R Orion D


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Smashwords book reviews by R Orion D

  • Bitter Release on March 30, 2010

    It's tough giving a review on a short story without including any spoilers but I'll give it a shot. This may seem contradictory but too much is going on in this story yet there isn't enough to the story either. There. Done. More? Ok. Reading the story you feel that it was written to be seen on the screen or TV rather than read. Paragraphs are short and don't seem connected with each other. More like a shoot list on a storyboard. They tell you what the director want to capture but don't give you, the reader the details to give it a body, form, substance. A good example of this cut-scene aspect would be these two paragraphs (No spoiler here): "Thompson struggled to answer. He wanted to warn him...Finally all was black. When his eyes opened this time only the wet smells and drippings let him know..." A simple and would have hooked the two nicely. But on the screen I can see that there would have been a cut between the two. As a story it's a good one that could benefit a bit by more depth. More getting into the head of Will Thompson and his plight. It has a good ghost story ending that I can easily see myself sharing with friends late at night around a camp fire. I'd say more but then I'd be spoiling it for other.