Benjamin Samizdat


Benjamin Samizdat started out from humble beginnings. After losing his first job as Analyst-Therapist, or Analrapist, he struggled to find work until landing an unexpected position as a weekend fill-in for Captain Underpants. This was where Ben realized he wanted to work in the Hero Industry, despite the typically low-pay and poor benefit packages. He soon began landing gigs filling-in for Hero’s who were going on vacation such as Sentinel of Seal Bay, Champion of Chesterfield, Protector of Pretoria, Hero of Halifax and Avenger of Aberdeen.

With his resume filling out nicely, Ben applied for the position of Marquess of Reading before realizing the job had absolutely nothing to do with literacy, or even Heroism for that matter. Putting this setback behind him, Ben soldiered on and soon became the epitome of upward mobility, obtaining ever-more prestigious positions such as the Event-planner for the Chief Evil-Fighter of Earth, Assistant-Secretary to the Supreme Savior of the Solar System, Groundskeeper for the Guardian of the Galaxy, Urban-Planner for the Ultimate Defender of the Universe, Tea-Taster for the Council of Time-lord’s and Career-planner for the Commander of the Cosmos.

After numerous interviews, Ben almost landed the coveted job as Ancillary Jr. Chief Executive Officer in Charge of Everything, but the position was downsized and instead he became the Benefits-manager for the Best There Is, the Best There Was and the Best There Ever Will Be. Ben has now retired to write his memoirs and can often be found sipping a stiff drink at the Optimist Club reminiscing about his Hero-Career so that the little people may live vicariously through his mighty exploits.

Contact Ben at:

Smashwords Interview

If you could get rid of one State in the U.S., which would it be and why?
I'd get rid of one of the Dakotas. Do we really need two Dakotas?
If someone were to write a biography about you, what do you think the title should be?
The Ordinary Life of an Extraordinary Man.
Read more of this interview.


This member has not published any books.