David Bruce

Biography

David Bruce is an anecdote columnist at "The Athens News" in Athens, Ohio.

Where to find David Bruce online


Where to buy in print


Books

Create, Then Take a Break: 250 Miscellaneous Anecdotes and Stories
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 27,640. Language: English. Published: November 12, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes about various creative activities. A sample: Corey Ford’s writings were widely plagiarized—especially his short humorous piece “How to Guess Your Age.” Whenever this happened, Mr. Ford would sue, winning every case. He once said about his lawsuits, “I find this a much easier way to make a living than by writing.”
The Kindest People: Be Excellent to Each Other (Volume 1)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Be Excellent to Each Other, Book 1. Price: Free! Words: 71,780. Language: English. Published: October 7, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
(5.00 from 1 review)
This book contains 250 stories about good deeds, including this one: Some children are incredibly nice. A boy named Jacob made his mother a glass of strawberry-flavored milk. He left it in the refrigerator along with this note: “Dear Mom, This is for you, I understand how hard you work, and I know you love strawberry milk so, I made this for you. :) Jacob.”
Dante's "Divine Comedy": A Retelling in Prose
By David Bruce
Price: $3.00 USD. Words: 153,440. Language: English. Published: September 21, 2012. Category: Fiction
This is a retelling of Dante's "Divine Comedy," in which Dante tells about visiting the Inferno, the Mountain of Purgatory, and Paradise.
Dante's "Paradise": A Retelling in Prose
By David Bruce
Price: $2.00 USD. Words: 58,240. Language: English. Published: September 21, 2012. Category: Fiction
This book is a retelling in prose of Dante's "Paradise," the third part of his "Divine Comedy."
The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans (Volume 7)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans, Book 7. Price: Free! Words: 70,570. Language: English. Published: August 19, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 stories of Good Samaritans and Heroes. A Sample: Good deeds tend to be practical and pragmatic rather than elegant. In 1977, poet Deena Metzger fell on an icy street in New York City. A black man saw her and ordered two young males who happened to be walking nearby, “Pick that woman up!”
Dante's Purgatory: A Retelling in Prose
By David Bruce
Price: $2.00 USD. Words: 51,030. Language: English. Published: August 2, 2012. Category: Fiction
This is a retelling in prose of Dante's "Purgatory," the second part of his "Divine Comedy." In this volume, Dante the Pilgrim climbs the Mountain of Purgatory with his guide, the Roman epic poet Virgil. Dante purges the seven deadly sins, and at the top of the mountain he finds the Forest of Eden, aka the Garden of Eden. Finally, he sees Beatrice for the first time after her death.
Reality is Fabulous: 250 Anecdotes and Stories
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 32,010. Language: English. Published: July 30, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes, including this one: Marion Davies once invited teetotaler Calvin Coolidge to one of her parties and deliberately served him sweet wine, telling him that it was fruit juice. Mr. Coolidge liked the beverage so much that he had three servings and told his hostess, “I don’t know when I’ve had anything as refreshing.”
The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans (Volume 6)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans, Book 6. Price: Free! Words: 75,260. Language: English. Published: July 11, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 stories about heroes and Good Samaritans.
The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans (Volume 5)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans, Book 5. Price: Free! Words: 75,300. Language: English. Published: May 28, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 stories about heroic rescues, good deeds, and kindness.
The Coolest People in the Arts: 250 Anecdotes and Stories
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,610. Language: English. Published: May 8, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
A Sample: Margot Fonteyn once was surprised to find out that a man she had thought was half-Oriental was actually 100% Panamanian. It turned out that as a boy he had lived in Japan. His face was injured in an earthquake, and the Japanese doctors performing plastic surgery on him had given him an Oriental appearance.
Boredom is Anti-Life: 250 Anecdotes and Stories
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,200. Language: English. Published: April 28, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
A Sample: Ballerina Tanaquil Le Clercq paid no attention to the superstition that it is bad luck to whistle in a dressing room, but she once shared a dressing room with a ballerina who did. Because the only way to get rid of the bad luck is to go outside the dressing room and twirl three times, Ms. Le Clercq says that “for one whole season I spent more time twirling off stage than on.”
The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans (Volume 4)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans, Book 4. Price: Free! Words: 64,870. Language: English. Published: March 24, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 stories about heroes and Good Samaritans.
Problem-Solving 101: Can You Solve the Problem?
By David Bruce
Price: Free! Words: 7,690. Language: English. Published: March 10, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
On the banks of the Chickahominy River, George Armstrong Custer once listened for a while to his superior officers argue about the depth of the river, then he solved the problem of determining how deep the river was. How did he do it?
The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans (Volume 3)
By David Bruce
Series: The Kindest People: Heroes and Good Samaritans, Book 3. Price: Free! Words: 73,940. Language: English. Published: January 7, 2012. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 stories about heroes and Good Samaritans.
The Funniest People in Families, Volume 6: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 6 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 6. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,850. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: It took decades for sculptor Louise Nevelson to become recognized as a major American artist. After she had become famous, a museum executive arrived 10 minutes late for a meeting with her, and he apologized. Ms. Nevelson replied, “What’s 10 minutes? Where were you 10 years ago?”
