I read your free ebook and I have to say, I was on my toes the whole time...I couldn't seem to stop reading and at points my heart was beating really fast. Amazing writing.
Committed: A Short Story
on Aug. 21, 2011
So I read you're short story and I really, really liked it. I thought it was really well written and you got into the Robert character pretty well. The only thing I think I would have liked is if you had explained more about how Layla committed suicide. If Robert was so obsessed with his friend's suicide I would think that he would think about how exactly she did it. I know I did that when a friend of mine committed suicide.
Other than that I thought it was a great short story and you are a very talented writer.
This is a good story and I think it could be even better if you make it a little longer. I was kind of confused about why everyone was writing in her journal because you never mention shelly was sick or anything. I'm not sure if you purposely did that or what but I got confused. Still it's a great story and I think you can make something really good out of it if you wanted to extend it a little. Good luck and happy writing!