Chauncey Roberts


Originally from Charleston, West Virginia,
Chauncey Roberts was educated at Hampden-Sydney College in Virginia, the University of Washington in Seattle, and in Freiburg, Germany. Injured with minor head injury at age 23, he abandoned a possible political career while suffering from “vagabondage” and moving continuously, including around the world while teaching business English and at universities while writing screenplays, articles, short stories and songs. Roberts was a participant in the Hungarian Revolution of 1989; his song Palestine, My Heart played on the radio in Tunisia before the Arab Spring. Before upheaval in Ukraine in 2013 he sang his "Judgment for the Bushes" at a Kiev festival. In 2013 he created a podcast series for Yappi Corporate in Kiev, The Saga of Lusty Louise, in which he impersonated all the male voices and two older female roles. His first video blogs are short historical films made in Germany, Building the Case for a War Crimes Tribunal Against Bush, His Cronies and Blair. His music videos include Impotent Again and There's a Child (tribute to Iraq War refugees). His newest song is "Boycott Israel: Don't Eat Their Bananas."

Smashwords Interview

What are others saying about your book?
The first person to read Scored of Scorpions: My Year of Hell in the Holy Land described the work as "beyond fascinating" and "very informative." But she was my first date at age 15 when riding on my handlebars as we went to see The Omen. Others have not been as kind...

"This is really one piece of unforgivable writing. The author doesn´t forgive Israel, Netanyahu, Bush and Blair. And yet he has failed to mention Kissinger!"
Associated Free Press

"What a bunch of liberal malarkey! In fact I suspect even the liberals will run like hell from Scared of Scorpions…"
Lush Limbaugh

"And what are these Jewish jokes about? Even though I personally belonged to an ant-Semitic country club years ago, doesn´t the writer realize only Jews are permitted to make jokes about Jews, just like only blacks can use the “N” word? I mean really, and all these dumb songs…"
Barbara Pierced-ear Bodybag

"If Chauncey Roberts is so opposed to illegal Jewish settlements in Palestine why doesn´t he just stay over there instead of blaming the U.S. Government and calling Americans unenlightened?"
National Christian Hypocrisy Report (NCHR)

"Israel kills nine people in the Gaza Flotilla Tragedy and Roberts´s dingdong concert is cancelled in Bethlehem´s Manger Square? What´s the big deal?"
Race to Kiss Israel´s Ass Congressional Caucus

"I stopped reading Scared of Scorpions when Roberts stated that he had wanted to be a starfucker. No star will fuck him and expect ever to work again in the business. Of course Israel told him not to come back!"
Military Defense Sycophant Org

"Just because Netanyahu believes he controls Washington doesn´t mean Israel is not our best friend in the Middle East. It´s a non sequitor, right?"
Zionist Savings Time

"In Scared of Scorpions: My Year of Hell in the Holy Land Chauncey Roberts suggests Muslims are buying more alcohol than Christians in Bethlehem shops. That smacks of self-determination! That´s not allowed!... All Palestinians must be painted as terrorists so everybody will keep their television syndication income into perpetuity."
Holy Gazette

‘’Beer is proof that God loves us“ would be no basis for sitting outside, guzzling away, where there are venomous scorpions. Surely, God also commands us to use our common sense! Upsetting Mohammedans, running personal risks…to what purpose?"
Benjamin Franklin

"Listen, those Arabs gave him an entire hospital wing and how does he return the favor? Scandal! Intemperance! Lust!"
Florence Nightingale

"Mon cher, there´s a difference between being a martyr for one´s cause and like with this Roberts only a delusional, paranoid traitor to his people…And his remarks about the French. Oh la la!"
Joan of Arc

"There can be little edification, no triumph of the spirit, in simply abandoning one sinking ship for another. Perhaps Mr. Roberts ought to have stayed in the Holy Land a second year."

"How can we develop state surveillance while still allowing heretics like this author of Scared of Scorpions out there shooting off their mouths? We know how Putin would handle the likes of him."
National Security Agency (NSA) intelligence officer

Gandhi: At least Scared of Scorpions opposes violence.
Lenin: Yes, but as I told Gorky a little violence is good at the beginning.
Gandhi: There´s already been far too much violence in the biblical city of Hebron.
Lenin: I don’t think adding beer-drinking Christians is a solution.
Martin Luther: Oh, I don’t know. Reform has to begin somewhere…
Who are your favorite authors?
I am under the influence of Edgar Cayce, Paramahansa Yogananda, Lillian Hellman, Truman Capote, Nathaniel Hawthorne, P.D. James, Margaret George, Elizabeth George, Iain Pears, Edward Rutherford, credit James Madison for his note-taking, and Noam Chomsky for independence of thought.
Read more of this interview.

Where to find Chauncey Roberts online


Scared of Scorpions: My Year of Hell in the Holy Land
Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 131,430. Language: Commonwealth English. Published: April 6, 2014. Categories: Nonfiction » Politics & Current Affairs » Biography, Nonfiction » Travel » By region
Songwriter Chauncey Roberts is robbed of his movie camera in Syria, beginning a hellish year in which his Palestine, My Heart Concert in Bethlehem is cancelled because of the Gaza Flotilla Tragedy, his TV sitcom nearly comes into being, and he begins Camp Evil in which Jewish settlers attack a scout camp. He overstays his Israeli visa by nine months, escaping at Tel Aviv's airport.

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