Sandy Brosam


I was once asked “What is the hardest thing about being a mother?” I told her not being one…

I have lived every parent’s worst fear twice, and learned to live with peace in my soul and allow joy and happiness back into my life.

My first child died suddenly in a car accident, and my fourth child died eight years later from cancer.

I was born in the desert of Arizona, but grew up in the mountains of the Pacific Northwest. Becoming an Author was not planned; it just came about as I went down my life path. I thought I was going to work in the local bank, have a couple of kids, and enjoy raising my family.

~It was a simple dream that never quite became my reality~

Becoming Bigger Than My Pain was born from my passion to help others with understanding and love. I am sharing a part of myself with everyone who reads this book. I hope this will bring about a better understanding of the pain and emotions that a family endures in the death of a child or loved one. My family and friends were all a huge part of my healing from Terry’s death, and with their love I was able to climb out of the darkness of depression, only to fall right back in when Brandon died.

I was once again struggling to become bigger than my own pain.

I chose to name the book “Becoming Bigger Than Our Pain” because truly it is not just my pain, or your pain, or their pain, it is OUR pain. And to work through the grief, one must become bigger.

The pain will always be there, but with MUCH LOVE, and GREAT COURAGE, we can truly...


And learn to live life again in our new tougher skin.

Why did I write this book?

In Brandon’s journey through cancer, and in his death, I was given the gift of love. Some people came into my life, who shared their love, and brought me a little bit of sunshine when I desperately needed it. It is to them that I dedicate this book, especially the Spokane Chapter of the Candlelighters, and Make-A-Wish Foundation of Washington State. I share my love with them as they share their love with others.

The first printing of this book was 20 years ago, in 1989. It was written by hand, and then typed with a typewriter, long before laptops and PC’s. The manuscript was stored on the first type of “flimsy” that current computers cannot read. So I had to retype the entire manuscript into an electronic format, which was a huge emotional project. I asked a friend to type the parts that I was not editing or adding, to help shorten my time spent in the painful world I write about. I have kept the pages the same only making some parts of Brandon’s story flow better, and kept most of the hand drawn artwork the same. I have been asked if I would write the same book today, and I know I would not. I would try to soften the book; to ease the pain the reader may feel themselves in reading the book. What I did do, was to add some of the letters I received from readers and poems for solace.

With this new edition of Love and Courage now titled
~Becoming Bigger Than Our Pain ~
I send hope, compassion, and gentle guidance to others and pay the love forward.

Smashwords Interview

What motivated you to become an indie author?
Over the years I have helped others with grief support, and when ebooks started getting more popular, I wanted to make my book available to others in this format. When I looked at reprinting the original version of Love & Courage, I wanted to add more information. So I decided since I had to retype the entire book as no computer uses or reads a 6" floppy disk, I would add some content to help with grief. Becoming Bigger Than Our Pain is about how to help someone grieving, or yourself. I help others in my daily life, but wanted a way to help many others with ebooks and print.
What inspires you to get out of bed each day?
Living my entire adult life with grief, I have grown to live in the moment, knowing full well this may be my last day, so why not make it a good one! I plan for the future, but I live in the present, and choose to find joy in my life verses sadness. I have learned to smile because I had my children in my life who passed before me, and remember the love, rather than to keep crying because they are gone from my arms, as they are still in my heart.

Life is a journey, and I truly believe we draw to us what we focus on the most. When I was so deeply engulfed in my grief, I saw no reason to even think I would ever be happy again. I continued to draw pain and suffering into my heart and soul until I was finally strong enough to move forward.
Read more of this interview.

Where to find Sandy Brosam online

Where to buy in print


Becoming Bigger Than Our Pain
Video trailer for the book.

Controlling Emotions on a Grief Journey
An inspirational video I made to help when days are tough to get thru.

Grief Beach
This is the theme song I wrote with my friend Kris Voelker for a grief retreat I organized in 2012.


Becoming Bigger Than Our Pain - Thru Love & Courage
Price: $6.99 USD. Words: 29,200. Language: English. Published: August 31, 2013. Categories: Nonfiction » Self-improvement » Death, Grief, Bereavement, Nonfiction » Inspiration » General self-help
What to say and do for those who are coping with a life threatening situation or death of a loved one. Sometime in your life either you, or someone close to you, will lose someone they love. This is a guide that not only gives you suggestions on what to say and do for others, it empowers you to become bigger than your own pain. This guide is about grief support from any loss.

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