Scottie Futch


I am a former soldier, but current lover of pop-culture. I like anime, manga, comics, animation in general, and zombies. I always have to mention the zombies!

Anyway, I spent four years in the US army as an Advance Field Artillery Tactical Data System Specialist. This is a fancy way of saying, "Guy who coordinates the battlefield and makes coffee."

I am irreverent in nature. I tend to laugh at the strangest things, and usually those things are inappropriate to laugh at. This sort of fascination with the inane leads me to write comedy stories, and off-the-wall adventures.

Smashwords Interview

Where did you grow up, and how did this influence your writing?
I grew up in rural North Carolina. I find that it influences my writing in regards to what I think a man should be able to accomplish. I know how to do my own plumbing, electrical work, hunt, fish, and grow my own food.

I know what it is like to be looked down upon by 'intellectual superiors' who would probably die of exposure and starvation if they were lost in the woods. The fact that a man should be able to withstand all things that come at him, even if he wants to sit in a corner and cry, is a common theme in my works. It's ok to cry. A real man can cry. He just needs to fight through the tears and reload the shotgun while zombie grandma comes at him with a chainsaw.
What is your e-reading device of choice?
In all honesty, I prefer to simply read on my lap top. I know, that is not what most people mean when they ask about 'e-readers.' Still, I like the larger screen.
Read more of this interview.


Earth Tactics Advance
An ordinary day in the life of Scott Keen suddenly turns tactical as the laws of physics are rewritten to force the world to adhere to an apocalyptic change in the very nature of existence. Those who manage to survive the first day of the new world must survive in the wake of a new reality, life lived as a turn-based tactical role playing game
Galactic Fist of Legend
Humanity hangs on the edge of ruin as a race of alien beings appear one day and demand that the human race plays a survival game to determine their fate. Ten million people choose to become champions in the interdimensional death game, but are things as they appear?
Origin A.R.S.
Origin A.R.S. is a novel series involving the exploration of a world that operates on rules similar to an old school RPG. Scott Jacobs, a former soldier, has been abandoned by his fiance in favor of her old boyfriend. Heartbroken, he turns to gaming online. Given the chance to play a new game, he accepts the offer and finds out that not only is the game world real, but he discovers the one thing that he needed most. Scott Jacobs finds a new purpose.
Origin A.R.S
Price: $2.99 USD.
Origin ARS
Price: $2.99 USD.
Origin ARS 3
Price: $2.99 USD.
Origin ARS 4
Price: $2.99 USD.
Origin ARS 5
Price: $2.99 USD.
Origin ARS 6
Price: $2.99 USD.
Galataea Crystallim Core
A series of erotic comedy science fantasy books designed to tickle your funny bone, and elevate your mood. In a world were crystalline beings take the form of cute monstergirls who only want someone to love them, can one man rise to the occasion and make them feel truly alive?


