An Introduction to Author Ivana Hruba OR Utter Obscurity: Abridged
Ivana Hrubá is a lovely, lovely girl and a writer of some "notable" talent, the sum of which will, just for your entertainment, be very modestly noted here. Specializing in writing bold, quirky and outrageously entertaining fiction, Ivana is what we call an undiscovered gem, an exotic island waiting to be explored or, as some people say, a territory best left uncharted.
Ivana devised her first novel at the tender age of twelve when she was but a wee little girl wearing out her brother's hand-me-downs while chasing the geese off the village green in her native Czech Republic which was then under communist rule. Filled with poultry and very long sentences, Ivana's idyllic childhood came to an abrupt end in 1983 when she and her family crossed the Alps on foot to seek a new life free of communists and their blasted queues. After a year spent frolicking in a West German refugee camp, the family finally had a gutful of that sort of adventure, and, in 1984, they settled in Australia where they've been living it up ever since.
Forward twenty years. Following the publication of her debut thriller 'A Decent Ransom' Ivana developed the habit of talking about herself in the third person, a skill that comes in particularly handy when writing biographies. To this end, Ivana has also conquered her fear of appearing ridiculous due to excessive bragging as can be seen in this very intro right here. In the tradition of all gifted folk, working for a living has never appealed to our author; therefore, Ivana has largely given up on the idea, preferring to spend her time writing books.
In the wake of the tremendous success of her debut novel (18 copies sold in North America alone!) published by Kunati in 2008, Ivana has retreated from her adoring public to gain some much needed perspective on her life. These days Ivana can be found traipsing around her garden practicing the ancient art of Feng Shui which, in Ivana's case, consists of pouring manure on her flower beds and cutting shrubbery into interesting geometrical shapes. Yes, a regular Edward Sissorhands, Ivana's letting her creative juices flow in many a new and varied direction. Having successfully faded from public view, Ivana has been able to spread her creative wings and work as a freelance writer completely undetected, dabbling in corporate copywriting, theatre promotion, online blogging and wedding speeches. Finding these ventures a little more financially rewarding than her high-brow literary pursuits, Ivana has decided to seek out more of them so if you, dear reader, find yourself in need of a writer, give her a bell. She'll be delighted to get involved.
At the close of each day, Ivana likes to unwind in front of the computer, googling herself and drawing cartoons for her own amusement. To unwind from that pleasure, she takes her dogs, cats, mice, lice, ponies, chickens and goldfish for a walk down the beach. It's a good life for everyone involved and, for the most part, Ivana has enjoyed herself tremendously in it. However, certain unfortunate events, namely the untimely demise of her publisher Kunati Inc. in late 2009, left Ivana feeling rather flat; feeling like she had lost the key to the executive washroom. Yes, the Key to the Executive Washroom! Some of you who are fellow Published Authors will understand completely the scope of her devastation, for obtaining the Key to the Executive Washroom is the Mecca for all writers. It comes as no surprise then that having once obtained it, Ivana had every intention of holding onto it.
Not a day went by without Ivana mentioning to all and sundry that she was a Published Author with a Two Book Deal and that Sales of 'A Decent Ransom: A Story of a Kidnapping Gone Right' were Trending Upwards. On the days when Fan Mail arrived, there was no stopping her; armed with her trusty wine funnel, she trumpeted the news far and wide, catching unsuspecting passers-by at the bus stop, at the bakery, and on the school run. Yes, people, those were giddy times.
Ah well, all good things must come to an end. Her publisher's exit from the market economy did, for a moment or two, dampen Ivana's spirits but she eventually got over it and for a while was determined to get herself another key to the executive loo. She was foolishly hoping for a bigger, more established and dare we say more financially stable executive loo to offer her a key. So she fired off queries left, front and center, offering her wares. Perplexingly, nothing happened! Ivana realized that she was wasting her time. The door to the executive loo was firmly shut and staying that way. But! Every cloud has a silver lining! Ivana did get some lovely rejections during this process; beautiful, powerful sentiments wishing her luck elsewhere. Overcome with gratitude, Ivana has pasted them up into a keepsake album and is thinking of publishing them herself. (Stay tuned).
Ivana has recently split the atom (again) when she discovered ebook publishing on the net and proceeded to convert her entire body of work into ebooks in hopes of a tremendous public response. (Hint, hint, this is where you, the public, come in).
Meanwhile, if you find yourself with a spare 5, 6 hours and can't get hold of a Bollywood movie, why don't you just download Ivana's books, hey? It will only take a minute and you'll be glued (she writes good, you know). You will make her very happy. Cheers, Yours Truly
P. S. After agonizing, protracted reflection, Ivana has decided not to give her books away for free. You see, dear reader, it takes a lot of time, effort and hard work to write a novel, and there's really no good reason why this should be devalued. All Ivana's 'freebies' are either standalone short stories promoting a collection, or they are excerpts from her novels.
