Nathaniel Grundy


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Smashwords book reviews by Nathaniel Grundy

  • Project Zero: BulletProof on Feb. 22, 2010

    This is my first time writing a review, so be patient with me. I read your book, and overall, I enjoyed it. The characters were well-developed, if a bit archetypal; some characters seemed to only fill gaps (like the best friend) while others were more diverse and evolved in unexpected ways (like Rain, among others). The links that develop between the characters are interesting, and at times, comical. There were several times when the dialogue made me laugh out loud. The plot has a flow to it which, as an amateur writer myself, makes me envious; but even so, I have some problems with it. The major issue I have is the ending; From the time that Lance realized the identity of his nemesis, I felt that things were being rushed. The way that this revelation instantly hit Lance was, for me, unbelievable. Either him or his father should have been skeptical about the possibility of Haize being Haze; Things just fell into place too quickly after that. Another problem I have is that I feel some issues were not properly addressed; for instance, The whole triangle between Lance, Keri and Rain is never properly resolved. Also, some of the characters display no real change by the end of the book. While Lance and Rain's beliefs are visibly altered by the events that pass, other characters seem to fall out of the spotlight. Keri seems to develop an immense closeness to Lance, but sort of fades away towards the end. Ryan's relationship with Eva likewise builds up, but Lance's feelings about them are never firmly resolved. Finally, while Charles' loyalty to Lance seems to be communicated through action rather than words, it would still have been better if Lance had questioned Charles about Lance's suspicions regarding him. Charles displays affection to Lance by the end that is only justified by their mutual lust for revenge. Sorry to pick apart the characters so extensively, but as I said, this is my first review. (I doubt I'm even supposed to be writing in the first person right now, but what the heck.) In any case, I hope I've at least given the author some things to think about. Cheers, Redo19.