I write comedy sometimes, so far I have made £84 from my work. Not long till I can retire
I wrote a sketch show for a student touring production. That was 2 years ago and they've still not toured with it, lazy scrounging Pot Noodle loving bastards
I submit sketches several times a year to radio shows like Newsjack, they always use them (four times in 15 months)
I stay in Edinburgh with my 3 cats, Phil, Shirley and wee Dugface
If you're a bit nosy and want to know more you can follow me on twitter at @Markaroni_
All the money I make from my books go to a good cause, mostly Pringles and battered Mars bars
Where to find Mark Ure online
Where to buy in print
by Mark Ure
Danny is a heroin addict, his mum was a crystal meth addict, she sold him when he was a kid for £25.
Read his story and tips on how to survive in the streets.
Comedy book, not to be taken seriously.
Don't download if easily offended.
by Mark Ure
Why waste a tenner on your favourite celebrities autobiography when you can read this for the price of a litre bottle of White Lightning?
This is my life story, most of it is made up but so is Harry Potter.
I'll leave the decision with you but if you don't buy it everyone will know that you're a jakey
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