Nelson Lynch


An Eastern Shore native. A charter member of "The First Saturday Writers." An army vet and retired school teacher. He lives on his farm with his wife Jeanne, Clyde, the Taylorville Hound, three chickens and a marauding fox.

Where to find Nelson Lynch online

Where to buy in print


The Second Noelle
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 3,850. Language: English. Published: November 2, 2012. Categories: Fiction » Christian » Contemporary, Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
A shooting star illuminates the midnight sky. A woman asks, “Where are Joseph and Mary?” Joseph asks for lodging in their barn. Three farmers appear looking for a lost lamb. Three salesmen arrive with gifts from Publishers’ Clearing House. Three women bring pamphlets describing the birth of the universe. A coyote howls. A donkey brays. An owl screams.
Edgar Cayce and the Sheriff
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 104,730. Language: English. Published: September 9, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » General
A Worcester County woman has been missing for six months. The police chief tries an end run, calling in a policewoman from Baltimore to masquerade as a world-famous psychic. When the killer reads that this (fake) famous seer is going to consult with Edgar Cayce from the Great Beyond, he plots her murder with the aid of horoscopes
Murder, Wetlands and an Endangered Species
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 90,410. Language: English. Published: August 20, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » Historical
This is a story about a prime waterfront farm on Chincoteague Bay on Maryland’s Eastern Shore. It has the northern most brown pelican rookery in the United States. Developers, politicians and environmentalists are waging a war for possession.
Assateague Rum Runners
Price: Free! Words: 4,270. Language: English. Published: July 13, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Literature » Literary
A fiction story of rum and scotch being unloaded to Assateague Island during prohibition. The schooner anchored offshore and the whiskey was brought to shore by small boats. A storm approached and the ocean becomes nasty. Also love in the Valley of Kings plus a soldier waits as a scimitar is being sharpened.
The Taylorville Pearl
Price: Free! Words: 4,590. Language: English. Published: July 12, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
The Countess of Crisfield and the Baron of Bishopville stop at an inn in rural Eastern Shore during the Revolutionary era. They want rooms, ale and dozens of oysters. The beautiful Duchess of Dorchester arrives and also needs a room. There is only one room but the barn loft has clean hay. The Duchess finds a beautiful black pearl in her oyster. Everyone claims it, including Joanna, the innkeeper
Space Ambassadors
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 16,230. Language: English. Published: July 9, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
Caleb, a good ole Ozark boy, says the barmaid is an alien. He swears she has three breasts, six fingers and seven toes. Bill disagrees. He invites her and her friend Magellana to a catfish fry at a local church. Caleb says they are vampires.
Cosmic Egg
Price: Free! Words: 4,230. Language: English. Published: July 9, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Jerome and Bill are very close to flunking out of their college astronomy course. Jerome wants to impress the top student, a blonde. Their next lesson is about the different creation theories.
Spousal Abuse
Price: Free! Words: 3,260. Language: English. Published: July 8, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
His second wife has trouble fixing his special Bombay martini. A woman writes of her visit to the Head Hunters of Borneo A man wants a cell phone in his casket. He fears the undertaker may cremate him too soon. An alien civilization is in trouble. Their DNA is not stable. They buy humans to use their DNA to aid in saving their people.
Price: Free! Words: 2,400. Language: English. Published: June 28, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(2.75 from 4 reviews)
Her husband appears two weeks after she receives his urn. George suspects foul play from his wife. He is running a minus temperature. He wants to go to bed to warm up. She wants nothing to do with that idea.
At the Track
Price: Free! Words: 3,300. Language: English. Published: June 28, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
A lightning bolt rearranges his brain. He tries slowing racehorses with his mind.
The Feng Shui Woman
Price: Free! Words: 3,620. Language: English. Published: June 28, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
She exorcises spirits from a distant time and place in Africa.
Space Trip
Price: Free! Words: 4,320. Language: English. Published: June 28, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
The ship wakes Charlie up after only ten years of a hundred year trip
Aliens Stranded in Las Vegas
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 9,930. Language: English. Published: June 28, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
Two aliens are searching for an engine part and sex in Las Vegas. They favor tequila shooters and beer chasers.
Jack the Frogmaker
Price: Free! Words: 1,130. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(5.00 from 3 reviews)
Jack, the Frogmaker strikes at women in the heart of London. Joanne and Lucy are working girls and are scared to venture out. Jack, the ladies think, has turned Janet into a frog. They feed the frog some of London's finest gin.
Sex Deal
