famous singers. So at 16 yrs old, we left home and hitch-hiked from NY to Hollywood, California, in the middle of January and freezing cold. Stupid or what? Well it took us a month and a half, we did it by hitching rides with many different truckers, now remember this was back in the 1970s, and hitch-hiking was still legal. but we had to do things that we would of never dreamed of just to make it to Hollywood. Hence, why it took us a month and a half. LOL We arrived to Hollywood finally with 150 dollars to our names, no place to live, and each with a set of luggage. Well we thought we were going to arrive and instantly someone was going to discover us the moment we stepped onto Hollywood Blvd. Well it didnt happen, and stupidly from being so tired, stopped at the first hotel we saw, which was the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel, we decided we would get famous tomorrow, tonight we needed a bed, so for a mere 140 dollars we rented a room for the night which left us with sixty dollars, which was gone the next afternoon. Left penniless, we ended up stealing two shopping carts and put our total of 9 suitacases, two carry bags, and a huge makeup kit into them. We spent the next year and a half, sleeping on park benches, bus stop benches, etc. Where ever we could lye our heads, we would. We were forced daily to go to the YMCA & YWCA and spend a dime to shower, then we'd get all dressed up, walk, and end up at bus stops, where we mastered to perfection the art of panhandling. We would pretend as if we were short of change for the bus, and we'd wait until we could see it in the distance and start fumbling around in our pockets. then quickly, sounding urgent, and rushed, we'd ask people if they could spare some change because we were short bus money, and it worked, even more so for my gf. The men loved her, she would stop men dead in their tracks, and cause accidents in Hollywood because of how gorgeous she was. Well the pan handling didnt cut it, and we ended up doing so many foolish things. All the while we were trying to live, we were forgetting quickly about why we came to Hollywood in the first place. We were forced to start working the streets, I was actually pimping out my girlfriend, me of all people. here I was basically a girl, had no strength behind me, and I was pretending to be a big time NY pimp. just so we could live. but my gf quickly learned that if she could do this, so could I. So I was forced to join in, and hit Santa Monika Blvd as a male hustler. Then we started to meet people. this street walking went from exactly that to being escorts, doing porn, it was just all so surreal. We were chased by about 30 pimps one night, and my gf was forced as a ritual type pimp thing, for a lack of better words, LOL for her to choose a pimp. As I said she was beautiful, and was a hot commodity on the streets of L..A., what a nightmare, that left me thrown in the back of a van & threatened. After all this we were kidnapped for 2 weeks and kept at gunpoint in this apartment in the valley, until one evening I heard that they were going to take me out, shoot me in the back of the head, and dump me in the canyon, at that point we feared nothing, and ran for our lives. ironically, the hostess truck was about two blocks from this place and the man who drove it was taking a break, we jumped in and I offered to give him my girlfreind if he drove us quickly away, of course it worked, you know men, most are pigs. LOL We stayed in this amazing vacant hotel, complete with a potergeist, wild boars, I think thats what they were called. LOL Also as time went on we still were up to no good, but met the singer songwriter, Percy Sledge, he of course had a crush on my gf. but I didnt care, he was taking us to A&M signing parties, and all of these Holllywood events. We were partying on the weekends with Rick James and the Mary Jane girls. Living with a cast member of the 70s sitcom Happy days. but that did not come without a price, he wanted us to do porn for him and with him, we got paid, but its just the idea. LOL This all ended five years after it began, with me gettting tossed out into the street from our apartment, that I also was paying for, because my ex was involved with three entrepreneurs aka pimps, they beat the hell out of me, and I was left bleeded, broken wrist, etc. laying in the middle of Hillside drive where we lived, So I called my grandmother, she had me in a first class seat within hours back to NY. Meanwhile I sat at Bells also known as Snowwhites cafe, with the owner Doris, who was this Russian woman preaching to me about why I should go home and get away while I could still walk. LOL I did, and my gf was back after me one month to the day I left. Id never change a thing, all this defines who I am. I have not one regret.
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