I grew up as a military brat.
As a child, I wanted to do what was right by my family and friends and serve in the ARMY. I wanted to protect the homeland, for I am a patriot. I wanted to protect the very things that have become a staple of conversation for any American Christian. Only I never wanted to exclude those that came to this country from the joys of believing in a higher call to service and I never wanted the actions of errant fathers and mothers to determine where our youth end up. I never believed that any of us are the sum total of our faults. That there was always room for forgiveness, and making things better for those around us. Education being principal in the elevation of the mind. This separating the man from beast. Only having traveled abroad and having seen many countries, I have to ask, "What is the foundation of all of this education and how have we become better for it?"
I never had a stable home. Sure I had a mother and father and a good education. What I mean is, due to the travel at a young age, I never stayed in a school more than a year, so I never lived in one town more than a year and everywhere I lived I sought to showcase the love of Christ not only through word, but in deed.
I grew up in Germany for a lot of my youth, I saw the concentration camps of WW11 and the cobble stones. I have been to Transylvania and saw the castles of old. I have sat in temples of the Hindus and witnessed to Muslims, all before I turned fifteen. To this day, my mother has a hard time talking to me, because she believes I only speak in parables.
I was a vagabond, a fiddler and harp player on roofs and water towers for the better part of five years after college. I had sought to be a lawyer when I turned twenty. All in hopes of a better tomorrow.

I first started writing in journals when I was twenty in college.
Had a facebook page and because I was seeking to become a lawyer I wrote a lot of dissertations for paralegals and county clerks. To help pay for school. On my off time I played around with the idea of writing about why and when it happened that I noticed there needed to be a change.
By my third year I got very tired of the cycles that I was noticing and found it very hard to ignore, all those around me that were going to school with no aims of anything beyond liberal aspirations. I wanted to get paid, not only that I wanted to help people. Only it seemed, everyone liked the mess that has become our legal system.

Clive Dawson, an average writer is looking for absolution. While everyone else around him is looking for an identity, he swims through his tale with the sole ambition to find peace for his crimes that he never told anyone and even after his ultimate death could never really come to grips with. Absolution is hard. For everyone knows the person that you were and sees you as you are, yet once you find it, they can not explain the difference and only seek to claim you to be a liar.
Amethyst [N] [S]
one of the precious stones in the breastplate of the high priest ( Exodus 28:19 ; 39:12 ), and in the foundation of the New Jerusalem ( Revelation 21:20 ). The ancients thought that this stone had the power of dispelling drunkenness in all who wore or touched it, and hence its Greek name formed from a_, "privative," and _methuo , "to get drunk." Its Jewish name, ahlamah' , was derived by the rabbins from the Hebrew word halam , "to dream," from its supposed power of causing the wearer to dream.

It is a pale-blue crystallized quartz, varying to a dark purple blue. It is found in Persia and India, also in different parts of Europe.

I have for a long time thought the indie author's freedom of expression had been given too many abilities to the ignorant. I needed to become published fast because the institutions I have been dealing with in the past, where not going to allow this book to see the light of day. Way too controversial and too easy to take words out of context. Publishers wish to edit to make sales. Ask things like are you willing to make the story longer, or make sequel's or are you willing to cut things out of the book. Most are just afraid to say anything to offend anyone, and or they publish 1000 and 1 pages of filth.
The indie community is not going to tell me sex, drugs and rock and roll sell. That I must stay current with pop culture to be relevant and they are also not going to deny my truth.

I have been an indie fan since it first dawned on me that maybe a Libertine is simply that of the indie and it has always been the indie that has paved the way for the forgotten voice to be heard.
Certainly none of us would have known the story of the Hurricane had not indie picked it up.

They agreed to look into my stuff. I contacted Kevin personally and he was a great help in giving advice as to how to get started. He looked at my Outlook and thought there was something to it. The program gives the author freedoms to make there own mistakes and success and just wants to tag along for the ride. I can work with anyone willing to listen to the testimony that has helped shape the world I live in and seeks to make it better.

The greatest joy is the ability to capture the minds that read. Capture the minds that think and show them that there is a better way to do things. That the placid life we have been made to believe is real does not have to be so. That we all have the power to influence our surrounding. Certainly for the greater good and the betterment of out neighbors. It is the written word that some of the greatest orators have held onto as a motivational tool to get people to create and change laws that govern us. Isn't that amazing.
It is the spoken word that gets a man or woman out of prison or sent there. It is the resume that paints the picture of the person seeking a position from Human Resources that is more than Entry level. It is the power of the written word and the setting of placid green valleys at the end of the climax that is the greatest joy to me.
It is the telling of the stories of the roads less traveled by.

I can take criticism. I have always loved art. Written prose. Music.
Only in life I have learned not to weigh too much on the ideas of others. I like having fans but I can not allow what people like or dislike to gauge the story. I do want people to read it, though I am certain that writers like Leo Tolstoy never worried about fans.

Now if someone comes to me and says, "O my gosh, where do you come up with this stuff, that was great." I will sit with them and tell them about the good news. Only we do not do that to pick up fans or money. we do it because everyone needs to be heard and appreciated.

After this I will work on showing how not to let your past define you. How that after you become a better-man. To simply be so. That this world is a passing vapor and we never need to get caught up in things that are temporal. I will seek to show how it is ok for a man to make a living writing or as a starving artist and the fact that the starving needs to be taken away from the title of artist.

There was a time when someone was good at the arts and was given more than just a temporal handshake and never needed to be paid to feel like they were crazy because they could paint more than landscapes. There was a time when fashion was more than a digital pattern and had to be done by hand and these abilities of the hands should not be forgotten but passed on to many generations. College is great but I believe trades are better.

I love to talk KJV.
I am a fan of Shakespeare.
It is elementary my dear boy. C.S. Lewis, Charles Dickens. Hemmingway, Patricia Highsmith.

The sunrise. Purpose. The story, my goats. The fact that I work at a retreat center. The fact that there are so many that question there faith everyday and the need someone that says, "I understand."

Deep in thought and reflection of my life and of the faces that I have seen along the way. The souls that have cried out for help and those that I have helped. wanting to know if they remember me at all. Wondering if it is worth remembering them or if maybe my beautiful mind needs to think of better things.