A writer, a salesman, an optimist, a dreamer. May the four always cohabit and produce wondrous progeny. His hope is that his writing, here, exemplifies that for you. He is married and writes out of Bakersfield, California.
The recipe for the young achiever: When you sit, sit. When you stand, stand... But don't wobble. Meet an inveterate old wobbler. Decry me if you will, but, life can be more interesting among the brambles a little bit off the beaten path.
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BENT: Wake or Cross
by Jay Squires
Johnny's Shrink is trying to convince him he is dead, or he is locked in a dream from which he needs to wake. How odd that must appear to Johnny, just exhaled from a nondescript rectangular container, and now sitting before this man who appears as jolly as a younger version of a gnarly Santa. Johnny has no memory of anything, even his name, yet is doled out his life-history by this Santa-shrink.
Lying on the Alter of Self-Sacrifice
by Jay Squires
Lena was never "in love" with Robin. That didn't stop her from marrying him, thanks to his Sister, Maretta's, matchmaking skills. She felt it was important to convince Lena that marrying out of romantic love was of recent history. Marry Robin first and she would grow to love him. Was there something Maretta was hiding about Robin? And was there something Lena was hiding from herself about Maretta?
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Two.5 from Eric
on March 22, 2011
After reading the two short stories and the intro to Eric's novel, I must say I enjoyed more the feeling of relaxed competence in the snippet of the novel. The short stories, in contrast, seemed a bit clipped and less natural. I did admire his restsraint in the first short story having the narrator pick up the revolver and leaving it to the reader's imagination what he might do with it.
Both short stories had some typos and grammatical errors that I would prefer to comment on in an email or message board, but could find neither.
On the novel you invited constructive criticism, and, while this isn't FanStory, I'd be happy to comply with your invitation: You had a who/whom error in location 401, and I'm hoping it's a typo in location 506 "...how long IS I expected to perform in this capaacity." There's a definite type in location 525, "The Church has is recent years", while in 536 you've a bit of a redundancy in "...the forest here is thick here."
All in all though, I enjoyed what I read in the novel and will look forward to its polished publication.
The illiterates guide to writing ebooks
on March 23, 2011
I read with great interest your snazzy little tract on writing, fleshing out and marketing. You did a helluva lot in few words. For that I commend you. It should help a lot of beginning writers to get their feet wet in the self-publishing business. I would like to have seen you take a little more time editing without disrupting the excellent conversationality (phew!) of your tone. Thanks for the advise. Free is nice.
Helium3 Episode 1
on March 25, 2011
Nick, you are a superb writer with an ease of delivery while keeping the plot taut, the line of complication always ascending to the climax, the characters well-fleshed and fascinating and doing it all in an easy reading style. Congratulations.
He stepped from my dreams
on March 28, 2011
I appreciate what the author is trying to do in this vignette. Only, I think the subject deserves longer treatment. Mark has some quite evocative descriptions on the beach scene, such as the following:
“Get of my island,” called the man, pointing at the water’s edge. The man abruptly stopped and towered over the girl. His short shadow plunged her face into shade. Elizabeth sensed his aggression as he hovered over her like a cloud. “Get off my island,” the man hissed for the third time. “You are trespassing on private property.”
The problem, in my estimation, of such a short story involving such a lofty subject as LOVE is that there is not enough "story time" or physical space to develop the characters to be realistic personifications. This is a pity because the characters are likeable... only they're not on the stage long enough to be truly memorable.
The Princess and The Chauffeur
on June 07, 2011
Eva is a spoiled, rich little girl in a grown-up body. Adam is a responsible, moral, young hunk of a man, who just happens to be her daddy’s chauffeur. Most any time a romance writer puts the likes of these two together you might expect a rocky romance arising from their social inequality one that falls within the pattern of boy meets girl/boy loses girl/boy gets girl -- that and little more.
Well… you can just put those expectations behind you. Given the skill of a writer like Arjuna you have the raw energy of youth, a bit of the spirit of social/parental defiance, an uncompromising attraction all mixed together with scene after scene of titillating physical romance -- okay, say it -- lovemaking. Even given that, I am reluctant to use the word “sex” here because Eva’s soulfulness and Adam’s moral character (and with the author’s foreknowledge and consummate skill in revealing it) elevate what might be otherwise considered a mindless instinctual exercise to a landscape where each exciting interlude is but foreplay leading to the second, and the second to the third (oh, and there are many more than three) until the inevitable crescendo. It is a building of energy and suspense that keeps the reader on the edge of his seat to the last page.
Up to now, I have not been much of a romance reader. The Princess and the Chauffeur may be the only one I’ll read this year. On the other hand, this fine example might cause me to reevaluate the genre. One thing is sure though: It has set a high bar!