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 11,720. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
A woman has aliens paint her body on a distant planet. Mildly erotic.
Brother Ezra
Price: Free! Words: 7,090. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
The sheriff investigates the town bum, known now as brother Ezra, who has found God and speaks in tongues.
CIA and the Nine Ball Tournament
Price: Free! Words: 3,340. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
The CIA thinks her husband, a friend and his wife are terrorists on their way to Baghdad while she says they are shooting pool at the local pool hall.
Mary Magdalene and the Escapee
Price: Free! Words: 3,170. Language: English. Published: June 27, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
Two men in white coats are searching for an escapee. He wanders into a book signing. The author captivates him and he signs on as her helper.
Turkey Trot
Price: Free! Words: 2,140. Language: English. Published: June 8, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(2.33 from 3 reviews)
A spy has a package to deliver. He is not sure of the contact. Her hair is light brown, not blonde. Her green sweater is not solid, it has yellow triangles. What should he do? They are meeting in a honky tonk dance hall.. She asks him to do the Turkey Trot with her. It is close to the password.
Singing Fool of Afghanistan
Price: Free! Words: 2,590. Language: English. Published: June 7, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Adventure » War & military adventure
(3.00 from 1 review)
Jack’s helmet is hit by enemy sniper fire while on a patrol in Afghanistan. The concussion causes him to sing most everything. Their orders were to go ten klicks and check for enemy activity. Sergeant Evans decides to return to base with the wounded soldier.
Time, an Essay
Price: Free! Words: 1,210. Language: English. Published: June 7, 2011. Categories: Essay » Literature
(4.00 from 1 review)
A humorous essay on time, the election and possible catastrophic occurrences.
Madness and the Modern Home
Price: Free! Words: 1,410. Language: English. Published: June 6, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Literature » Literary
(4.50 from 2 reviews)
His wife wants a bronze microwave. He wants an old wood burning cook stove like his mother used He doesn’t want any of the new fangled appliances that emit x-rays and gamma rays into the home.
Price: Free! Words: 1,150. Language: English. Published: June 5, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Humor & comedy » General
(4.00 from 1 review)
A woman goes to a nursery for heirloom tomatoes. Cherokee Black. Aunt Ruby’s green or Brandywines. Tom only has hybrids and tries to sell her a yellow hybrid with a shelf life of two weeks. The woman will have nothing to do with it. She wants an old standby that is picked in the morning and eaten at lunch. Tom thinks she fell from the back of the turnip truck more than once.
Price: Free! Words: 1,930. Language: English. Published: June 5, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Science fiction » General
(4.67 from 3 reviews)
The Taylorville Writer is having problems with his memory. He thinks he is fine. His wife thinks otherwise. She gives him three words to remember and goes to the drug store. He is primed and ready for the question. When she returns, walks around eating a candy bar and talking about other things. Then she finally asks what are the three little words?
Taliban Alien Terrorists
Price: $0.99 USD. Words: 6,710. Language: English. Published: June 2, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Thriller & suspense » Spies & espionage
Hector Aquarius and Venus Pisces are sent to Afghanistan to check on aliens helping the Taliban. Their superiors at a super top-secret organization wanted verification that there were extraterrestrial aliens fighting against the US forces.
Price: Free! Words: 2,560. Language: English. Published: May 15, 2011. Categories: Fiction » Mystery & detective » Short Stories
Two small time hoodlums travel to Horizon Street. They heard, from another crook, that easy money could be had from the Oracle living there. But, of course, the Oracle had different ideas about easy money and being an easy mark.

Nelson Lynch's tag cloud

abuse    afghanistan    alien contact    aliens    ark    assateague    astronomy    asylum    barrier islands    berlin    berlin maryland    betting    big bang    bishopville    book signing    born again    borneo    brown pelicans    chincoteague    chincoteague bay    christian    christmas    college    cooling sleep    creation    cremation    dance    deep space    demented    deputy baker    developers    dna    eastern shore    edgar cayce    election    endangered    endangered species    environment    erotic    exorcise    feng shui    fish fry    fortune teller    four corners    frog maker    grand canyon    head hunters    healing    hogskull press    horizon    humor    hybrid    jack the ripper    joseph and mary    las vegas    lugnut    madame z    magellanic clouds    martini    mary magdalene    membranes theory    microwave    noah    noel    noelle    ocean city    old wood stove    oracle    oysters    painted women    planet drago    prohibition    racing    radiation    religion    rum runner    sanity test    saved    schooner    science fiction    scifi    second christmas    second coming    secret agents    seer    seven sisters    sheriff abel    space travel    spies    spousal abuse    spy    taliban    tehran    tent meeting    terrorists    third wave    three words    time warp    tomato    top secret    traitors    turkey trot    vampires    worcester county   

Smashwords book reviews by Nelson Lynch