Galataea Crystallim Episode 10: The Little Death
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 18,620. Language: English. Published: February 18, 2019. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor, Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
The world of Galataea is a strange and unusual place filled with many strange creatures and even stranger people. Scott continues to make headway with the Crystallim in his care, while a looming threat appears. The not so-surprising return of a certain individual leads to many revelations and perhaps, an increase in team morale.
Blackthorne: A Beautiful Nightmare
Price: $5.99 USD. Words: 184,370. Language: English. Published: December 14, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Epic, Fiction » Fantasy » Dark
Scott Logan spends his days pretending to be a joyful person to mask his soul-crushing loneliness. Intimate human relations seem an impossibility to him, until one day the inexplicable happens. The entire world fell asleep at the same time. The Earth was set to be upgraded by those who supposedly ruled over it, and from that moment on The Dream was born. An otherworld RPG reality.
Galataea Crystallim Episode 9 - Super Effective!!
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 16,710. Language: English. Published: December 8, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » Parody, Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
The battle for love and glory continues on the next exciting episode of Galataea Crystallim! Scott and his team patrol the wilds outside of Mesa-II and face an ever-increasing number of nightmares. A certain tragedy loving spider girl happily gets more than she bargained for with her master, while a certain lonely little mermaid finds that liquid courage isn't always enough!
Galataea Crystallim Core - Episode 8: Back in Service
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 16,730. Language: English. Published: October 26, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Urban, Fiction » Science fiction » Short stories
Return to the world of Galataea where beautiful dreams and nightmares walk in the flesh. In this exciting episode, Scott learns an incredible secret. New friends are made, and old friends are called back into the fray.
Earth Tactics Advance Volume 2
Series: Earth Tactics Advance. Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 81,390. Language: English. Published: July 10, 2018. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Urban, Fiction » Science fiction » Apocalyptic
Life, love, quirky musical numbers, there has never been an apocalypse quite like this one. Return to the world of Earth Tactics Advance. Beset by the rules of a turn-based tactical survival horror dating sim, witness the efforts of the hot new rising faction 'Team Badass' as they try to find their place in the new reality.
Galactic Fist of Legend: Volume 3
Series: Galactic Fist of Legend. Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 107,850. Language: English. Published: December 22, 2017. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » Apocalyptic, Fiction » Fantasy » Urban
The legendary fisting journey of Scott and his team continues in this next exciting installment of Galactic Fist of Legend. During their first team building exercise mission the team stumble across a dire situation involving a familiar tunic-clad hero. Can Scott lead his team to victory in the most dangerous mission he's ever faced? Will they fail and doom entire world? Stay tuned and find out!
Origin ARS 7
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 7. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 50,940. Language: English. Published: October 11, 2017. Categories: Fiction » Romance » Fantasy, Fiction » Fantasy » Urban
The origin crew is back for another adventurous installment in the land of ARS. Between the retaking of Trinity Station, the difficulties of managing a relationship between three people, and the ever encroaching threat of world destruction from the board, can this newly minted family survive?
Earth Tactics Advance
Series: Earth Tactics Advance. Price: $3.99 USD. Words: 104,620. Language: English. Published: April 29, 2017. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Urban, Fiction » Science fiction » Apocalyptic
(5.00 from 2 reviews)
An ordinary day in the life of Scott Keen suddenly turns tactical as the laws of physics are rewritten to force the world to adhere to an apocalyptic change in the very nature of existence. Those who manage to survive the first day of the new world must survive in the wake of a new reality, life lived as a turn-based tactical role playing game.
Galactic Fist of Legend: Volume 2
Series: Galactic Fist of Legend. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 68,830. Language: English. Published: March 28, 2017. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Dark, Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
Welcome back to the madness that is Galactic Fist of Legend! In this latest installment of the Galactic Fist of Legend LitRPG series, Scott Davidson must contend with all manner of ridiculous shenanigans while dealing with the horrors of the underworld, fruit baskets, and the most disturbing sock puppet in history. Death awaits around every corner, and perhaps even fates worse than death...
Galataea Crystallim Core: Collection 2
Series: Galataea Crystallim Core, Collection 2. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 52,960. Language: English. Published: February 19, 2017. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Comedy/Humor, Fiction » Science fiction » General
Welcome back to the mildly erotic continuing saga that is Galataea Crystallim. Scott and the girls have returned for another series of adventures that include dungeon diving, epic cuddles, random snuggles, lewd proposals, ridiculous encounters, cake defense, and girl fights. Monstergirl snuggle action has never been so snuggly.
Galactic Fist of Legend
Series: Galactic Fist of Legend. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 80,990. Language: English. Published: November 8, 2016. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » General, Fiction » Science fiction » Apocalyptic
In the year 2018 a bright star appeared near Earth. Humanity as a whole was briefly introduced to a race of beings far beyond their understanding. During that brief interaction a proclamation was made, Defeat the Grand Emissary or become the eternal slaves of those who had arrived at Earth. Also, it's a comedic parody. Pretty obvious, right?
Galataea Crystall Core: Collection 1
Series: Galataea Crystallim Core, Collection 1. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 66,250. Language: English. Published: September 15, 2016. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Sci-Fi Erotica, Fiction » Science fiction » General
(4.00 from 1 review)
In the distant future, humanity has spread outward to the stars through the usage of cryogenic suspension and light speed capable ships. One group of humanity, formed from various different ancient Earth nations, settled on a planet that would become known as Galataea. Upon doing so, they have come to know a sexy new reality. Monster girls! High-Technology! Sexy happenings! Go!
Origin ARS 6
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 6. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 67,490. Language: English. Published: May 12, 2016. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Epic, Fiction » Romance » Fantasy