P.P.S. Should you decide to download Ivana's stories, your reviews posted online would be much appreciated. But please don't gripe about the books not having a conclusion; the point here is to convince you to buy the rest of the story, not to give the whole thing away. Other than that, say what you will. Hugs and kisses, Ivana
P.P.P.S. Ivana's a Goodreads author (Who isn't, hey?) and also has a blog where she gripes about the "advantages" of self-publishing and other similarly riveting stuff. Drop by, you'll be welcome. Love ya' all, cheers, I.
Where to find Ivana Hruba online
The Wedding at the Church of the Magnificent Phallus
The day has finally arrived. He proposed, she accepted and the wedding's about to begin in this satirical, politically incorrect tale in which lust, laziness, mistakes of the past and pent-up desires have a lot to do with the decision to get hitched.
It will destroy you.
A Decent Ransom: the Aftermath
A vulnerable young boy forced to guard a kidnapped woman forges an alliance with her with devastating consequences for some.
A Decent Ransom: the Aftermath concludes the story begun in A Decent Ransom: the Kidnapping.
A Decent Ransom: the Kidnapping
A Decent Ransom is a story of a kidnapping gone right. Essentially a tale of redemption, the contemporary, fast-paced thriller blends pathos with intrigue, drawing the reader into the private world of a vulnerable fifteen-year-old boy, who believes himself to be the keeper of a kidnapped woman. Against all odds, the two forge an alliance with dire consequences for some.
The Dead Husbands Club
Absolutely Fabulous meets Desperate Housewives in this spirited tale of two merry widows whose talent for discreetly solving other people’s problems earns them a devoted fan base and a prosperous living.
Reviews posted here and elsewhere online would be much appreciated. Cheers, xxoo Ivana
The Silly Adventures of Shloppy the Plop & Edmund the Cat, Book 1
Shloppy is a plop. Edmund is a cat. Shloppy and Edmund are best friends. Shloppy likes to sing and Edmund likes to eat. Shloppy and Edmund spend a lot of time together doing funny things. They go fishing. They climb trees. They jump over houses. Sometimes they go exploring in the forest. Best of all, they like to skate and learn new tricks, in this seriously cute cartoon series for kids.
Planet of Dreams: Go West
Shackled to a dangerous man, a young boy fights for survival in the desert.
Reviews posted here and elsewhere online would be much appreciated. Cheers, xxoo Ivana
The Silly Adventures of Shloppy the Plop & Edmund the Cat, Book 2
Shloppy is a plop. Edmund is a cat. Shloppy and Edmund are best friends. Shloppy likes to sing and Edmund likes to eat. Shloppy and Edmund spend a lot of time together doing funny things in this seriously cute cartoon series The Silly Adventures of Shloppy the Plop & Edmund the Cat.
Let's Read A Story
Very young children respond to simple narrative structure, colorful visual appeal and storylines that are suited to their limited understanding of the world around them. Let’s Read A Story will help your children understand simple concepts from everyday life while engaging them in a question & answer responses and acting out simple instructions.
Cabbage, Strudel and Trams (Part 3: Australia)
An almost autobiographical and definitely riotous tale of adolescence begun behind the Iron Curtain, continued in a West German refugee camp and coming to a glorious end in the land Down Under.
Ivana Hruba’s tag cloud
Smashwords book reviews by Ivana Hruba
- Hunting Elf, a doggone Christmas story
on Dec. 12, 2010
Hunting Elf, a doggone Christmas story by Dave Donelson is a delightfully amusing whodunit set in suburban New York. Prize-winning dogs, demented dog breeders and well-meaning dog owners slash would be detectives feature heavily in this humorous caper which centers around Elf, a purebred Silky Terrier puppy with seriously desirable lineage, a couple of crazy old bags who will stop at nothing to get him, and Dan, Elf’s hapless human, who just wants to be left in peace at Christmas time. But ‘tis NOT the season to be jolly when Elf runs away on an exploratory adventure around the suburb, leaving the hapless Dan and his posse of equally hapless friends to ‘hunt’ him down. The plot thickens with the arrival of Elf’s stalkers - two dog breeders with one thing in mind - to dognap Elf in order to breed prize-winning terriers for profit and glory. In show dog circles the ladies are well-known enemies, with a long history of rivalry between them, a point which goes unnoticed when bodies of dog-involved individuals begin to turn up after an encounter with Elf. Three murders later, Dan and his friends are on the case, busy chasing slippery dognappers who are busy chasing the even more slippery Elf who’s busy chasing anything that moves, leading everyone on a merry-go-round likely to end up badly for some and worse for others. But all good things must come to an end. The bad guys get their just deserts and Elf is returned safely home, just in time to celebrate Christmas.
Well-written and compelling, the story moves along at a steady pace, allowing the reader time to absorb the action (of which there is plenty) without feeling overwhelmed by it. Donelson’s comic timing is faultless; there are ‘laugh out loud’ passages throughout the story as well as many witty descriptions. Donelson does particularly well with his descriptions of Elf’s dog behavior, which he brings to life in vivid detail and with a good dose of humor. The tale is peppered with odd ball characters who add to the general sense of hilarity; Dan’s other-worldly brother-in-law Edgar and the seriously teenage pet shop attendant Moonrat among the most memorable. Hunting Elf is a funny and very enjoyable read. Thoroughly recommend it.