The Funniest People in Families, Volume 5: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 5 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 5. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 23,000. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: One Sunday, Texas preacher Edwin Porter was preaching when his three-year-old grandson grew tired. The grandson stood up on the pew and said in a loud voice, “Granddaddy, that will be about enough.” Mr. Porter immediately said, “We will close the service by singing, ‘Praise God from whom all blessings flow.’”
The Funniest People in Families, Volume 4: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 4 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 4. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 25,130. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Travelers must often be problem solvers. While traveling in Russia, Betty Clabaugh (the sister of Doris Jadan, wife of tenor Ivan Jadan) knew that she shouldn’t drink the water. Therefore, she brushed her teeth with champagne.
The Funniest People in Families, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 3 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 3. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 26,900. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: In 1968, the New York Radical Women protested the Miss America pageant because they regarded it as being sexist. The activists filled a trash can with objects that they believed oppressed women, including bras, girdles, stiletto heels, and tweezers, and they chose—and put a crown on—their own, alternative Miss America: a live sheep.
The Funniest People in Families, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 2 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 21,850. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Patricia Cockburn’s mother once discovered the butler drunk and under the dining room table moments before a dinner party was to begin. She told him, “Stay where you are, Jones, and don’t touch any of the ladies’ ankles.”
The Most Interesting People Who Live Life, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Most Interesting People Who Live Life, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,720. Language: English. Published: November 27, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Jimmy Piersall was an amazing center fielder who could both make seemingly impossible catches and rifle the baseball to home plate. Manager Casey Stengel was once asked if his team would run on Mr. Piersall. Mr. Stengel replied, “Oh, sure. We’ll run on him—every time somebody hits the ball over the center-field fence.”
The Most Interesting People Who Live Life: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Most Interesting People Who Live Life, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 23,450. Language: English. Published: November 26, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Nancy Cartwright, the voice of TV’s Bart Simpson, owns these vanity license plates: ELBARTO and DNTHVCW (short for Don’t Have a Cow). Before she could afford to buy good cars, she owned a 1968 Opel Kadette, paying $350 for it although it could barely go 45 mph. Because people got so angry at how slowly she drove, she put this bumper sticker on it: “It’s floored.”
The Most Interesting People in Movies: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 27,910. Language: English. Published: November 26, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: When Yousuf Karsh went to Peter Lorre’s home to photograph the famous actor, he saw a sign by the driveway: “Beware of Ferocious Dogs.” The “ferocious dogs” turned out to be a couple of frisky Pekinese, a breed of very small, toy-sized dogs.
The Funniest People Who Live Life, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People Who Live Life, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,480. Language: English. Published: November 26, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Groucho Marx once asked Melinda, his little daughter, what she did at nursery school. She replied, “Oh, Daddy, all we do is paint and go to the toilet.” Groucho called this “the most accurate description of a nursery school that’s ever been uttered.”
The Funniest People in Families: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Families, Book 1 · The Funniest People in Families, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,010. Language: English. Published: November 26, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: While Eve Arden, famous especially for her radio and TV lead character in "Our Miss Brooks," was having labor pains for her son (Douglas), she ran into one small problem—nurses in the pre-labor room kept asking her for her autograph.
The Most Interesting People in Politics and History, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Most Interesting People in Politics and History, Book 3. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 24,730. Language: English. Published: November 25, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Bob Rafsky suffered from AIDS, and he was an activist for AIDS research. One day, he went to a Japanese pharmaceuticals company to ask why research was being delayed on a promising new drug. To make a point, he rolled the leg of his pants up, and then showed the executives a lesion-covered leg. (Some anecdotes are thought provoking rather than funny.)
The Most Interesting People in Politics and History, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Most Interesting People in Politics and History, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,450. Language: English. Published: November 25, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Activist Abbie Hoffman was under constant surveillance by government agents for five years. He handled this situation well—when he needed to go somewhere, he used to hitchhike and get a ride with the agents who were trailing him.
The Most Interesting People in Politics and History: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Most Interesting People in Politics and History, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 27,140. Language: English. Published: November 25, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Australians know how to engage in activism. When the Australian prime minister would not apologize to Aborigine peoples because of the removal of Aboriginal children from their homes, 250,000 people in Sydney walked on the Sydney Harbour bridge on May 28, 2000, and a plane above the bridge skywrote the word “Sorry.”