Return once more to the world of ARS, a place where metal monsters walk the land in the form of mobile scrap heaps. In this exciting installment, Scott and the group learn that they must separate for a time. In the interim, new friends are made, quests are to be quested, and a new danger begins to loom on the horizon as a full moon rises to prominence. All this and more... Inside!
Freelance Saga Episode 6
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume II, Episode VI. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 13,440. Language: English. Published: January 4, 2016. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Action/Adventure, Fiction » Fantasy » General
The world of Alterra is a place of mystery, of wonder, of beautiful monster girls who get what they want. In Episode 6, Scott and his crew develop their relationships further, and have to deal with the realities of travel in the fantasy world at large. Episode 6 begins to first major story arc, the road to Darcheilme.
Origin ARS 5
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 5. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 58,790. Language: English. Published: December 7, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Urban, Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
(4.00 from 1 review)
The world of ARS, a land built and maintained by a divine corporation, returns in an all new and more dynamic manner. Join Scott once more as he comes to grip with a far more dangerous reality in the classic server. Hilarity and drama ensue as he explores a whole new, yet familiar world.
Origin ARS 4
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 4. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 69,590. Language: English. Published: September 26, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » General, Fiction » Romance » Sci-fi
Welcome back to the world of ARS! In this moderately exciting volume the final adventures in the casual server are revealed. There are laughs, tears, epic reveals, and more. Follow Scott Jacobs and crew throughout their adventures in Eizen as they seek to learn more about themselves, their love for each other, and possibly help those mermaids who were captured a while back.
Origin ARS 3
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 3. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 79,660. Language: English. Published: May 26, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » General, Fiction » Romance » Fantasy
The Origin crew are back in an all new adventure! On the way to the island kingdom of Eizen the intrepid trio run across a mermaid in grave danger. Caught up in an undersea adventure, they must unlock new abilities, and fight interesting new foes. Secrets are shared, emotions run high, and a great truth about both Scott and his purpose on ARS is revealed.
Freelance Saga Episode 5
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume II, Episode V. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 14,670. Language: English. Published: April 22, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Sci-Fi Erotica, Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
Episode 5 of Freelance Saga begins the journey to bring Scott back to his original mindset. No longer beset by obstacles and beta testing issues, he must rise to the occasion and learn the ins and outs of keeping his harem of hot, and overly amorous, monster girls happy. Love, battle, and hardcore sex abound in this episode.
Origin ARS
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume 2. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 73,960. Language: English. Published: March 14, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Epic, Fiction » Science fiction » Adventure
(4.00 from 1 review)
Welcome back to the world of ARS, a land where rats dance to the music, a place where someone who has been burned by love can find a second chance. This is the second volume in the adventures of Scott and Rhea. New characters are introduced, and lots of action and humor are present.
Freelance Saga: Episodes 1 - 4
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume I Full-Collection. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 69,070. Language: English. Published: March 1, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » General, Fiction » Erotica » Sci-Fi Erotica
Herein are contained the first four episodes of the Freelance Saga Series. They chronicle the origin of Scott Hunter and show his journey through what amounts to an expanded tutorial in a perverted reality designed like a real-life virtual reality role playing game. Sexy monster girls, murderous rabbits, and burning biscuits abound!
Freelance Saga Episode 4: Beta Shift
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume I, Episode IV. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 22,110. Language: English. Published: March 1, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories, Fiction » Erotica » Sci-Fi Erotica
In episode 4 of Freelance Saga Scott Hunter learns the reason for his troubles during the Quantum Interference arc! He further discovers that the world of Alterra has undergone a major system update in anticipation of an upcoming end to the beta test. The world will go live in a few short months and people from Earth will be visit in large numbers! Can he possibly become the Dark Lord of Alterra?
Origin A.R.S
Series: Origin A.R.S., Volume I. Price: $2.99 USD. Words: 53,600. Language: English. Published: February 4, 2015. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Epic, Fiction » Romance » Fantasy
Origin A.R.S. is the story of the former soldier Scott Jacobs. Mentally and emotionally exhausted by a lifetime of people simply changing their minds in regards to how much they care about him, he accepts an offer to play a game. However, that game turns out to be a true existence that operates like an old school RPG. Strange monsters and quirky characters await. Come, witness the spectacle...
Freelance Saga: Slow Grind
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume I, Episode III. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 17,770. Language: English. Published: August 8, 2014. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories, Fiction » Erotica » Action/Adventure
In this episode Scott Hunter learns more about the world, develops a new friendship, and learns that it is better to have no biscuit than to have his biscuits burnt! Combat, murder bunnies, romance, naughty sex, fresh milk, and burning biscuits... they await you inside gentle readers!
Freelance Saga: Quantum Interference
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume I, Episode II. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 15,640. Language: English. Published: July 24, 2014. Categories: Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories, Fiction » Adventure » Action
Hunted, alone, and unable to return home... Will Scott Hunter survive the wilderness? Will he find a way to log-out before this hardcore RPG survival experience becomes too much for him? Freelance Saga: Quantum Interference is the second episode in a new series about life, love, and hardcore gaming.
Freelance Saga: Learning Curves
Series: Freelance Saga, Volume I, Episode I. Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 14,580. Language: English. Published: July 14, 2014. Categories: Fiction » Erotica » Action/Adventure, Fiction » Fantasy » Short stories
(4.00 from 3 reviews)
What would you do if you were given the chance to do something extraordinary? What if a world existed where life was a game? You could gain levels, fight monsters, get into sexy situations, and become a truly powerful person. Would you take up the call to explore this brave new frontier, or give up on the adventure of a lifetime? Scott Hunter made his choice, and life is about to get sexy.

