My lust for living and my lust for pursuing pleasure--which includes keeping body and mind healthy, being creative, working out, acting, sex, gardening, biking, dancing, muscle, music and massage (giving and receiving). The sun and red wine should also be at the top of the list.
How do you discover the ebooks you read?
Actually I don't--I usually go to THE STRAND or order on-line. I like to hold books in my hand and touch them when I read them--like I prefer writing with a pencil and using an eraser to typing or real sex and touching to porn or cam sex.
What is your writing process?
I compartmentalize a lot. I'm so keen on being physical that much of the writing process for me is re-writing and getting my stuff out there--at least on-line--so that people start to become aware that I am more than a body and a pair of hands. Acting and pursuing acting can be so terribly grueling too because there is so damn much waiting. Waiting to perform, waiting to audition, waiting in a room full of 100 other guys who look exactly like you. I've pretty much resigned myself that my acting "career" is a lost cause but I so love to dress up and play characters and be seen that I just can't "not do it". Writing is a "resting-creative" activity. I hate/love what I write. It's not in any way, shape or form like anything that would be reviewed in the NY TIMES review of books; which I feel is basically an elitist club full of people writing fantasies for wealthy people who live terribly dull and boring lives but are too square to do anything but either make money or consume. My writing deals more with the underbelly of things, I guess because I've been though a lot and survived. When I reflect on some of my experiences now, they appear to be so dark as to be insanely funny. My dark man-cave is my studio. But my tower-in-the-sky (my deck under the sun), nourishes me with light. The outdoors is my chill pill. New York is quite mad, it's too fast, always about making a scene (indoors) and never stops. Here, there is a handful of stars who are working all the time (in acting) as there are a handful of art stars, who continually have shows, constantly sell, and receive grants. I am an unknown which provides a fabulous kind of freedom. Being a loner has worked against me though, in terms of not connecting with other writers. Recently I attended a release party of a magazine published by Kat Georges. The magazine dealt with the theme of "anti-technology". It was very inspiring. And I intend to connect with her because I relate to what she is doing. Technology has become the new non-creative, non-human norm. I met Kat and she is fun and not pretentious at all. I would love to make money from my writing so that I can afford to have all my joints replaced when I'm 70; and purchase muscle-bound nurses to tuck me in every night when I can no longer feed myself or walk, none of which will happen on Medicaid or Medicare. I pray for a big, happy ending before the incontinence comes. But who knows what fate has in store? I don't want fame but I would love for my art (acting and writing) to at least supply enough income to stay out of credit card debt. If not, who cares? There's no debtor's prison in America.
When you're not writing, how do you spend your time?
Doing massage, pursuing (and practicing) acting, gardening, dancing and watching horror movies (and others--major movie addict here).
Do you remember the first story you ever wrote?
I think before I started writing about my massage experiences, I wrote a story called "FLAMES". It was about my Father lighting himself on fire in the basement while cleaning a hot water heater. I was about 4 or 5. It was my first experience with real life horror and left a lasting impression on me. The adrenaline rush of being absolutely terrified, for me, is addictive. It's part of the reason I bike in the city and continue to practice massage and perform. These things make me feel ultra-alive. Of course I also love to meditate--on the sky, flowers, wave-lights, candles. Meditation is a wonderful sanctuary for an adrenaline junkie such as myself; it's a sort of recovery baseline and helps to make sobriety and life pain manageable.
Do you remember the first story you ever read, and the impact it had on you?
Probably the Dr. Suess books. They were all about fabulous and fluffy creatures drawing me into their effortless never-ending worlds. This was magic; then of course "The Wizard of Oz" and the sorrow and haunting of Edgar Allen Poe.
How do you approach cover design?
The cover for "Bisexual Love" was a digitally manipulated portrait of me done by a photographer to celebrate the year 2000. I just fell in love with the colors; and the rather mad expression was quintessentially "Coco Puff" the protagonist in my short story. I don't remember the photographer's name. I love getting photographed, clothed or nude, you name it. I also love taking photos of myself, erotic or otherwise. I love being intimate with the camera. The camera can be your lover, you know. It will never let you down, but also, having a camera for a lover is lots of work and can be, at times, rather cold. Rather cold, but always there, unlike men, who come and go...
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