The Funniest People in Relationships: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,640. Language: English. Published: November 24, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Some happily married heterosexual men like to dress like women. One way to get the proper female frontal development is for the man to wear a mastectomy bra. Many wives have ordered a mastectomy bra and been treated so nicely by the sales staff over the telephone that they have been tempted to say, “Don’t worry. I don’t have breast cancer. My husband just likes to wear a bra.”
The Most Interesting People in Sports: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 27,140. Language: English. Published: November 23, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Hugh Troy once worked as a sports reporter for the student newspaper at Cornell. As a reporter, he gave the newspaper the reports of track and field meets, but he felt bad for whoever finished last in an event. Therefore, he invented the name “Johnny Tsal” and always listed Johnny Tsal as finishing last in whatever event he was covering.
The Funniest People Who Live Life
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People Who Live Life, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 20,930. Language: English. Published: November 23, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Comedian Bill Hicks and his comedian friends loved to watch such religious programs as "The PTL [Praise the Lord and People That Love] Club." They used to make bets about how long it would take the preacher to stop talking about Jesus and start talking about dollars.
The Funniest People in Sports, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Sports, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 26,540. Language: English. Published: November 22, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: When future NFL player Pat Tillman was attending Arizona State, his coach, Bruce Snyder, planned to redshirt him, thus keeping him eligible to play college football for an additional year. Mr. Tillman told him, “You can do whatever you want with me, but in four years I’m gone. I’ve got things to do with my life.”
The Funniest People in Sports: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Sports, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 24,490. Language: English. Published: November 21, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Joe Venuti played jazz violin much better than he played golf. After hitting the ball into the lake at the Lakeside Golf Club in Hollywood, Mr. Venuti became so frustrated that he threw his club into the water, then he threw his other clubs and golf bag into the water, then he picked up his caddy and threw him into the water, and finally he threw himself into the water.
The Most Interesting People in Religion: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,910. Language: English. Published: November 21, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Lessons can be learned in strange ways. John Wesley and Samuel Bradburn once witnessed an angry quarrel between two women who used bad language but who used it passionately and well and with their whole being. Mr. Bradburn was disgusted by the language and wanted to leave, but Mr. Wesley told him, “Stay—and learn how to preach.”
250 Anecdotes About Religion: Volume 2
By David Bruce
Series: 250 Anecdotes About Religion, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 23,560. Language: English. Published: November 20, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: In the family of Quaker humorist Tom Mullen, as part of the Christmas tradition the youngest child opened her presents first. The youngest child was Ruthie, who was not as materialistic as her siblings. For Ruthie a great part of the pleasure of Christmas lay in making her siblings wait a long time to open their presents.
250 Anecdotes About Religion
By David Bruce
Series: 250 Anecdotes About Religion, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 23,850. Language: English. Published: November 20, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Andrew Carnegie was a very wealthy man who had a reputation for donating money to charitable causes. Mark Twain wrote him to say that he wanted to buy a $2 hymnbook, pointing out that “I will bless you, God will bless you and it will do a great deal of good.” Mr. Twain then added a postscript: “Don’t send the hymn-book—send me the two dollars.”
The Funniest People in Neighborhoods: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 25,640. Language: English. Published: November 19, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A Sample: As a child, Hugh McIlhenny, aka “The King,” developed his incredible ability to run with the football. His mother used to send him to go to the store, and to get to the store, he had to go through a scary dark alley. Whenever he had to go through the alley, he ran as fast as he could to escape the dangers he thought were lurking hidden in the shadows.
The Funniest People in Television and Radio: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 24,220. Language: English. Published: November 18, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Humorist Frank Sullivan had a sister named Kate, who bought a TV in the days when TVs were rare. Very quickly, she called a TV repairman, who asked, “What seems to be wrong with it?” She replied, “Well, for one thing, a lot of the programs are lousy.”
The Funniest People in Books, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Books, Book 3 · The Funniest People in Books, Book 3. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,350. Language: English. Published: November 17, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: When poet Robert Frost was growing up, his favorite book was "Tom Brown’s Schooldays," which was one of the books that his mother read out loud to her children. Young Robert loved the book so much that he wanted his mother to read and reread the other chapters, but he wouldn’t let her read the ending. Why? He wanted the book to never end.