Scottie Futch's tag cloud

adult    adventure    alraune    alternate reality    anime    anime inspired    apocalypse    battle harem    bunny girl    busty    centaur    centaur girl    comedy    dark souls    death game    dragon    elf    elf and human    erotic fiction    erotic monster harem    fairy    fantasy    fantasy game    fantasy game world    fantasy harem    fantasy rpg    fantasy world    game    game fantasy world    game fiction    game life    game novel    game novelization    game novels    game parody    game world    gamelit    gamelit harem    gamer    goddess    harem    harem erotica    harem fantasy    litrpg    litrpg erotica    litrpg fantasy    litrpg harem    litrpg series    martial arts    mermaid    milking breasts    minotaur    mmorpg    modern fantasy    monster girl    monster girl harem    monster girls    monstergirl    monstergirl harem    origin ars    parallel world    parody    parody fantasy    pokemon parody    portal fiction    postapocalyptic actionadventure    postapocalyptic apocalypse apocalyptic fiction end of the world survival survivalist adventure teotwawki doomsday preparedness survivalist fantasy shtf armageddon collapse    role playing    role playing fiction    roleplaying erotica    romance    romantic comedy    rpg    rpg action adventure    rpg adventure    rpg erotica    rpg fantasy    rpg fantasy world    rpg fiction    rpg novel    rpg world    rpglit    sci fantasy    sci fantasy books    science fiction    sciencefantasy    sciencefiction comedy    scifi    scifi adventure    scifi harem    scifi litrpg    scifi monstergirl    sexy pokemon    slime girl    sorcerer    sorcery    survival horror    sword and sorcery    videogame    videogame world    virtual reality    virtual reality fiction    virtual reality game    vrmmo    vrmmorpg    zombie    zombie apocalypse