The Funniest People in Books, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Books, Book 2 · The Funniest People in Books, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 26,460. Language: English. Published: November 16, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample anecdote: Some sentences have more than one meaning, including contradictory meanings. (A pause in a sentence can be important.) Poet Robert Southey hinted around for a compliment about 'Madoc,' his epic, so classical scholar Richard Porson said, “'Madoc' will be remembered—when Homer and Virgil are forgotten.”
Be a Work of Art: 250 Anecdotes and Stories
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 27,740. Language: English. Published: November 15, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample anecdote: Very often, an actor would have trouble with part of his role, whether it was speaking a line or performing some piece of business, and he would go to theatrical director Tyrone Guthrie for help. Often, Mr. Guthrie would have the answer at hand, but if he did not, he would tell the actor, “Go home, think about it, come back, and astonish us in the morning.”
The Funniest People in Theater: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,700. Language: English. Published: November 11, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes about the theater, including this one: Early in her career, actress Diana Rigg was regarded as something of a kook by her neighbors because she used to lose her keys a few times a year and be forced to gain entry to her apartment by throwing a milk bottle through a window.
The Funniest People in Music, Volume 3: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Music, Book 3. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 25,960. Language: English. Published: October 30, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Even very good musicians can have an off night. A team of musicians led by jazz saxophonist Branford Marsalis once mightily messed up “April in Paris.” After they had “played” the song, Mr. Marsalis announced to the audience that they had just heard “April Embarrassed.”
The Funniest People in Music, Volume 2: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Music, Book 2. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 25,720. Language: English. Published: October 30, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: Giacomo Puccini enjoyed hunting pheasant. While living in the country so he could work on composing a new opera, he used to hire someone to go to his composing room and play the music he had written so that his wife would think that he was working on the opera when he was really out hunting.
The Funniest People in Music: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Music, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,140. Language: English. Published: October 30, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample: World-renowned conductor Pierre Monteux was once denied a room at a hotel, but when the manager discovered that Mr. Monteux was famous, he said that he could arrange a room for him because Mr. Monteux was “somebody.” Mr. Monteux refused the room and departed, saying, “Everybody is somebody.”
The Funniest People in Books: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Series: The Funniest People in Books, Book 1 · The Funniest People in Books, Book 1. Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,650. Language: English. Published: October 25, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample anecdote: G.K. Chesterton visited Broadway and Times Square at night when the scene was brightly lit by advertising signs. He gazed at the sight for a while, then said to a friend, “How beautiful it would be for someone who could not read.”
The Funniest People in Comedy: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 21,440. Language: English. Published: October 25, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
A sample anecdote: Lou Costello of Abbott and Costello fame really got into Christmas, setting up an elaborate Christmas display each year with angels, music, reindeer, and many hundreds of Christmas lights. Comedian George Gobel lived across the street from Mr. Costello. Mr. Gobel did nothing for Christmas except to put up a sign that said, “See our display across the street.”
The Funniest People in Art: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 25,920. Language: English. Published: October 24, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
This contains 250 anecdotes, including this one: When he was a small boy, Quaker artist Benjamin West made brushes out of hairs from his family’s pet cat, but he had to stop doing this after his father noticed that the cat looked as if it had been severely attacked by moths.
The Funniest People in Dance: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 22,320. Language: English. Published: October 23, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes, including this one: Alicia Markova was dancing the role of the Sugar Plum Fairy when Doris, her sister, sitting in the audience, overheard a little boy give what Ms. Markova considered the greatest compliment of her career. The little boy saw the Sugar Plum Fairy, then turned to his mother and said, “Can I have her for my Christmas tree next year?”
The Coolest People in Comedy: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 26,530. Language: English. Published: October 22, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes, including this one: Starting out as a stand-up comedian can be tough. Dallas comedian Sherry Belle remembers getting laughs her first time on stage; unfortunately, the audience was laughing at all the wrong places. For example, she finished a joke, but the audience didn’t laugh, so she said, “That was the punch line.” That made the audience laugh.
Don't Fear the Reaper: 250 Anecdotes
By David Bruce
Price: $1.00 USD. Words: 29,890. Language: English. Published: October 21, 2011. Category: Nonfiction
This book contains 250 anecdotes, including this one: Donald Ogden Stewart once told a harrowing story to a society lady about how his sloop had been capsized and he had to struggle for his life and was in danger of drowning near the Clews’ house—at this point the society lady interrupted by asking, “How are the Clews?”

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David Bruce's favorite authors on Smashwords


Smashwords book reviews by David Bruce

  • The Princess & the Penis on March 15, 2011
    star star star star star
    RJ Silver is a talented writer. He has a light touch and does not write actual pornography, but rather somewhat naughty fairytales.